Philip checked his watch. He was looking for an excuse, she knew, and was waiting for her to let him off the hook. Fair enough, she had to admit she normally would have done so, but tonight a small, unfamiliar feeling of defiance was niggling her. She was already doing him a favour by going to the dinner. For once, he could do something for her. He hadn’t even offered to bring any of her things up from Canberra. She laughed at herself for letting that gripe surface again. ‘I need to grab my bag anyway,’ she said as she stepped back and headed down the hall, not particularly caring whether he followed.
It only took minutes to wish he hadn’t. Lucy, Charlie and Rosie’s mum were in the family room, Rosie’s mum and Philip were making stilted conversation and Lucy was being her normal extroverted self, forcing Philip to pay her some awkward attention. As for Charlie, Philip ignored the little boy who had never spoken to him despite having met him a number of times during Rosie and Philip’s trips up to Sydney. Philip, silver-tongued with statesmen, was as tongue-tied and awkward with Charlie as Charlie was mute with most of the world. Until tonight Rosie had excused her partner but that irritated feeling wasn’t abating. Couldn’t a grown man think of something to say to a little boy that only required a shake or nod of the head in response?
After a couple of minutes Rosie had had enough. Picking up her bag and kissing them all goodnight, she took Philip away, ending everyone’s discomfort. It was more confirmation that she’d been right not to move the children to Canberra.
At least, not right away.
Conversation was one-sided on the drive to the Opera House. The glass screen between the chauffeur and their seats was up and in the privacy of the back Philip delivered his thoughts as to who he would introduce her to, who he wanted her to chat to and for how long. Rosie closed her eyes momentarily and Philip laid a hand on her arm, apparently reading her thoughts, saying, ‘I know these things can be tiresome.’ Which Rosie knew he didn’t think at all so he must mean tiresome for her. ‘But you’ve always handled yourself so well.’
‘Philip, I promised you I’d come tonight and I’ll do the right thing, and I’ll do it all with my most charming smile.’ She meant it too, although it would come at some effort. The couch she’d been lamenting four days ago now seemed much the preferable option.
‘Any more thought about moving home?’
‘I don’t know what I’m going to do, the children can’t be moved right now.’
Philip sighed, drumming his fingers on his lap. ‘Rosie, you don’t look yourself, you look exhausted. And you must be missing work. Besides, you only took a leave of absence, you’re going to have to decide what to do soon.’
She wanted to argue but she gave it up and slumped a little. He was right. About some things. ‘I agree it’s been hard making the adjustment but that doesn’t mean it’s the wrong thing to do. I’m where I need to be and where I want to be. I miss work, true, but I’ll get back to it in time, just not right now. I also agree I’m tired and if I’m not glowing with happiness, it’s because I’m grieving for my brother and his wife. Those are consequences I have to deal with. It doesn’t translate into me wanting to ditch the children.’
‘You seemed to ditch Canberra easily enough.’ Rosie flinched at the hurt in his voice. He’d done his best not to show she’d hurt him before she’d gone, but she’d known it was his pride behind that because she’d left him feeling rejected.
‘I didn’t end things with you easily. Honestly, it makes me sad, but now I’ve had time apart to think, I’m pretty sure we’d run our course. I said it was better to call it off because I didn’t want to be making promises I couldn’t keep. And I think I was right.’ She was distracted for a moment as she saw they’d arrived at the Opera House and had pulled into the queue of chauffeur-driven cars which, one by one, were depositing their passengers at the foot of the red-carpeted stairs up to the white-sailed building. ‘And you were also clear you couldn’t move with me. So there was no other reasonable alternative.’
He didn’t answer her, just gave a sharp nod of the head. It was her turn to lay a hand on his arm, stroking the expensive fabric of his suit jacket lightly. ‘I know you’re hurt that I left, but in the interests of us salvaging our friendship, can you accept this is what I had to do?’
‘I’m no good with children.’ Was he explaining why he hadn’t been able to consider moving with her? Or attempting a long-distance relationship? It sounded like an explanation. Perhaps it was?
‘I’m not asking you to be.’ Not strictly true, she’d deliberately tested him tonight when she’d invited him in and he’d struggled. ‘But that’s what my life is now. Quite frankly, I don’t know what shape things are going to take, but the children will be a central part no matter what.’
The car was pulling up in front of the steps, the door was opened for them and Philip emerged first, waiting to help Rosie out of the car. He might be cross with her, because she’d let him down and hurt him, but with Philip that would be no reason not to keep up appearances. How had he explained her absence so far from any number of functions in Canberra? After being an established couple over the last couple of years, did anyone even know they were separated?
Rosie allowed him to escort her into the function room. Philip kept her close and Rosie knew why. He liked to make an entrance and they made a striking couple: she was five foot ten in bare feet and Philip was several inches taller, so their height alone made people notice them. In politics, being noticed was part of the game if you wanted to climb to the top.
Rosie knew she was an asset in this regard. She’d never minded, it was the way the world worked, but now she questioned that assumption—had she just begun thinking like that because she’d been so fully immersed in that world? Maybe the rest of the world didn’t function so superficially?
She scanned the already crowded room and realised it wasn’t fair, not entirely. There were plenty of familiar faces and among them were some people she’d always enjoyed seeing, it wasn’t all rubbing shoulders for the sake of it. Tonight, though, pleasant people or not, it wasn’t where she wanted to be. She’d promised Philip she’d mingle cheerfully, but for the life of her she couldn’t imagine having anything of interest to contribute. When had she last managed to read the weekend papers when the news wasn’t already three days old?
For now, though, she waited dutifully next to Philip in the line to meet the Australian Prime Minister and his New Zealand counterpart. Rosie towered over the Australian PM but, then, so did most people. He remembered meeting her before, a fact which clearly pleased Philip. Maybe this would give her some bonus points and allow her to sneak off from her ‘official’ duties a bit earlier.
Philip introduced her to the minister for education and his wife before excusing himself. The minister was a rather dull man, his wife even more so, and she knew she’d been delivered to them to pay Philip’s dues without him having to endure them. After a few minutes she made her own excuses and made her way to the minister for health, collecting a glass of white wine along the way. The health minister was also someone Philip wanted her to talk to but at least he was interesting. He’d been a doctor in his pre-government life so they’d be able to find some common ground.
She was here.
Nick had noticed her the moment she’d entered the room. In a room filled wall to wall with ageing men in black suits and women wearing predominantly safe little black dresses, Rosie shone like a star in her canary-yellow dress.
Her shoulder-length sandy-blonde hair had been pinned back from her face and with her summer tan she looked beautiful,