The noise of Cammie’s bedtime rituals moved from the bathroom to the bedroom. Olivia walked through the door in time to see Kieran tuck his daughter into the raised bed, giving her a kiss in the process. “My turn,” she said.
Feeling awkward beneath Kieran’s steady gaze, she hugged Cammie and tucked the covers close. “Sweet dreams.”
Cammie’s eyes were already drooping. “Nite, Mommy. Nite, Kieran.” The two adults stepped into the hall. Kieran’s expression was brooding, none of the lightheartedness he’d exhibited in Cammie’s presence remaining. “Put some other shoes on,” he said. “We’re going for a walk.”
Kieran saw on her face that she recognized the blunt command for what it was.
She frowned. “When you have a child, you can’t waltz away whenever you want. She’s too small to be left alone.”
“I’m not stupid, Olivia.” Her patronizing words irritated him. “Jacob returned a little while ago. Cook is fixing him some leftovers. He’s bringing a stack of medical journals with him and has promised to sit up here until we get back.”
“I don’t know why we have to leave the house.”
“Because it’s a beautiful night and because I don’t think you want to risk having our conversation overheard.”
That shut her up. He was in a mood to brook no opposition, and the sooner he stated his piece, the better.
About the time Jacob appeared upstairs, Olivia returned wearing athletic shoes as instructed. She had changed into jeans and a long-sleeve shirt in deference to the chill of the late hour. Even in summer, nights on the mountain were cool.
They chatted briefly with Jacob, and then Kieran cocked his head toward the door. “Let’s go.”
Outside, Olivia stopped short. “You haven’t told me where we’re going.”
“To the top of the mountain.”
“I thought we were on top.”
“The house sits on a saddle of fairly level land, but at either end of the property, the peak splits into two outcroppings. One has been turned into a helipad. We’re headed to the other.”
She followed him in silence as he strode off into the darkness, deliberately keeping up an ambitious pace. If she ended up exhausted and out of breath, perhaps she wouldn’t be able to argue with him.
When the trail angled sharply upward, she called out his name. “Kieran, stop. I need to rest.”
He paused there in the woods and looked at her across the space of several feet. Her face was a pale blur in the darkness. The sound of her breathing indicated exertion.
“Can we go now?” He was determined not to show her any consideration tonight. Nothing would dissuade him from his course of judgment.
She nodded.
He spun on his heel and pressed on. They were three miles from the house when the final ascent began. “Take my hand,” he said gruffly, not willing to place her in any actual danger.
The touch of her slender fingers in his elicited emotions that were at odds with his general mood of condemnation. He pushed back the softer feelings and concentrated on his need for retribution.
Clambering over rocks and thick roots, they made their way slowly upward. At last, breaking out of the trees, they were treated to a vista of the heavens that included an unmistakable Milky Way and stars that numbered in the millions.
Despite his black mood, the scene humbled him as it always did. Every trip home he made this pilgrimage at least once. To the right, a single large boulder with a flat top worn down by millennia of wind and rain offered a seat. He drew her to sit with him. Only feet away, just in front them, the mountain plunged into a steep, seemingly endless ravine.
Olivia perched beside him, their hips touching. “Are you planning to throw me off?” she asked, daring to tease him.
“Don’t tempt me.”
“It’s a good thing I’m not afraid of heights.”
“We’ll come back in the daylight sometime. You can see for miles from up here.”
They sat in silence for long minutes. Perhaps this had been a mistake. The wild, secluded beauty of this remote mountain was chipping away at his discontent. Occasionally the breeze teased his nostrils with Olivia’s scent. All around them nocturnal creatures went about their business. Barred owls hooted nearby, their mournful sound punctuating the night.
Olivia sat quietly, her arms wrapped around her.
He rested his elbows on his knees, staring out into the inky darkness. “You committed an unpardonable sin against me, Olivia. Robbing me of my daughter—” His voice broke, and he had to take a deep, shuddering breath before he could continue. “Nothing can excuse that… no provocation, no set of circumstances.”
“I’m sorry you missed seeing her grow from a baby into a funny, smart girl.”
“But that’s not really an apology, is it? You’d do the same thing again.”
“The father of my child was a liar who abandoned me without warning or explanation. And later, when I did discover the truth, I found out what kind of man you are. An eternal Peter Pan, always searching for Neverland. Never quite able to settle down to reality.”
“You think you have me all figured out.”
“It’s not that hard. All I have to do is look at the stamps on your passport.”
“Traveling the world is not a crime.”
“No, but it’s an inherently selfish lifestyle. I’ll admit that your work is important, but those bridges you build have also created unseen walls. You’ve never had to answer to anyone but yourself. And you like it that way.”
The grain of truth in her bald assessment stung. “I might have made different choices had I known about Cammie.”
“Doubtful. You were hardly equipped to care for a baby. And by your own admission, you’ve returned to Wolff Mountain barely a handful of times in six years. You may feel like the wronged party in this situation, Kieran, but from where I’m standing, both of our lives played out as they had to—separate… unrelated.”
He couldn’t let go of the sick regret twisting his insides with the knowledge that he had never been allowed to hold his infant child. “You call me selfish, Olivia, but you like playing God, controlling all the shots. That hardly makes you an admirable character in this scenario.”
“I did what was necessary to survive.”
“Lucky for you, your parents had money.”
“Yes.”
“Because, otherwise, you’d have been forced to come crawling to me, and that would have eaten away at your pride.”
“I would never have come to you for money.”
He pounded his fists on his knees. “Damn you. Do you know how arrogant you sound?”
“Me? Arrogant?” Her voice rose. “That’s rich. You wrote the book, Kieran. All you do is throw your weight around. I won’t apologize for protecting my daughter from an absentee father.”
“Military families deal with long absences all the time and their children survive.”
“That’s true. But those kids suffer. Sometimes they cry themselves to sleep at night wishing with all their hearts that their mommy or daddy was there to tuck them in.