Library and Archives Canada Cataloguing in Publication
Title: Dancing on a razor : tales of mercy from the lips of a prodigal / Kevin John White.
Names: White, Kevin John, 1960- author.
Description: “The heart of a desperate rebel?”
Identifiers: Canadiana 20190073810 | ISBN 9781988928104 (softcover)
Subjects: LCSH: White, Kevin John, 1960- | LCSH: Christian biography. | LCSH: Musicians—Biography.
| LCSH: Addicts—Biography. | LCSH: Homeless persons—Biography. | LCGFT: Autobiographies.
Classification: LCC BR1725.W45 A3 2019 | DDC 277.108/3092—dc23
For my father and mother, who gave me life and never
once lost hope …
and
for Steve and Julie Hill, who gave that life back
to me—then stood patiently by my side while I figured out
how the silly thing worked.
Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast … You hem me in behind and before, and you lay your hand upon me … You have searched me, Lord, and you know me … Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain. (Ps. 139:7–10, 5, 1, 6 NIV)
Contents
Chapter 5 – The Challenge Ode to My Brothers
Chapter 8 – War Wounds and Battle Scars
Chapter 9 – “You Don’t Love Me Anymore”
Chapter 11 – How Not to Die (Very Rudely)
Chapter 15 – I Just Can’t Help Myself
Chapter 16 – Be Careful What You Ask For
Chapter 17 – Selah: “Chew On This For A While”
Chapter 19 – Damned If You Don’t
Chapter 22 – About Falling Down … And Getting Up Again
An Unexpected Mirror: By Dr. Stephen Hill
Grace Finds You: By Julie Hill
Epilogue: In the Shadow of a Mountain
Acknowledgements
My deepest thanks to Larry Willard of Castle Quay Books for taking a chance on a wild-eyed scallywag like myself. To even consider working with such a dark horse was a real demonstration of both faith and courage. Thank you, Larry, for giving me a chance to tell of God’s great mercy to me and allowing me the privilege to share this story with others.
My specific thanks to the editors at Castle Quay Books, in particular Marina Hofman. I pray for your speedy recovery after what I’m sure was a deeply disturbing job (and that I NEVER find myself in your shoes!). Rest assured, the English language is once again safe due to your heroic efforts. My blessings and deepest respect. Thank you once again!
My particular thanks to the judges of the Word Guild Contest for both reading and appreciating the stories contained in Dancing on a Razor (and I’m dreadfully sorry for any grey hairs you may have accumulated as a result!).
Steve and Julie Hill: There are no thanks I could possibly give that would adequately express my gratitude for all the great patience, love, courage, and wisdom you have so generously lavished on my head. Thank you from every single atom in me, for not only your commitment to the work God began in me but also for your deep and very evident faith in our God, who brought you to the astonishing decision to reach out and help me.
To the rest of the Hill family—Ashley, Laurel, Megan, and Robert—all I can humbly say is “Yes! Your mother was abducted by an alien from outer space and needs all of you—so she can recover … from the shock!” Truthfully, I am astonished at the grace and patience you have shown me, both while I lived with you in your home and while I lived at your home when I had my own home to go to. Thank you, each one. I have watched and prayed as you have struggled and grown and overcome what