Longing Love. Cheryl Birch

close my eyes when i remember how angry I was at him when planning on taking me from Hong Joong. I hate both him and Hyung Jung to take me far from the person that I loved. I was told he was a drug of course, if I continued taking him I’d overdose and die.

      It sounds ridiculous but it’s true and I only realized it when i was delivered to counselling. One more thing I hated was the truth that Hyung Jung and Won Il got my children involved; I never told them I liked men because both of these hate gays, what managed to get worse was that my father’s brother is gay and both brothers aren’t speaking, mostly my dad since that he sees gays as abnormal.

      I was so scared and confided in my own uncle who advised me to remain quiet for the moment until I really could stand by myself as opposed to telling my parents than getting kicked out of our home which brought me here.

      Hong Joong was angry at me and always threatened that he’d tell my parents about me basically didn’t give him what that he wanted or disobeyed him. I was working late on a painting for an exhibit and lost monitoring of time. That same night that he visited visit my parents and the second thing I knew, I was called home and told to pack my shit and leave.

      Hong Joong was so happy and happy with himself and that’s when every thing took the incorrect turn. I moved in with him and the abuse, mentally, physically and emotionally began. So when Hyung Jung alongside Won Il contacted my parents, they weren’t cooperative initially until my sister and brother paid me a trip.

      I was refusing to consume, I appeared as if shit, I was screaming near the top of my lungs. I banged my head contrary to the walls to the stage where I fell unconscious so when I woke up, I beat the nurses and physician.

      My parents stumbled on see me in a healthcare facility which angered me in to hatred. I blamed them for kicking me out and forcing me to call home with that asshole. My mother was a crying mess and my dad had dread written around his face.

      I didn’t desire to get back to them and my uncle wanted to house me in the comfortable home that he and his boyfriend owned. I lived using them for some months, got myself in balance but I haven’t really spoken to my parents once they visited me at a medical facility.

      My siblings visit me every chance they get though and it's really comforting within an annoying way.

      I realized that after what happened between Hong Joong and me, that I don’t know very well what it certainly feels as though to be happy and in love, every thing around the finish of our split up is a lie – a lie that lasted 3 years.

      And all I'd like is usually to be loved.