Merry was watching him. He liked her eyes, always slightly turned up at the edges in a smile. And her mouth, wide and pink and tempting even when he shouldn’t be tempted.
He leaned back into the sofa and finished his beer.
He didn’t want to go home. He didn’t want to leave. But he shouldn’t want to kiss her, regardless. Merry was a nice girl. And he was a man no one needed to be around. Not for longer than a night. He’d learned that lesson. He knew who he was.
Merry Kade was not the kind of girl he could sleep with and then make a polite and permanent exit from her life. First of all, because she very obviously wasn’t the one-night-stand type. In fact, she seemed inclined to make friends with anyone who came within earshot, as far as he could tell. Second, because Grace would likely castrate him if he used her friend for sex, and Cole might happily hold him down to help his girlfriend out. Third, and perhaps most important, was the fact that she lived next door. Not exactly a comfortable situation even with the most open-minded of women. He’d had long-term “friends” who were happy with nothing more than casual sex, but neither he nor they had ever flaunted other lovers in each other’s faces. Not cool.
Close proximity had never come up as a problem in the past, since no women had lived in the building. He was going to have to add it to his off-limit list.
“So are you saying you never did anything stupid to get attention from boys?” he finally asked.
Merry yelped with laughter. “Me? Boys never noticed me! I was tall and awkward and into Star Wars and video games.”
“But boys love Star Wars.”
“Strangely, that love isn’t transferrable. Unless you’re the kind of girl who likes to dress up as the Jabba the Hut slave version of Princess Leia.”
Oh, yeah. He’d never been that into Star Wars, but he sure remembered that scene.
“So…just to be clear…you never dressed up like that?”
“Shane!”
“Maybe just once? For a Halloween party when you were eighteen? Work with me here.”
“Good God, it even infected cowboys in the wilds of Wyoming.”
“Hey, we had satellite dishes and VCRs. And active fantasy lives.”
Merry groaned. “No, I only dressed up as Princess Leia once, and that was the kick-ass rebel fighter Leia.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“Figures,” she sighed, then shook her head in disgust. “Wait a minute. Have you ever seen Firefly?”
“No. Is that a Star Trek thing?”
“Star Wars,” she muttered. “And no. It’s a completely awesome sci-fi series that’s like an epic space Western. You have to watch it. Have to!”
“Okay.”
“Seriously. We’ll rent the first episode one night, okay? Please?”
Shane found himself grinning wildly at her, but told himself it was probably just the beer. “Let’s do that.”
He liked this girl. Really liked her, which settled the issue. He couldn’t touch her. And he definitely couldn’t sleep with her. Not unless he wanted to live with the sure chance that at some point in the future she’d hate his guts. Even without the complication of the lawsuit, it always ended the same for him.
He couldn’t commit. Women tried to accept that, but eventually they left and made clear that he was an asshole and an immature prick. He was. There was no denying his genes.
Shane dropped his head. “Next time, let’s do that.”
Reluctantly he stood and set his empty beer bottle down. “I’d better go. I’ve got an early start tomorrow, but I’ll try to get to Providence in the evening.”
“Don’t wear yourself out. I feel guilty enough as it is.”
“It’s not a problem,” he said. And the strange thing was…it wasn’t. His goal was to make sure that Providence was never anything more than its current state: a forgotten ghost town remembered only by a few old-timers. But somehow being out there with Merry was the most relaxing thing he did all day. Knowing she was close by, even when he couldn’t see her…he liked that. He’d like it even more if she came by and bothered him as much as he’d expected her to.
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