“My goal is to not get fed to these lions after my interview,” he thought with a grin before walking bravely down the wide hallway to a meeting with his fate.
Judging by the view that opened up, fate had some very nice things to offer. Ontius Sanery’s villa was known for its collection of ancient artifacts from distant lands. Visitors called it a museum, but it also reminded them of a heap of trophies lying on the battlefield, awaiting distribution to various warriors. Not that the villa’s owner had any intention of sharing out his richly colored paintings from Mustobrim or his metal basins from Arincil, each large enough to fit a small bull. It was rumored that after victorious battles, the Arincils used these basins to bathe in their enemies’ still-hot blood. Uni wondered fleetingly if Sanery used them for this purpose too. A silly idea, of course, but he wouldn’t be surprised if Margio or Forsey did.
A servant slowly opened the elaborately carved wooden door at the end of the hall. Uni immediately recognized the style as coming from Torgendam. “It must be made of Karanham oak. How on earth did they bring it all this way?”
“The aspiring nobleman Enel Virando!” rang out by his ear. Uni jumped. He realized he had already been promoted two levels in the Empire’s convoluted system of ranks.
There was a scraping sound in the room, and the servant moved aside so that Uni could approach his new superior. I’m going to have to work with this man day and night for at least six months, so I need to get off on the right foot with him.
The man seated at the low table in front of Uni had small, unpleasant features, and his face was stretched out like the reflection in a cheap mirror. In a grating voice, he informed his visitor that he might approach.
“What a diplomat!” Uni thought. “I suppose I was naïve to think that they were all pleasant and charming.”
“You may take a seat,” the man said without looking up from the papers in his hand. “I am reading your background. None of it makes any sense. The fools in the chancery have messed everything up again.” He glanced up at Uni in annoyance. “Why don’t you tell me a little about yourself instead?”
“About myself? There isn’t much to tell.” Uni was beginning to feel like this whole meeting was a waste of time. “I was born in the capital in the year of the Heavenly Era 379. I graduated from the Imperial Academy with a degree in literature and started working at His Majesty’s archive as an assistant master in the department of foreign manuscripts…”
“I don’t need to hear all the useless details. If that’s how you plan to interpret for me, I can tell you right away that I don’t need an interpreter like that.”
Something in Uni snapped. “Is that so? Tell me what kind of interpreter you need and I’ll run outside and get him.” For a second, he was stunned by his own insolence.
“Young man, I think you have forgotten where you are! I have to wonder at whoever raised you. Surely you understand that civility is of the utmost importance for a diplomat.” The man kept his head down, perusing Uni’s record. “Aha! My instinct was correct. I see here that you had no one to teach you how to behave.” He shook his head. “No father. Such a pity.” Then he looked up and blinked. “Who was your father, anyway? Do you even know?”
“My father was a warrior,” Uni shot back. “He was killed on the northern border protecting disrespectful but highly placed officials from the barbarians. They were the same kind of officials that now try teaching good manners to his son.” The man’s mouth was hanging open at this point. Without pausing for breath, Uni went on. “I may be your interpreter, but that does not make me your servant. And consider this: you have much more to lose than I do. If something goes wrong, you’re the one who will answer for it. Have I made myself clear?”
Great Sun! He thought. Did I really just say that? I must be losing my mind. He’ll grind me into dust for that. I’m a fool! A complete, unteachable fool!
Instantly sobered by fear, Uni tensed his body and waited to see what his punishment would be. The man leaned forward and gripped the edge of the table until his fingers went white, but the result of Uni’s impulsivity was not what he had expected.
The older man twisted his mouth into what passed for a smile. “You must forgive me, Enel Virando! I apologize if I spoke harshly of your honorable parents. Let us continue our discussion in harmony. Would you mind answering a few more questions?”
It worked! Uni thought, and his muscles began to relax. “Of course,” he replied, sounding charitable. “That was the purpose of my visit to your lovely residence,” he added to soften the effects of his offensive.
“Wonderful. Let’s see, we’ve cleared up the issue of your father. Your mother, Sevelia Virando, is the fortunate owner of the Happy Trout tavern, am I correct?
“Yes. Only it is not a tavern, but an inn,” Uni replied. “One of the nicer inns in the capital,” he added.
“Of course, I apologize. Now let’s see…ah, your reputation. A sensitive issue. A diplomat must be able to control himself in any situation. Remember that you are not representing yourself, but the entire country and our Heavenly Leader. Do you understand?”
“I’m not sure what you are driving at.”
The man winced. “I’ll be less vague. Do you enjoy drinking?”
“Do I look like I do?”
“I’m certainly no specialist in that area,” the man replied with dignity. “But it says here that you have a habit of drinking and carousing. That,” he looked up, “is catastrophic for a diplomat.”
“The Emperor is already aware of what you call my ‘carousing’.”
“Is that so?” The man’s face grew longer. “What did he say?”
“He sent me here to meet you.”
“I see. Well, I have to say your experience is pretty thin, too. You’ve never been part of a diplomatic mission. That’s bad. And languages? How well do you know Virilan?”
“I have a letter of recommendation from the senior master of the foreign manuscripts department, Enel Barko. He is the Empire’s foremost specialist on Virilan.”
The man brightened. “Ah, a recommendation. That’s better. Let’s see it.” He unrolled the scroll Uni handed him. “Well informed, extensive vocabulary, capable of conversation, my best and only student…” He frowned. “That’s all well and good, but where is the seal of the archive? My dear boy, you’re applying for a very important job and here you’ve skipped one of the most important procedures!”
“Does Enel Ronko’s word carry no weight with you? And the Emperor’s personal request?”
“Yes, of course, but I can’t put this in your file without a seal. I’m sure you understand. Even our Heavenly Lord, may the Bright Deity give him health and happiness for years without end, has been known to change his mind about things. Paper, my boy, is more reliable…”
“Do you really think I am trying to fool you?”
“Not at all,” the man spluttered. “I just need you to understand that this business is not as simple as it might seem to an outsider. Administrative procedures are tiresome, but they do matter. You don’t expect me to run around putting seals on documents, do you?”
“If that’s all that you need, I’ll do it myself. Just tell me exactly what is required.”
“Now you’re starting to understand. It won’t be difficult at all, especially since I’ve taken a liking to you – a nice young man who grew up without a father and made his own way in life. I’d hate to ask you to run around stamping documents. If you’re prepared to compensate the administrative costs, then…”
Uni nearly leaped from his seat.