Avoiding the bed and anything bed-related, she settled on the love seat and poured two glasses of red before settling in.
“How are you feeling?” Vaughan asked at last, after draining half his glass.
“Tired. Like I could sleep three weeks.”
“And the broken engagement?”
She blew out a breath. “How do you feel about it?”
“I’m sorry his feelings got hurt, but I’m not sorry the engagement is broken. Is this...? You changed the locks. It’s for sure, then?”
“He and I had some elemental differences in parenting styles. It wasn’t a sacrifice I was willing to make. He was upset today, but I believe in time he’ll see my point and know I was right. I’ll miss his daughters.” Probably more than she’d miss Ross.
“He didn’t like me much.”
Kelly snorted. “You didn’t like him much.”
“We both wanted the same thing.”
She slammed her lips against the first reply she’d thought of giving. And then the second. By the third she was better able to get her thoughts together.
“And what was that?”
He smiled and her toes curled.
He was a human churro. He smelled good and she knew for damn sure he tasted good. She’d gorge herself on him and in both cases, she’d end up sorry later that she’d lost her control.
But she never missed a chance to attend an event where churros would be available.
And there he sat, in her bedroom, with a boner. Oh, holy shit he had a hard-on.
She blushed and looked down to her wine.
“He and I wanted you.”
Still blushing, avoiding looking anywhere but his face, Kelly waited for the rest.
“I’d like for you to give me a chance to prove myself. And once I do, I want you back.”
Kelly waited for more. This was a good start, but it wasn’t anywhere near enough.
He put his glass down, leaning forward, elbows on his knees. “I let you go before. I shouldn’t have. And then I waited too long to come to my senses and get you back. But I’m here now and ready to prove how much I’ve changed. I never stopped loving you.”
“Is that it? Because if it is, my next words are going to be fuck you.”
Surprise and then pleasure slid over his features. “You’re pissed.”
“Why does that make you happy? Did you hit your head on something?” She did such a bad job of picking men. Jeez.
“You’re sexy when you’re pissed. Course, you’re sexy when you’re not pissed, too.”
“Keep it up. See where cute gets you.” She frowned. “You’ve been gone nearly eight years by this point. A lot has changed. I’ve changed. Just because I’m not with Ross anymore doesn’t mean anything as far as you and I are concerned.” Which was a lie. At least she didn’t feel guilty when she’d thought about licking sugar and cinnamon off his abs just now, though.
He did have the good sense to be chagrined. “I know you’ve changed. I’ve changed, too. I’m not the same young, cocky asshole who let his whole life slip through his fingers.”
“And what does all that bullshit mean?”
“You’ve gotten hard.” He tried for saucy and she wanted to flick him in the nose for it.
“You haven’t said anything much more than that you still loved me and wanted a chance to get me back. What does that mean to you? Why should I give you a chance? You haven’t even articulated an actual apology for any of what you did.”
“I said I made mistakes. And I did. I let you go too easy.”
She’d been right about one thing. Just because she’d broken things off with Ross didn’t mean she had to run to Vaughan. Even if he was living in her house. Even if for years she’d wanted to hear the sincerity in his tone that night.
But it wasn’t enough. Kelly couldn’t begin to trust him enough at that point. He not only had a lot of proving himself to do, he also had to make some genuine apologies for what he’d done.
She had her own stuff to handle and she was way too busy to do this for him, even if she’d wanted to. And she didn’t. If Vaughan really wanted her back, he had to work for it. She could only let the hope remain that he’d actually open up and own what he did.
And, if he really wanted to be a more involved dad, she’d take him at his word. “Kensey needs to be up at seven. I’ll handle Maddie tonight. I’m going to sleep in her room.”
“Are you worried?” He shifted closer, concern on his face.
“No. But I’m her mom.” She shrugged. “I just want to be close if she needs me. As for Kensey, I suggest you get up at least half an hour before she does. You’ll need the time to wake up, get dressed and have coffee.” Their youngest was an absolute horror to get out of bed in the morning. “You need to be out the front door by five after eight or you’ll have to run.”
She stood and went to the door, opening it up. “Good night, Vaughan.”
“Wait, you’re kicking me out? I thought we were going to talk.”
“So did I. You can try again in the future. When you’re ready to really open up and talk.” She put the bottle of wine and her now-empty glass in his hands and pushed him into the hallway. “See you tomorrow.”
She closed the door, leaning against it to keep herself from opening it and inviting him back inside. A little roll between the sheets could work out a lot of energy. But it would be a supreme mistake.
She headed for the shower instead. A detachable showerhead was a girl’s best friend.
* * *
VAUGHAN LAY IN his bed, a yellow, lined legal pad at his right hand as he scribbled things here and there. The lyrical beginnings of a new song.
He found, even though he’d hoped she’d let him back into her life that night, that he wasn’t down that she’d kicked him out of her room.
That she’d snapped at him and kicked him out of her room had only underlined to him that she did care. She hadn’t tolerated him, or been barely interested in him. Not at all.
No longer remote, this Kelly was going to demand that he work for his redemption.
He could have said the words. But they taunted him. Just out of reach. Like if he said them, if he came out and said he’d betrayed her and violated her trust and his sense of honor and he’d ruined everything because he’d been a selfish asshole that she’d say, you’re right, get out.
And it would be over and done.
He had done those things. And yes, she’d made mistakes, too. But she’d come here to this suburban wonderland to build a life for their children. She’d given up nearly all modeling and put her focus on them.
And what she’d built was amazing. Their girls were lucky for it.
He rolled to his belly and began to write again.
KELLY FLIPPED THE SIGN on the door and unlocked it to admit Stacey.
“I brought you a smoothie. It’s got that powder you like.” Stacey’s lip curled. “I have to be in court soon, but you’re on my way