She knew she should capture it. A first picture of father and son together. But the smile Riley plastered on his face didn’t quite reach his eyes. They were still full of worry. As for Finn? He just looked a little nervous. As if he didn’t quite know what would come next.
She snapped a few. ‘Perfect,’ she said.
Riley strapped Finn into the car. As she walked around to her side of the car, he pulled her hand and stopped her, spinning her around to face him.
‘April, I just wanted to say something.’
Her heartbeat quickened. It was starting to get dark. Collecting the things had taken a little longer than expected. It had been such a big day. One she’d never expected to be part of.
Today was a Saturday. She might have gone into work for a few hours—even though she wasn’t on duty. She’d planned on working with Jake today, but when she’d phoned and left a message for him he’d been absolutely fine. The only other thing she would have done was pick up a few things for dinner.
As it was cold she might even have stayed in her pyjamas all day and watched Christmas movies on TV. Part of her knew that if life had gone as planned, she would probably have had a little pang about not going to Riley’s drinks last night. She would have had a twinge of regret that she wouldn’t see him again. But part of that would have been reassuring.
It would have left her clear to lock away the attraction she’d been trying to ignore for the last four weeks. She could have parcelled it up in a box like a Christmas present and stored it away in a cupboard. That would have been so much simpler than any of this.
Before she had time to think, Riley slid his hand behind her waist and pulled her towards him, resting his forehead against hers.
It was so up close and personal. They were at the back of the car. Finn couldn’t see them. The temperature had dropped; their warm breath was visible in the cold air.
A wave of emotions swept through her. She’d seen a whole other side of Riley Callaghan today. There had already been a glimmer of attraction. Now, she’d seen him at his most exposed. She’d been there when he’d got the news about Finn, then met his child for the first time. It felt too big. Too much. More than she could handle right now.
Finn was adorable. He pulled at every heartstring she had. In a way she knew that she’d picked up some things that Riley might have missed. Riley would be a good father; he just had to get to know his little boy first.
Her heart flipped over. That parent relationship. The one she’d never have. The one she’d never even allowed herself to think about since she’d made her decision. For a few seconds today she’d felt...something. Even if it was only tiny. That urge to reach out to help a child in need. She pressed her lips together and tried to push all the emotions away.
She had to think about the surgery. She had to think about preparing herself. She didn’t need her heart tangled up in this mess. She had to keep it somewhere safe.
She hadn’t moved. His head was still pressed against hers.
‘Thank you,’ he whispered. ‘Thank you for coming here with me today.’
She gulped and pulled back.
‘You’re a colleague. No problem.’ Her hand brushed against a piece of paper she’d pushed into her pocket. ‘I think it’s best if you and Finn have some time to yourselves now. I’ve got a couple of numbers of friends from Isabel’s phone book. I’ll talk to them to get an idea of what she would have liked. They might want to help with the arrangements.’
A frown furrowed Riley’s brow. ‘That would be great, thank you.’ The words were pleasant but the look on his face told her something different. It was almost as if she’d just abandoned him on a cross-country hike with no provisions.
And he didn’t say another word until he dropped her back at her house.
THE THING ABOUT life throwing you a curveball meant that you didn’t always get things right. Finn was the easiest and best part of it all. Riley had heard children were resilient and Finn was still hesitant around him.
But they’d set up his room the way he wanted, hung up his clothes and established a little routine. When he’d heard Finn crying in bed one night, he’d just gone in, wrapped his arms around him and lay with him until he stopped.
He now knew that Finn hated peas, liked chicken in all forms, was also partial to sausages and tomato ketchup, and loved a kids’ TV show with spacemen. He had seven DVDs of it and Riley had watched them all with him.
The whirlwind that was Riley’s mother was a whole other matter. Thank goodness he hadn’t seen her in the flesh when he’d told her about Finn. He was pretty sure she’d had a heart attack at the other end of the phone. Of course she was driving right down. She wanted to meet her grandchild straight away. She’d asked a million questions that Riley didn’t know the answers to.
Eventually he’d told her a white lie. He told her that the social worker had recommended that he and Finn spend the first week together on their own to get used to each other. Not to overwhelm him with things. In fact, the social worker had recommended routine as soon as possible. So he’d registered Finn at school and taken him in to say hello. The headmistress had been great, suggesting he bring Finn in for a few hours in the first instance to let him find his feet.
Riley had finally managed to placate his mother by sending the picture that April had taken of them both together. She’d cried at that point. But at least it had given him some time.
What he couldn’t work out right now was how to be around April.
Since they’d picked up Finn together, she’d retreated right into herself again. She’d spoken to him about a few funeral arrangements she’d helped put together after talking to Isabel’s friends. She’d asked him to speak to Finn about a few things too. But that was it.
No closeness. No real glimmer of friendship.
Maybe it was his fault? If she’d planned her sister’s funeral, had she had to deal with other things too? Maybe empty her house, or deal with all her financial affairs. She’d seemed so knowledgeable in Isabel’s house—a place he’d felt entirely uncomfortable. She’d seemed to know exactly what Finn needed—even though she said she had no more experience of children than he had. The visit might have revived memories for her that he hadn’t considered. Was it any wonder she was keeping her distance?
The rest of the staff had been great. They’d been surprised he was still there. But the news had spread quickly, and everyone was supportive.
Finn had asked to stay at school today until lunchtime. That meant he had three hours. Hours best spent in the hospital.
He’d barely got across the doorway before someone gave him a shout. April.
‘Dr Callaghan? Can you come and assess Robert Black for me, please?’ He could see the concern on her face straight away.
He nodded and walked over quickly. Robert had been caught in an explosion. His spinal injury was severe and he was currently in neurogenic shock. This was always a crucial time for patients. Neurogenic shock happened in almost half of patients with a spinal injury above T6 in the first twenty-four hours and didn’t go away for between one to three weeks. Patients in neurogenic shock needed continual assessment of their circulation, senses and breathing abilities. Neurogenic shock could lead to organ failure.
Robert Black’s blood pressure was low, his heart rate bradycardic. His limbs were flaccid, his skin warm and flushed due to the vasodilation caused by the neurogenic shock.
Riley signalled to the nurse. ‘Connie, can you get me some atropine?’
She nodded and handed him a vial from the emergency trolley. April moved automatically