"Wha the deil are ye?" said the fat dame to poor Jeanie, whom she did not immediately recognise, "scouping about a decent house at sic an hour in the morning?"
"It was ane wanting to speak to the Laird," said Jeanie, who felt something of the intuitive terror which she had formerly entertained for this termagant, when she was occasionally at Dumbiedikes on business of her father's.
"Ane! – And what sort of ane are ye! – hae ye nae name? – D'ye think his honour has naething else to do than to speak wi' ilka idle tramper that comes about the town, and him in his bed yet, honest man?"
"Dear Mrs. Balchristie," replied Jeanie, in a submissive tone, "d'ye no mind me? – d'ye no mind Jeanie Deans?"
"Jeanie Deans!" said the termagant, in accents affecting the utmost astonishment; then, taking two strides nearer to her, she peered into her face with a stare of curiosity, equally scornful and malignant – "I say Jeanie Deans indeed – Jeanie Deevil, they had better hae ca'ed ye! – A bonny spot o' wark your tittie and you hae made out, murdering ae puir wean, and your light limmer of a sister's to be hanged for't, as weel she deserves! – And the like o' you to come to ony honest man's house, and want to be into a decent bachelor gentleman's room at this time in the morning, and him in his bed! – Gae wa', gae wa'!"
Jeanie was struck mute with shame at the unfeeling brutality of this accusation, and could not even find words to justify herself from the vile construction put upon her visit. When Mrs. Balchristie, seeing her advantage, continued in the same tone, "Come, come, bundle up your pipes and tramp awa wi' ye! – ye may be seeking a father to another wean for ony thing I ken. If it warna that your father, auld David Deans, had been a tenant on our land, I would cry up the men-folk, and hae ye dookit in the burn for your impudence."
Jeanie had already turned her back, and was walking towards the door of the court-yard, so that Mrs. Balchristie, to make her last threat impressively audible to her, had raised her stentorian voice to its utmost pitch. But, like many a general, she lost the engagement by pressing her advantage too far.
The Laird had been disturbed in his morning slumbers by the tones of Mrs. Balchristie's objurgation, sounds in themselves by no means uncommon, but very remarkable, in respect to the early hour at which they were now heard. He turned himself on the other side, however, in hopes the squall would blow by, when, in the course of Mrs. Balchristie's second explosion of wrath, the name of Deans distinctly struck the tympanum of his ear. As he was, in some degree, aware of the small portion of benevolence with which his housekeeper regarded the family at St. Leonard's, he instantly conceived that some message from thence was the cause of this untimely ire, and getting out of his bed, he slipt as speedily as possible into an old brocaded night-gown, and some other necessary garments, clapped on his head his father's gold-laced hat (for though he was seldom seen without it, yet it is proper to contradict the popular report that he slept in it, as Don Quixote did in his helmet), and opening the window of his bedroom, beheld, to his great astonishment, the well-known figure of Jeanie Deans herself retreating from his gate; while his housekeeper, with arms a-kimbo, fist clenched and extended, body erect, and head shaking with rage, sent after her a volley of Billingsgate oaths. His choler rose in proportion to the surprise, and, perhaps, to the disturbance of his repose. "Hark ye," he exclaimed from the window, "ye auld limb of Satan – wha the deil gies you commission to guide an honest man's daughter that gate?"
Mrs. Balchristie was completely caught in the manner. She was aware, from the unusual warmth with which the Laird expressed himself, that he was quite serious in this matter, and she knew, that with all his indolence of nature, there were points on which he might be provoked, and that, being provoked, he had in him something dangerous, which her wisdom taught her to fear accordingly. She began, therefore, to retract her false step as fast as she could. "She was but speaking for the house's credit, and she couldna think of disturbing his honour in the morning sae early, when the young woman might as weel wait or call again; and to be sure, she might make a mistake between the twa sisters, for ane o' them wasna sae creditable an acquaintance."
"Haud your peace, ye auld jade," said Dumbiedikes; "the warst quean e'er stude in their shoon may ca' you cousin, an a' be true that I have heard. – Jeanie, my woman, gang into the parlour – but stay, that winna be redd up yet – wait there a minute till I come down to let ye in – Dinna mind what Jenny says to ye."
"Na, na," said Jenny, with a laugh of affected heartiness, "never mind me, lass – a' the warld kens my bark's waur than my bite – if ye had had an appointment wi' the Laird, ye might hae tauld me – I am nae uncivil person – gang your ways in by, hinny," and she opened the door of the house with a master-key.
"But I had no appointment wi' the Laird," said Jeanie, drawing back; "I want just to speak twa words to him, and I wad rather do it standing here, Mrs. Balchristie."
"In the open court-yard! – Na, na, that wad never do, lass; we mauna guide ye that gate neither – And how's that douce honest man, your father?"
Jeanie was saved the pain of answering this hypocritical question by the appearance of the Laird himself.
"Gang in and get breakfast ready," said he to his housekeeper – "and, d'ye hear, breakfast wi' us yoursell – ye ken how to manage thae porringers of tea-water – and, hear ye, see abune a' that there's a gude fire. – Weel, Jeanie, my woman, gang in by – gang in by, and rest ye."
"Na, Laird," Jeanie replied, endeavouring as much as she could to express herself with composure, notwithstanding she still trembled, "I canna gang in – I have a lang day's darg afore me – I maun be twenty mile o' gate the night yet, if feet will carry me."
"Guide and deliver us! – twenty mile – twenty mile on your feet!" ejaculated Dumbiedikes, whose walks were of a very circumscribed diameter, – "Ye maun never think o' that – come in by."
"I canna do that, Laird," replied Jeanie; "the twa words I have to say to ye I can say here; forby that Mrs. Balchristie"
"The deil flee awa wi' Mrs. Balchristie," said Dumbiedikes, "and he'll hae a heavy lading o' her! I tell ye, Jeanie Deans, I am a man of few words, but I am laird at hame, as well as in the field; deil a brute or body about my house but I can manage when I like, except Rory Bean, my powny; but I can seldom be at the plague, an it binna when my bluid's up."
"I was wanting to say to ye, Laird," said Jeanie, who felt the necessity of entering upon her business, "that I was gaun a lang journey, outby of my father's knowledge."
"Outby his knowledge, Jeanie! – Is that right? Ye maun think ot again – it's no right," said Dumbiedikes, with a countenance of great concern.
"If I were ance at Lunnon," said Jeanie, in exculpation, "I am amaist sure I could get means to speak to the queen about my sister's life."
"Lunnon – and the queen – and her sister's life!" said Dumbiedikes, whistling for very amazement – "the lassie's demented."
"I am no out o' my mind," said she, "and sink or swim, I am determined to gang to Lunnon, if I suld beg my way frae door to door – and so I maun, unless ye wad lend me a small sum to pay my expenses – little thing will do it; and ye ken my father's a man of substance, and wad see nae man, far less you, Laird, come to loss by me."
Dumbiedikes, on comprehending the nature of this application, could scarce trust his ears – he made no answer whatever, but stood with his eyes rivetted on the ground.
"I see ye are no for assisting me, Laird," said Jeanie, "sae fare ye weel – and gang and see my poor father as aften as ye can – he will be lonely eneugh now."
"Where is the silly bairn gaun?" said Dumbiedikes; and, laying hold of her hand, he led her into the house. "It's no that I didna think o't before," he said, "but it stack in my throat."
Thus speaking to himself, he led her into an old-fashioned parlour, shut the door behind them, and fastened it with a bolt. While Jeanie, surprised at this manoeuvre, remained as near the door as possible, the Laird quitted her hand, and pressed upon a spring lock fixed in an oak panel in the wainscot, which instantly slipped aside. An iron strong-box was discovered in a recess of the wall;