As you learn to reduce the flow of incoming information into the brain (more about this in Chapter 8), you may start to notice that a considerable gap exists between how you think things are, or how you wish they were, and how they actually are (see Figure 2-1). In order to be a mindful leader, it’s useful to consciously ‘mind the gap’. The thoughts we think are not necessarily facts, but our brain often responds as if they are.
© John Wiley & Sons, Inc.
FIGURE 2-1: Mind the gap.
Mindful leaders learn to observe thoughts as simply mental processes that come and go without knee-jerk reactions.
❯❯ See whether you can start to consciously ‘mind the gap’ in your daily life. Remember: you control your thoughts – your thoughts shouldn’t control you!
❯❯ Practice treating thoughts simply as mental processes that come and go rather than facts.
❯❯ See whether you can notice how thoughts can evoke strong emotions or sensations in the body.
❯❯ When you notice your thoughts spiralling down and depressive or negative thinking creeping in, take three minutes to do the three-step breathing space (see Chapter 10) to help you retain your equilibrium and consider things from a more objective viewpoint.
Gaining a sense of completion can be a good way to diffuse stress.
At work, one task or project can easily merge into another, giving you the feeling that you’re on a never-ending treadmill and are achieving nothing. The truth of the matter is that you’ve probably achieved a lot during the day; you have just failed to register a sense of completion.
❯❯ Break down complex or lengthy tasks into subtasks. Consciously acknowledge completion of each subtask, activating your brain’s feel-good reward circuitry.
❯❯ Pair up small tasks with larger projects or tasks. As you complete these small tasks, acknowledge how they’ve contributed to the advancement and achievement of your larger project or task.
❯❯ Celebrate each and every small win.
❯❯ At the end of each workday before you go home, pause to reflect on and consciously acknowledge all the things you’ve accomplished in the day.
Power stress, like any stress encountered over extended periods of time, makes the body susceptible to serious illness, digestive complaints and disturbed sleep patterns. It can drain your energy and capability to function and innovate.
Recovery and renewal can come from several sources. Small acts of kindness to yourself, others or even random strangers can have a hugely beneficial impact on your brain chemistry. Brain scans have revealed that even imagining an act of kindness, using virtual reality technology, can have the same positive impact on the brain as doing it for real.
Prioritise time to do things that you love doing that you may have stopped doing because you became ‘too busy’. Go dancing, do stand-up comedy, go to the theatre, or just enjoy quality time with friends, family or pets. This time will help you to reduce stress and renew yourself, making you fitter to lead.
Understanding that Mindfulness Is Not a Panacea for All Ills
Consider the following conversation:
Sally: We’ve got a problem with Jim’s leadership style. He’s insensitive to the emotional needs of his team and thinks they should just ‘get on with it’; his staff are feeling bullied.
Bill: So are we going to sort out the bullying?
Sally: No. We’ll make Jim take a mindfulness course so he gets better at controlling his emotions.
Mindfulness alone is unlikely to fix systemic workplace or personality problems. In the same way that you can’t force someone to lose weight by giving them a Weight Watchers membership, behavioural change can only occur if leaders are willing to rewire their brain by engaging in the exercises with curiosity, self-compassion and discipline.
For a rare few, unexpected effects sometimes surface when they explore their experience by using mindfulness exercises. A lot of people keep themselves distracted and busy as a way of coping, maybe because they’re afraid to look closely at their experience, so shining a light on emotions and bodily sensations during mindfulness exercises may bring up feelings of anxiety or even panic.
Natural emotional responses can be pleasant, unpleasant or neutral. This doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong but may indicate that you need to explore your unpleasant emotions in an especially safe and compassionate way, particularly if they involve feelings of dissociation and enduring discomfort. This means seeking the advice of your doctor, occupational health team, or, if you have one, your mindfulness teacher.
The mindfulness meditation exercises aren’t meant to be relaxing, but nor are they intended to cause unnecessary alarm or discomfort. If that is your experience, pull back from the edge of discomfort and seek professional support where you can discuss these side effects.
For a small minority, exercises that place focus on the breath may be disturbing, especially if you’ve had a history of breathing difficulties, asthma or panic attacks. If the latter or exercises involving breathing are a concern for you, seek medical support from your doctor and consider getting a mindfulness teacher. If you still want to explore the exercise, you can make the point of focus the sensations in your feet rather than the sensations of breath.
If you have a history of depression, alcohol or drug abuse, psychotic episodes, PTSD or any other clinical issues, you should check with your doctor before engaging with these exercises. If in doubt, pay attention to your concerns and check with your doctor. This advice is the same as if you had acute asthma and wanted to train to run a marathon – you’d be wise to seek medical and professional support first.
Chapter 3
Harnessing the Neuroscience of Mindful Leadership
IN THIS CHAPTER
Discovering the potential and limitations of your brain
Becoming conscious of your unconscious
Recognising your hidden drivers
Exploring how mindfulness works from a neurological perspective
Take much of what you know about how the best leaders operate and forget it. Much of what we ‘know’ about the best way to get things done at work is being called into question by the latest neuroscience