It was one year ago she’d miscarried, and holding on to Lily brought all of those painful memories to the surface.
Charlotte stared down at the baby as tears gathered in her eyes. The thought that Rachel would never see Lily take her first steps, never see her off to school or marry one day really hit home. Charlotte had wanted all those things and more with the baby she’d lost. But fate had brought her and Lily together for a reason.
“You okay?”
Anthony moved in behind her, placing a warm hand on the small of her back. It would be so easy to lean on him right now, but where would that get her? For now she was alone with her emotions.
“It’s just a lot to take in,” she whispered. “Being back here, Lily, Rachel’s death.”
“I know.”
His voice, thick with his own emotion, pulled at her. She’d never once, in all their nine years of marriage, seen him show this kind of emotion. Other than expressing his love for her, he’d never opened up, shown her anything deeper that would make him appear vulnerable. Anthony Price was too proud, too strong to let anyone, including his wife, think he was less than perfect at all times.
Like the time his world was flipped upside down nearly a year ago when he’d discovered the truth about his adoption. He’d been thrown into a family just as famous as he, and he hadn’t sought her out for guidance, comfort or even to talk. He’d shut her down once again and slid just one more thing between the two of them, sending her back one more slot on his priority list.
And then his sister had died. Now was not the time to go into all the reasons working on this marriage was a bad idea.
“I’m sorry about Rachel.” She turned, looked at him through teary eyes. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there for the funeral, but I just … I couldn’t be.”
Anthony nodded. “I understand. It’s more important that you’re here now. For Lily.”
For Lily? Charlotte doubted that was the main reason he wanted her here, but helping with the baby was all he was getting from her. Her heart couldn’t afford any more emotional beatings.
“She sleeps a lot.” Anthony smiled down at his niece. “Is that normal?”
“For her age it is. They generally nap about twice a day, so she’s fine. Her world has been disrupted and I’m sure she’s noticed that things aren’t the same. We just have to try to keep her life on some type of regular schedule. That’s best for babies.”
“You’re good for her,” Anthony said, looking back up into her eyes. “And me.”
No comment was necessary. What could she say? A baby didn’t change a thing. He’d warned her that he would try to get her back during these next few months, which meant she had to totally steel herself against his charms. And since she’d been married to him for the past nine years, she pretty much knew every angle he would work.
Charlotte took in the room’s soft, delicate toile decor and laid Lily in her sleigh crib. The chandelier mobile overhead would be a beautiful sight for her to wake up to. Charlotte only hoped the child got used to the strange surroundings and adjusted quickly.
She also hadn’t missed the fact that one of her paintings of little girls playing in a field hung just over the rocking chair. She wondered if Anthony had asked the designers to hang the piece that had been in another spare bedroom.
Turning toward Anthony, she put a finger to her lips for him to be quiet and slipped from the room. Once in the hallway, she smiled. “The room is gorgeous. Did you use Hannah again?”
“Who else? I hope you don’t mind I moved the painting. I told her you would want it in there.”
Charlotte couldn’t help the “aww” moment that just moved through her. That warmth of such a simple gesture had her wishing their welcoming a baby into the house was under different circumstances.
Anthony moved down the hall toward the master suite. “Come in here so we can talk.”
Charlotte balked at his commanding tone. For once couldn’t the man ask something? Everything was always on his terms, his way.
Nonetheless, she entered the room they’d shared for years, the room they’d made love in countless times. Her body responded, but she tamped down any desire she had. She could not give in to Anthony, no matter how much she missed his touch.
Her eyes darted to the canopy bed with gold sheers that draped and puddled on the white carpet around the four-poster. He hadn’t changed a thing in the three months since she’d been gone. Even their wedding picture still sat on the bedside table … on his side of the bed. She couldn’t help but wonder what he thought when he looked at it.
Charlotte stared at the young couple—a dashing groom and a glowing bride. Recognition was scarce, though. That couple didn’t exist anymore and Charlotte almost wanted to go back and have a do-over—knowing what she did now. Maybe if she’d been more forthright about her feelings, made Anthony open up about everything he kept bottled inside, they wouldn’t be in the midst of an inevitable divorce.
But only in movies did people have that second scene to get things right.
Everything in her heart, her soul, wished they’d gotten it right the first time around. She couldn’t turn off her love, but maybe in time she could learn to live with that ever-pressing weight on her shattered heart.
“Tell me you don’t feel anything being here with me,” Anthony whispered, moving close to her. “I know you feel the same thing I do when we step into this room. We’ve never been able to keep our hands off each other and now is no exception.”
Charlotte held up a hand, because God help her if he touched her, all her resolve would go out the window and she needed to be strong. For once she was going to put herself first.
“What I feel, or what you feel, for that matter, is irrelevant. The problem is your affair with your career, never opening up to me and always assuming money will buy happiness … mainly mine.”
“You seemed happy for a long time, Charlotte. I honestly don’t know what changed and why you distanced yourself.” His eyes roamed over her face, to her lips then back to her eyes. “Besides, that money is what has helped you with your children’s charity.”
So he had no clue why she’d started distancing herself. That proved all the more how self-absorbed he’d been.
“My charity was built up with donations, fundraisers and a lot of hard work,” she retorted.
“Yes, but it was the Price name that got you where you are.”
Fury bubbled within her. “Are you insinuating that I couldn’t have done this on my own?”
Anthony tucked his hands in his pockets. “Not at all. I’m merely telling you that your name and status in this town drew a different crowd.”
No way was she letting him take credit for the good work she had done over the years. “I don’t care who donated. I’m just thankful to get enough money for the new children’s wing they’re adding to the hospital.”
The thought that another unit was needed to aid sick kids made everything else in her life pale in comparison. There were so many ill children and here she was feeling sorry for herself for moving back into her Hollywood Hills mansion. Something was definitely wrong with this picture.
“You’re going to have to slow down, you know.”
Charlotte focused back on Anthony. She braced her hands on her hips, tilting her head. “Slow down with what?”
“Your volunteer work. With having Lily, your time is going to be limited. I’ll