The Colors Of A Optimistic World. Logan J. Davisson. Читать онлайн. Newlib. NEWLIB.NET

Автор: Logan J. Davisson
Издательство: Bookwire
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Жанр произведения: Сделай Сам
Год издания: 0
isbn: 9783748513315
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from low self-esteem. Possible reasons cited are that women, unlike men, make their self-esteem more dependent on the outside world. They tend not to assess their abilities and characteristics realistically. The reason for this is that women always compare themselves with an ideal and not with competitors or other people. Added to this is the often unconscious attitude towards women to adapt and to be responsible for the happiness of children and men. Combined with their own self-critical attitude and the daily tension between career and family, many women experience problems with their own self-esteem. In extreme cases, a certain tendency to fall ill with a shopping addiction cannot be ruled out. However, even men may have problems with their self-esteem due to a dominant mother, childhood bullying or family tensions. For example, men cannot be excluded in principle if one speaks of a probability of falling ill with shopping addiction.

      The psychological causes of addiction to shopping can therefore be quite varied: genetics, personality, neurobiological processes in the brain that favour it, mental illnesses or stress caused either by everyday life or by strokes of fate. Why, for example, a lack of self-esteem or neurobiological processes in the brain can lead to shopping addiction, will be briefly explained at this point.

      Lack of self-esteem

      Since self-esteem has been mentioned several times, the causes and, above all, the consequences and possible connection with shopping addiction will be examined more closely at this point. Psychologically, self-esteem is the value that an individual ascribes to himself. In other words, self-esteem can be understood as the evaluation one gives oneself. Self-esteem is often referred to as self-respect, self-confidence or self-confidence, but it is not entirely correct. Self-confidence and self-assurance are closely linked to self-esteem, but do not have the same meaning. As a rule, self-esteem includes one's own personality, abilities, memories and feelings about oneself.

      How positive or negative your self-esteem is depends on three factors. This includes comparisons with other people, feedback from the environment and the principle of self-observation. In self-observation, one's own behaviour and experience is analysed and classified. As a rule, it is set in relation to previous events and is central to one's own self-perception. In the course of life, the formation of self-esteem concentrates primarily on social comparisons and is repeatedly called into question by school changes or other upheavals. Puberty would be a fitting example of such an "identity crisis". But even the change from kindergarten to school is a change that can leave its first traces.

      A reduced self-esteem can primarily be traced back to a difficult childhood. However, a low self-esteem can also burn into the body over the course of a lifetime as a result of emotional injuries. While in childhood the parents are still the central figures in the life of a child, in later years this centre of life can shift and the partner can take on the central role. Disappointments from relationships are therefore a serious component that have a massive impact on self-esteem. For this it is often sufficient to have been cheated or lied to by the partner and to have destroyed the trust lastingly. Many people then ask themselves the question "why wasn't I enough for him/her" and often completely ignore that they are not solely to blame for the failure of the relationship. Fraud in relationships can be compared to a traumatic experience in which a person had to fear for his life. The psychological consequences are correspondingly far-reaching.

      If the causes lie in the childhood, it is often the lack of recognition of the parents up to indifference, an emotional neglect or the absolute opposite, overprotection and overcare. Especially children who have only been rewarded with emotional goods and not with love can be prone to shopping addiction. The rush of shopping can then serve the purpose of self-affirmation and suppress the feeling of receiving too little recognition. In childhood there was an imprint on material goods which can no longer be discarded in adulthood. For example, if a child has received a gift for good grades, the focus is on materialism. And who doesn't know from their own childhood that their parents banned video games or television as a punishment? The deprivation of material goods in childhood, like the excess, can lead to the conviction in adulthood that the focus is unnaturally placed on possessions and valuables. It has long been known that concentration on materialistic values leads to a long-term decline in quality of life. While it is essential for a happy life that basic needs are met, an accumulation of material possessions does not improve quality of life and mental well-being. It is therefore a fallacy of a shopaholic who believes that buying this garment now will make him happier. But those who concentrate on material things and put a lot of energy into shopping tours rob themselves of energy and time to take care of the central things in life.

      This feeling that material possessions lead to social acceptance and more is reinforced by the interpretation of one's own society. Material objects of value, as those affected believe, play a central role in gaining recognition and affection. If those affected receive the appropriate compliments for their acquired clothing or the latest mobile phone, they are ultimately even strengthened in this perception. The self-esteem is upgraded and the affected persons are driven further into addiction in this way. Since society is increasingly focusing on these material values, it is not unlikely that buying addiction will be more strongly represented in the coming generations than it is currently the case.

      Sooner or later, a lack of security, closeness and love often triggers an inner emptiness that is to be filled by the purchase of products. For example, those affected report that the arrival of packages ordered online gives them a childlike feeling of Christmas again. In this case, shopping addiction is a desperate attempt to restore the feeling of beautiful memories and love. The central role of the inner child also becomes clear in this description. In psychology, thoughts, feelings and experiences from childhood that can play an important role in experiencing and acting despite their advanced age are called inner children. Many shopping addicts are in a permanent conflict with their inner child, that is, in their case fear of rejection or withdrawal of love, and their adult self, which is marked by reason and a sense of responsibility. Psychotherapy is one way of ending one's own conflict with one's inner child and finding peace with childhood experiences and feelings.

      The attention and attention that the affected person receives from the seller is also a factor that should not be underestimated. The feeling of lack of attention and devotion can be compensated in this way. For this reason, the goods already purchased are not returned. Affected people report the fear that the seller's recognition and love will be lost if they return their purchase. What is particularly striking about these descriptions is the distorted perception of those affected. The salesman does his job professionally and rarely offers his customers honest feelings of recognition or even love. The longing of those affected for attention and positive attention and the deficits that are present in their own lives become clear.

      Strokes of fate

      A stroke of fate can include sudden unemployment, the death of a relative or similar stressful life situations such as separation from one's long-term partner. Studies have shown that these factors have a significant influence on self-esteem in adulthood. While, for example, a breach of trust in a partnership or marriage can lead to a loss of self-esteem and thus trigger a buying addiction, stressful life situations can be unloaded by compulsive shopping. In this case, those affected try to distract themselves from their negative feelings and problems. In these cases, there must not have been a disposition for shopping addiction in the past, but those affected experience by chance that shopping makes them easier and more joyful. Once this positive experience is made, it can happen that the positive feelings want to be experienced again and a vicious circle begins.

      The psychosocial consequences of unemployment are manifold. For example, those who suddenly become unemployed may feel excluded from society. Particularly in Germany, social recognition is often defined by the professional success of the individual. The fear of being considered lazy or poor plays a central role for many unemployed people. Another far-reaching factor for many unemployed people is the threat of poverty. The financial imbalance, which many find themselves in as a result of unemployment, leads to restrictions in purchasing behaviour to date and the abandonment of products or services that have so far met their own needs. In order to escape this feeling and compensate for it, excessive buying noise can occur. The motivation can be quite different. Some people may not want to accept that their financial possibilities are limited from now on. Or they try to drive away boredom