In this book, I show you how and why EQ and soft skills are both commercial and strategic. EQ has been used to explain why people with average IQs outperformed those with the highest IQs 70 percent of the time. EQ has become part of the business vernacular, but too often it is dismissed as either simply jargon or too much in the realm of psychology. But in my judgment, EQ is more than charisma or personality. It is exhibited in adaptability, collegiality, and empathy.
Early in your career, you will quickly discover that you, like all your colleagues, are smart and hard working. Interpersonal skills are vital to distinguishing yourself at the beginning of your career. Understanding your firm's culture and incorporating it into your behavior are other keys to getting ahead. Other important considerations at the beginning of your professional services career include communicating with your boss, networking, and finding mentors and sponsors. All of these form the foundation for what I call the magic formula of ability, opportunity, and courage.
When serving clients in the second phase of your career, trust and likeability are more powerful than having encyclopedic knowledge or knowing complex equations. It is important but difficult to build relationships and turn those relationships into revenue. You will need to master the arts of creating insight out of information and using your time wisely.
The third career phase involves leading people and building teams. This book provides evidence and examples of how to better engage and motivate knowledge workers. It explains what makes a good boss and a great leader. In today's business world, a leader needs to both anticipate and adapt to changes in technology, demographics, and volatility.
The measure of this book's success will be how well it changes your mindset and, more importantly, your behavior. My goal is to give you useful tools that will help you build a satisfying and successful career.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
This book reflects the impact of many people throughout my life and career. First, my parents had a powerful and positive influence on my life. My mom and dad instilled in me a deep respect for faith, education, and teamwork. I will forever be grateful for their guidance and sacrifice.
I also would like to thank the people who contributed to my career success, who taught me the ropes and showed me how to do first-class business in a first-class way. Their contributions to my professional progress were noteworthy and invaluable. Parker Gilbert was my model of integrity and financial judgment and a very loyal friend. Griff Sexton was the first person I met at Morgan Stanley and was my mentor throughout my career.
Special thanks to Morgan Stanley Chairman and CEO James Gorman and President Colm Kelleher. Both have shown themselves to be exemplary leaders of the firm through the exceedingly difficult transition period in the wake of the financial crisis. Their relentless focus on strategy, shareholder value, and cost has allowed Morgan Stanley to reshape its business model while maintaining a premiere client franchise in the investment banking industry.
This book would not have been possible without the support and encouragement of my wife, Barbara, and my children, Dan, Kevin, and Kate. As a seasoned publishing industry expert, Kate and her insights were especially valuable throughout the process.
Credit is most definitely due to the person who did so much to make this book come to life: Diana Giddon. Words cannot express my appreciation for her professional advice and her persistence and assistance in editing and polishing the manuscript. She knows the subject matter very well, as she is a consultant to professional services firms and a former investment banker.
Several individuals read the entire manuscript and offered their thoughtful comments on it. Cory Spencer not only offered helpful comments on the manuscript but was instrumental in suggesting the format and creating the basic outline. Others who earned my appreciation are my sister, Kate Raab, Lenore Pott, Ken Pott, Bob Hallinan, Peg Sullivan, Mary Clare Delaney, Jennifer Zimmerman, Rebecca Tyson, Erika Gruppo, David Darst, Daisy Dowling, Emily Rosenfield Magid, Lauren Garcia Belmonte, Felicity Tan, Ching-Ching Chen, Levi Malik, Vanessa Capodanno, Sarah Philips, Jessica Zoob, and Alison Kittrell.
The team from John Wiley & Sons has been outstanding from start to finish. Pamela van Giessen, Bill Falloon, Meg Freeborn, and Laura Gachko were essential in creating and polishing this book and all of them have my respect and gratitude.
PART 1
NAVIGATING YOUR CAREER (HOW TO MANAGE YOURSELF)
CHAPTER I
WHAT IS THERE OTHER THAN BRAINS AND HARD WORK?
Have you ever wondered if you are your firm's best-kept secret? Do you wonder if brains and hard work are enough for you to succeed and get ahead at your firm?
When I started as an investment banker in 1974, I believed that brains and hard work were what got me a position at Morgan Stanley. On the first day of work, it took me about 10 minutes to realize that the woman to my right was smarter than I was and the man to my left was working harder than I was. I thought, “Oh no – there is no way I am smarter than that woman, and I can't work at that guy's pace. I might be toast.”
I concluded that there must be something else to distinguish beyond the brains and hard work that got me (and everyone else) the job. The emotional intelligence quotient, or EQ, card was the only and the best that I could play.
I learned about EQ both by being part of a big family and by working with really bright people in the Navy. I grew up in a family of 10 children in Sparta, Wisconsin. I quickly learned how to listen. I became adaptable by relating to my siblings, who were different ages and had different interests. My parents were schoolteachers as young adults. They each taught eight grades in one-room country schoolhouses in rural Wisconsin. My parents taught us to work as a team to get things done in our home.
After graduating from Marquette University, I joined the U.S. Navy and served as an officer for five years on the nuclear energy staff of Admiral Rickover.
My first month in the Navy was very similar to my first month at Morgan Stanley. I realized that to survive and thrive, I needed more than brain power alone. By being friendly, asking and offering to help others, and creating a network, I was able to solve problems more quickly and put issues in perspective. This same approach proved effective later as I started in a professional services firm.
Early in my career, I saw how EQ (or the lack of it) was more powerful than IQ. For example, we had been trying hard to win a mergers-and-acquisitions (M&A) mandate from the Walt Disney Company. After a number of attempts, we finally persuaded the CEO of Disney to visit Morgan Stanley's New York headquarters. The head of our mergers-and-acquisitions division said we should put our most brilliant M&A banker in charge of the meeting – let's call him Bill.
Bill ordered up reams of analyses and created a huge presentation of M&A ideas, giving the CEO his best ideas. The CEO disliked all of Bill's ideas and said that he had his own pet acquisition idea, which he had not discussed with any other bankers. After the CEO told Bill his specific target and plan, Bill looked at the CEO with a straight face and asked, “Now why would you do a Mickey Mouse thing like that?”
The CEO turned red in the face, stood up, and left our building. Anyone with an ounce of EQ would have known better than to make a sarcastic remark about the icon of the potential client's company. Bill might have been very good at analyzing acquisitions, but he was a total dunce when it came to EQ.
CHAPTER II
EMOTIONAL QUOTIENT (EQ)
Why do people with average IQs outperform those with the highest IQs? In his book, Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ, Dr. Daniel Goleman, an expert on brain and behavioral sciences, addresses