“Charlie—”
“No.” She held a hand up. “I’m not picking a fight. I’m here for Lily. Do what you have to, but know that if you can’t put her needs first, you will miss something beautiful in your life.”
He didn’t get a chance to add that he’d already lost out on the beauty in his life when she’d moved out three months ago. But just as quickly as she’d come in, she was gone, leaving him feeling just as he should … unworthy. He was nearly forty years old and all he had to show for his life were some Oscars on his bookshelves, numerous blockbuster films and a broken marriage. Had all the recognition and countless awards over the years been worth everything he’d sacrificed?
Dammit. Hindsight was hell on your conscience.
He’d known Charlotte would be hurt by his swift departure right after she’d moved back in, and had expected her to be angry, but he hadn’t anticipated her to give up without an argument. Not that he wanted to argue, but he was ready for it, had even rehearsed his speech. But he had to admit that her thinking so little of him hurt more than he thought it would. Her harsh words and cold stares, though, were nothing less than he deserved.
Her reaction, or lack thereof, slapped a dose of reality in his face. Obviously, he’d been a selfish bastard to her for a while and it took losing his wife and his sister, and gaining guardianship of his niece, for him to really wake up. Shame consumed him at the man he’d become, a man he barely recognized.
And now he was left holding his boxers, staring at the spot Charlotte had just vacated. Was she really just here for Lily? Could she turn off her feelings for him so easily? Did she have no intention at all of fighting for them? After all the time she’d begged him to go to counseling, he gave in and went … once. After all the years she’d told him she needed him to be around more, to be more attentive to her needs. True, he deserved no less. He certainly didn’t deserve her dedication or love, but he still needed her more than he ever could’ve imagined.
Well, she may be done, but he wasn’t. He refused to see that this marriage was coming to a close. This was his first attempt at juggling work and family now that he was making a conscious effort. Once he returned from his trip, he had a little surprise for his girls.
His girls.
Anthony smiled as he tossed in the last of his items and zipped his suitcase. He had two amazing females in his life and there was no way he was going to screw that up. Yes, Charlotte may be angry and hurt with him now, but once he arrived back home, she’d see just how committed he was to their new family.
New family seemed to be the theme for his life lately. Between the Danes and Lily, he’d taken on a whole new set of loved ones. He hoped Charlotte would go with him on this journey that was taking him from the only family he’d known into uncharted territory. Charlotte was his rock, the strongest point in his life. She was familiar and he needed her to hold on to during this life-altering time. She mattered more than anyone and he had to make her see that. He’d failed miserably in the past, but she was worth fighting for, and he wouldn’t stop now, just because things were getting difficult.
He’d turned his back on her during their marriage and just when she’d laid down the ultimatum of her or his career, he’d discovered his biological mother and siblings, ignoring her once again in favor of others.
With Rachel’s death so fresh, he needed Charlotte now more than ever to understand that he wasn’t pushing her aside, he needed her to stand by his.
He’d never, ever meant to hurt her and he knew this was only the beginning of a very long, very emotional process for both of them. And, yes, he was going down this path to fight for the marriage he was so desperately clinging to and he was going to drag her along with him. Because he was not giving up. It may have taken a year of life-altering changes and Charlotte leaving to open his eyes, but now that he saw exactly what he stood to lose, he couldn’t move forward happily in his life without her.
If he didn’t have Charlotte, no amount of family he connected with or films he made could fill that void.
She’d counted on his leaving, counted on his turning back to his old ways. But one thing she may not be counting on, the one thing that would keep this marriage together, was the fact he loved her more than anything. He would fight for her with everything in him. And it was time to stand up and be the man, husband and now father she needed and expected him to be.
With a warm bedtime bottle, Charlotte settled onto the damask sofa in her bedroom, cradling Lily in her arms. All the while keeping her eyes on the television, which just so happened to be tuned to the channel where the Emmy Awards were being telecast. Could she help it if that’s what popped up when she switched on the TV? She’d barely spoken to Anthony since he’d left yesterday morning, but she’d watched him since he’d come onto the screen.
“I’m not watching for me,” she told Lily as she slid the bottle between her puckered lips. “I wanted you to see your uncle Anthony on TV. It’s so rare for him to be in front of the camera.”
When he walked across the lighted stage wearing a black suit with a charcoal-gray shirt and matching silk tie, Charlotte’s heart clenched. The sight of him never failed to take her breath away. His designer suit stretched across his broad shoulders and that hint of a smile he always seemed to possess gave the impression that he was plotting something and only he knew the secret. He had that same smile in bed.
Perhaps that subtle charm was the appeal that first drew her to him. That aura of mystery, those dark gray eyes that penetrated deep into her soul and left her tingling down to her toes.
As he looked into the camera and began to speak from the teleprompter, it seemed as if he was looking right at her.
She wanted something miraculous to come from these ninety days. Wanted the marriage repaired, legal guardianship of Lily and the perfect family life she’d always dreamed about. Even though she told Anthony they weren’t getting back together, she couldn’t lie to herself. She wanted him back, desperately. But not if he couldn’t change. She dreamed of the day he became the husband and father she needed him to be.
Unfortunately, dreams and reality were so far apart, they were in separate hemispheres.
And this reality—the one with the man she loved so close, yet so far—was crushing her soul and shattering her heart. But unless Anthony made a huge turnaround, she would be gone at the end of the three months.
“He really is a good man,” Charlotte told Lily, trying to force back the tears. “His priorities are just in the wrong order for this marriage to work.”
She glanced from the television to Lily, who had one pudgy hand wrapped around the bottle and another clutching her silky pink blanket. Her lids fluttered down as her little lips pulled against the nipple of the bottle.
“Don’t worry, little one,” Charlotte whispered. “He knows how important you are. He won’t let you down.”
Of that Charlotte would see to herself. Neglecting a wife was one thing, but an innocent child … simply intolerable. Though she seriously doubted Anthony would do that to Lily. He had dropped everything when Rachel had passed and gone to retrieve the baby before she could spend another minute in the hands of social workers.
He’d also nearly begged her to give him ninety days so they could make Lily a comfortable, stable home. That said a lot for a man who allowed his work to rule every part of his life. She knew there was good in him. Knew how much family meant to him. So why had he taken her for granted the past few years?
Did he have any idea how that made her feel? That constant brushing aside, as if he just assumed she’d always be around at the end of the day. Obviously, in his mind, she was no better than a faithful golden retriever.
He’d taken her loyalty for granted and she’d allowed it. By not speaking up for herself, she had to take part of the blame for this broken marriage.
Charlotte