‘Louise.’ His calm voice only exacerbated her agitated one. ‘Clearly we did both want different things. I just felt that it was all moving too quickly. Yes, that night we had made love, but that night you had also made it clear that somewhere in the not-too-distant future you wanted a husband and babies.’
‘I didn’t say that!’ Louise said indignantly. ‘God, you make it sound as if I was desperate. If you care to remember, we were talking about where we saw ourselves in five years. I’d have been thirty-two by then…’
‘And I’d have been thirty-nine.’ Daniel shrugged. ‘And I realised that night we had different visions of our futures. It was just all getting too serious. Louise, you were talking of extending your stay in the UK because of me, because of us!’
‘Because I thought there was an us,’ Louise choked. ‘Because I thought you felt as strongly as I did. I thought we wanted the same thing.’
‘Well, we didn’t,’ Daniel broke in, shattering her already broken heart just a touch further, if that were possible. ‘Clearly! Elaine mentioned you had a baby now…’ Louise sucked in her breath, every nerve taut, staring at his expressionless face and trying to fathom what he was thinking, trying to work out her answer to the question that was surely, after all this time, coming. ‘And I’m glad for you,’ Daniel said, oblivious to the bewildered frown spreading over her face. ‘I’m pleased that you’ve found someone who makes you happy. I just wanted to be sure there were no hard feelings between us, given that we’re going to be working together.’
She couldn’t believe what she was hearing, had truly thought she was walking in the room to defend herself, to listen as he berated her for not telling him about their child, but instead he was wishing her and her supposed partner well!
‘That’s what you called me in to say?’ Her voice was shrill, her eyes blinking rapidly as she tried to take in what he was saying. She couldn’t believe that his denial could be so firmly ingrained. God, they’d been together a year ago and she had a three-month-old baby—how could it not even entered his head that Declan might well be his? Did he think she’d walked straight out of his bed and into someone else’s who could give her what she had apparently so badly wanted? ‘Daniel, I have a three-month-old baby—’
‘What did you call him?’ Daniel interrupted with that curiously snobby voice he used when he was addressing a patient or member of staff and keeping them at a distance.
‘Declan.’ She shook her head as if to clear it, stared at him open-mouthed, waiting—for what she didn’t know, revelation, realization? She truly didn’t know. But he just stared back.
‘And you’re happy?’ Daniel asked, and she felt his eyes drift down to her hand, clearly taking in the naked ring finger. ‘I mean, you and his father—
‘It didn’t work out between us.’ Finding her voice, she responded with the truth. ‘You know me—I’ve got lousy taste in men.’
He gave a pale smile at her thinly disguised insult. ‘So you’re on your own?’
She gave a nod, stared into the eyes of the man she had loved absolutely and wished to God she could hate him.
‘It certainly looks that way!’
‘You have to tell him!’
Pouring two glasses of wine, Maggie pushed one towards Louise. ‘And don’t tell me you can’t have a drink because you’re feeding—this is strictly medicinal!’
‘Believe me, I’m not going to.’ Taking a sip, Louise let out a long, exaggerated sigh, utterly exhausted physically from her first long day back at work and drained emotionally from the never-ending roller-coaster ride she’d embarked on the day she’d laid eyes on Daniel Ashwood.
‘They call him Danny!’
‘Of course they do.’ Maggie grinned. ‘I was Margaret until I met you—you Aussies change everyone’s names!’
‘You really didn’t know he was working there?’ Louise checked, her eyes narrowing in suspicion, but Maggie shook her head.
‘I’m as stunned as you are! Come on, Louise, it’s a massive hospital and there’s not exactly a huge demand for surgeons in the psychiatric ward—it’s not just the patients that are shut off from the rest of the world in the psych unit.’
‘I can’t believe he’s working in the same hospital. I mean, of all the places he could have ended up…’
‘That’s the only bit that’s not so hard to believe,’ Maggie said. ‘Come on, Louise, when you decided to move to the city, why did you pick Melbourne General?’
‘Because it’s the biggest hospital, because it has everything…’
‘Someone of Daniel’s calibre was hardly going to end up in a 200-bed suburban hospital,’ Maggie pointed out. ‘It’s why he’s in Australia that intrigues me! He has to know, Louise.’
‘He doesn’t want to know!’ Louise snapped, and then regretted it. ‘I’m sorry, Maggie, I don’t mean to take it out on you. I just can’t believe it didn’t even enter his head that Declan could be his! I’m serious,’ she said as Maggie gave her a very disbelieving look. ‘He wasn’t avoiding the issue—he honestly didn’t seem to think there could possibly be one!’
‘He’s a doctor, for heaven’s sake,’ Maggie argued. ‘You don’t have to be a mathematical genius to work out that you broke up last year and you’ve got a three-month-old baby!’
‘Ah, but I was out for a good time!’ Louise said with a distinct edge to her voice. ‘According to Daniel’s thinking, Declan could be anyone’s!’ Tears filled Louise’s eyes. ‘Is that what he thinks of me?’
‘It’s what he thinks of himself that worries me,’ Maggie said cryptically. ‘Louise, you have to look after yourself here. Stop trying to work out what he’s thinking—I don’t think you’re ever going to really know.’
‘When we were together,’ Louise gulped, closing her eyes at the bitter-sweet memory, ‘I felt as if I’d found my soulmate. I can remember seeing him on the ward that first time I did the doctors’ round—all aloof and snooty in his suit, just as he always was with everyone—then we did the ward round, and it was the first time I’d actually spoken to him, probably the first time he ever really looked at me. I remember saying something and he laughed, and I knew from everyone’s reaction that he was acting out of character. I just knew from the little I’d seen of him that he was distant and not very friendly, but with me he was like another person.’
‘He adored you,’ Maggie said gently, as a massive salty tear rolled down Louise’s cheek.
‘After that ward round he came back and I knew he was going to ask me out. I was just so completely and utterly sure that he’d come back…’
‘And he did.’ Maggie nodded.
‘It wasn’t just about having a good time and some sort of casual holiday fling,’ Louise insisted, despite the fact Maggie wasn’t disputing what she said, despite the evidence to the contrary, despite Daniel telling her face to face that it had been just that. ‘Those four weeks we were together were the closest I’ve ever been to another person, and Daniel can deny it all he likes but I know that at the time he felt it, too. I just don’t know why he suddenly changed his mind.’
‘Look, all you can do here is watch out for yourself. Frankly, I’m all for telling him. If he doesn’t want to offer emotional support then slug him for the financial. After all, he can afford it and you do need the