Chapter IX
When Hindley arrived, I tried to conceal little Hareton, because his father might kiss him to death or to throw in the fire. But he saw me, and took the child from me.
Poor Hareton was squalling and kicking in his father's arms with all his might, and redoubled his yells when he carried him upstairs and lifted him over the banister. As I reached them, Hindley leant forward on the rails to listen to a noise below. He almost forgot what he had in his hands.
'Who is that?' he asked, hearing the footsteps.
It was Heathcliff; and, at the instant when my eye quitted Hareton, he gave a sudden spring, delivered himself from the careless grasp that held him, and fell. Heathcliff arrived underneath just at the critical moment and caught the boy. But his face changed when he realized he had saved his enemy's son.
I preferred to die than give the baby in Mr. Earnshaw's hands again. He laughed and poured himself a drink. Some minutes later, I was rocking Hareton on my knee, and humming a song, when Miss Cathy, who had listened to the hubbub from her room, put her head in, and whispered,
'Are you alone, Nelly?'
'Yes, Miss,' I replied.
She entered and approached the hearth. I supposed she was going to say something, and looked up. The expression of her face seemed disturbed and anxious. Her lips were half asunder, she drew a breath; but it escaped in a sigh instead of a sentence. I resumed my song.
'Where's Heathcliff?' she said, interrupting me.
'He is working in the stable,' was my answer.
There followed another long pause.
'Oh, dear!' she cried at last. 'I'm very unhappy!'
'A pity,' observed I. 'You're hard to please; so many friends and so few cares, and can't make yourself content!'
'Nelly, will you keep a secret for me? I want to know what I to do. Today, Edgar Linton has asked me to marry him, and I have agreed. Now was I wrong?'
'There are many things to be considered before that question can be answered properly.
It all seems smooth and good, Miss Cathy, why are you sad? Where is the obstacle?'
'Here! and here!' replied Catherine, striking one hand on her forehead, and the other on her breast: 'in whichever place the soul lives. In my soul and in my heart, I'm convinced I'm wrong!'
'That's very strange! I cannot understand.'
'Nelly, do you never dream queer dreams?' she said, suddenly, after some minutes' reflection.
'Yes, now and then,' I answered.
'And so do I. I've dreamt that I was in Heaven. But Heaven did not seem to be my home; and I broke my heart with weeping to come back to earth. That will explain my secret. I've no more business to marry Edgar Linton than I have to be in heaven. If the wicked man here did not humiliate Heathcliff… It will degrade me to marry Heathcliff now; so he will never know how I love him: and that, not because he's handsome, Nelly, but because he's more myself than I am. Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same; and Linton's is as different as frost from fire.'
When this speech ended, I became sensible of Heathcliff's presence. I noticed a slight movement, turned my head, and saw him rise from the bench. He went out noiselessly. He listened. Catherine says it will degrade her to marry him! Then he stayed to hear no further.
'Oh, I'm not going to forget Heathcliff! That's not what I intend,' Cathy continued, 'I will be Mrs. Linton. Edgar must shake off his antipathy, and tolerate him, at least. He will, when he learns my true feelings towards him. Nelly, I see now you think me a selfish wretch. But if Heathcliff and I are married, we will be beggars. Whereas, if I marry Linton I can aid Heathcliff to rise, and place him out of my brother's power.'
'With your husband's money, Miss Catherine? I think that's the worst motive of yours.'
'It is not,' retorted she; 'it is the best!'
She paused, and hid her face in the folds of my gown; but I jerked it forcibly away. I was out of patience with her folly!
'If I can make any sense of your nonsense, Miss,' I said, 'it only goes to convince me that you are ignorant of the duties you undertake in marrying; or else that you are a wicked, unprincipled girl. But trouble me with no more secrets: I'll not promise to keep them.'
'You'll keep that?' she asked, eagerly.
'No, I'll not promise,' I repeated.
She was about to insist, when the entrance of Joseph finished our conversation. Catherine removed her seat to a corner, and nursed Hareton, while I made the supper.
In the evening she wanted to talk to Heathcliff, but he was not at home. Night fell, however, Catherine was not tranquil. She was wandering to and fro, from the gate to the door, in a state of agitation.
About midnight, while we still sat up, the storm came over the Heights in full fury. There was a violent wind, as well as thunder, and either one or the other split a tree off at the corner of the building. Heathcliff had disappeared since the evening. One day, I had the misfortune, when she had provoked me exceedingly, to lay the blame of his disappearance on her. From that period, for several months, she ceased to hold any communication with me. Joseph fell under a ban also. Catherine felt ill, she was pale, and cross, and sad. The doctor says that she won't bear much. Her brother, meanwhile, wished earnestly to see her bring honour to the family by an alliance with the Lintons! Edgar Linton was infatuated and believed himself the happiest man alive on the day he led her to Gimmerton Chapel, three years subsequent to his father's death.
Much against my inclination, I was persuaded to leave Wuthering Heights and accompany her here. Little Hareton was nearly five years old, and I had just begun to teach him his letters. We made a sad parting; but Catherine's tears were more powerful than ours.
Chapter X
Mr. Heathcliff has just honoured me with a call. About seven days ago he sent me a brace of grouse – the last of the season. Scoundrel! He is not altogether guiltless in this illness of mine; and I wanted to tell him about it. But, alas! How can I offend a man who was charitable enough to sit at my bedside and talk on some other subject than treatment? This is quite an easy interval. I am too weak to read; yet I feel as if I can enjoy something interesting. Why not let Mrs. Dean finish her tale? I'll ring: she'll be delighted to find me capable of talking cheerfully.
I got Miss Catherine and myself to Thrushcross Grange, she continued; and, to my agreeable disappointment, she behaved infinitely better than I dared to expect. She seemed almost over-fond of Mr. Linton. Even to his sister she showed plenty of affection. They were both very attentive to her comfort, certainly.
On one mellow evening in September, I was coming from the garden with a heavy basket of apples which I was gathering. I set my burden on the house-steps by the kitchen door, when I heard a voice behind me say,
'Nelly, is that you?'
It was a deep voice, and foreign in tone; yet there was something in the manner which made it sound familiar. I turned around. I saw a man. A ray fell on his features; the cheeks were sallow, and half covered with black whiskers; the brows lowering, the eyes deep-set and singular.
I remembered the eyes. It was Heathcliff.
'Yes, it is me, Heathcliff,' he said, glancing from me up to the windows. 'Are they at home? Where is she? Nelly, you are not glad! You needn't be so disturbed. Is she here? Speak! I want to have one word with her – your mistress. Go, and say some person from Gimmerton desires to see her.'
'How will she take it?[9]' I exclaimed. 'What will she do? The surprise bewilders me – it will put her out of her head! And you are Heathcliff! But altered! I can't understand. Were you in the army?'
'Go