‘Oh, but I am! And I’ve got you to thank for that. You did right in making me see someone, because now I know what I must do.’ Putting his hands on her shoulders, Jack turned Molly to face him. ‘For the first time, I have something to go on. I need answers, and now I’m hopeful that maybe – just maybe – I’ll find out the truth.’
On the way home from work, Jack had thought long and hard about the series of events that had led him to these crossroads. Sharing his deeper thoughts with her, he said, ‘Don’t you think it’s strange, of all the places in the country where we could be opening a new showroom, the company chose to build it in Lytham St Anne’s, just a thirty-minute drive from the street where I grew up?’
Molly did not believe in fate; she preferred to think there was a rational explanation for everything. ‘There’s nothing “strange” about it, Jack.’ She gave a mocking little laugh. ‘It’s quite simple. The company chose to build the new showrooms in Lytham because they did their homework and decided a car-showroom was needed there. It’s business, Jack – plain and straight. It’s not some kind of celestial plan that’s meant to get you promoted and send you back to where you were born so you can find out if your nightmares are real.’
Jack was not altogether surprised by her cynicism. ‘So, why have you been asked to run the new showrooms, when there are any number of other people at Curtis Warren’s who are more than able to handle the responsibility?’
Agitated, Molly began pacing the floor. ‘It’s all academic anyway, because you’re not accepting the post. Or if you do, I won’t be going with you.’
‘You can’t mean that, Molly?’
‘Yes, Jack, I can, and do! And I want an answer right now.’ She swung round to face him. ‘Have you already signed the contract?’
‘Not yet, no. I’ll be handing it in tomorrow, signed and sealed, subject to Curtis Warren’s approval.’
‘Without even asking me?’
‘I’m asking you now, Molly. I want you with me.’
‘I take it this means you won’t be attending the clinic again?’
‘There’s no need. I know now what I have to do.’
‘Will anything I say make you change your mind?’
‘Please, Molly.’ Jack put his two arms about her. ‘Don’t do this.’ Drawing her close, he spoke softly. ‘We belong together, you and me. I don’t want to be without you. I want us to be married – to have children one day.’ He gave a nervous chuckle. ‘I want us to grow old together – you with your silver hair and me with my white beard and walking-stick. When we meander down the street, people will say, “Look! That’s the old couple with all them grandchildren.”’
Molly couldn’t help but laugh. ‘You’re crazy, you are.’
‘You’re right. I am – crazy for you.’
‘Then tell them you don’t want the job. Stay here, Jack. Attend the clinic. There’s no need to go chasing the past. Eventually it will all come right, you’ll see.’
Frustrated, Jack held her at arm’s length, ‘Do you love me, Molly?’
‘You know I do.’
‘Then why can’t you help me do this?’
‘Because it’s wrong!’ Angry at his dogged determination, she broke away from him. ‘We’re happy here, aren’t we?’
‘Well, yes, but we can be happy elsewhere just as well.’
Ignoring his comment, she pointed out, ‘Look, we have each other and we have our work. We’ve built a good life here together, and we’ve got plans. Why spoil it all now? Especially when you’ve finally found someone who can help you.’
Torn two ways, Jack paced back and forth across the kitchen, hands in his trouser pockets, and a look of desperation about him. Everything seemed to be falling apart between them, and he had to believe it was his fault.
‘Won’t you at least try to see it from my point of view, Molly?’ he asked. ‘You of all people know what it’s like with me. These nightmares are ruining my life – spoiling what we have! I need to clear my head, and I can’t do that unless I go back – to where it all began.’
He turned his back to her, his mind racing. ‘If I don’t try to find answers, Molly, I’ll never rest. I’ll never know! This is my chance and, more than anything, I want you there with me.’
The sound of footsteps made him swing round, only to find that Molly had gone.
‘Molly?’
Calling her name, he ran up the stairs two at a time, to find her in the bedroom, packing her suitcase. ‘Don’t do this!’ Jack was devastated. ‘Stay tonight at least. We can talk it through.’
Molly turned to him, her voice calm and cold. ‘If I do stay, will you change your mind about leaving here?’
For one desperate moment, Jack would have promised her the world if need be, just to keep her there. In his deepest heart though, he could not lie to her.
‘I’m sorry, Molly. I love you so much, and don’t want to lose you, but this is one time I need to do what my instincts tell me. So no, I won’t – I can’t – change my mind.’
‘And I can’t uproot myself just because you’ve got this crazy idea in your head. Tell them you don’t want the promotion. Go back to the clinic. In the end, it will work out. I know it will.’
Falling silent, Jack cast his gaze to the floor, and she knew she had lost. ‘All right, then. Do what you want. That’s fine by me!’ Slamming shut the suitcase, she swung it off the bed, pushed by him and ran down the stairs. At the bottom, she turned and looked up at him. She saw a man determined. A man who refused to give in to her. And what she saw, she did not like.
Without another word, she stormed out of the house, down the path and, throwing the suitcase into the boot of her car, she climbed into the driving seat, and slammed shut the door. Taking her frustration out, she switched on the engine, thrust home the gearstick and, putting her foot down hard, shot away without a backward glance, even though she knew Jack would be watching her every move.
From the upstairs window, Jack followed her movements. He knew from past experience that it was no good arguing with her. Yet long after she was out of sight, he remained at the window, hoping that he would eventually see the nose of the car peep round the corner on its way back. Then after a while, he realised that Molly was not coming back, and he was shattered.
Later, feeling tired and emotionally drained, he climbed into bed for an early night. He didn’t sleep, however; he simply catnapped, his mind alive with thoughts of Molly. It was not often that he went against her wishes. Should he have let her persuade him to abandon the idea of going north?
When the doubts began to set in, he angrily chided himself, ‘You are doing the right thing, Jack!’
Unable to settle, he went downstairs and made himself a mug of tea. For a while he examined his actions from Molly’s point of view. His emotions were mixed. He wanted her back, and most times he would do anything to settle an argument – but not this time. With or without her, he meant to go ahead with his plans. If he was proved wrong and there were no answers, would he be any worse off than he was now? Maybe not – except for losing Molly, and that was hard.
Jack was aware that he had set himself on a lonely path. After all, changing his workplace, moving to the other end of the country, risking a permanent break between himself and Molly – these were huge decisions.
Doubts began to niggle. ‘Am I setting myself up for