Found: A Mother for His Son. Dianne Drake

was sounding like Dermott was part of a whole family system here. Ex-wife somewhere, child very much present, and parents or in-laws on a ranch. Tidy arrangement. One she almost envied. “I lived on a ranch for a little while when I was a girl. My grandfather’s still there. He raises horses.” They’d bred show horses, and a few that made it to the races. Riding those horses, and helping her grandfather…that’s where she’d learned that life could be good. That’s where she’d also learned to be afraid of too much of a good thing because good things didn’t always last long enough.

      “Can I ride one of his horses? All by myself? The big guy won’t let me ride by myself. Neither will Grandpa Frank. But I promise I won’t fall off.”

      “My grandfather has some pretty strict rules, too.” Rules she should have obeyed, but hadn’t. Rules she often wished she had obeyed, but didn’t someone once say that you can’t go home again? “You have to be at least this high before you can ride all by yourself.” Jenna gestured a height that was a good two heads taller than Max. “But after you grow some, you come back and see me and we’ll talk.”

      Max’s response was a thumbs-up sign, and a big grin that made Jenna grin right along with him. What a great little boy! How in the world could Dermott be so solemn and sad with someone like Max in his life? In some ways, Max reminded her of the way Dermott used to be. All smiles and optimism and enough charm to conquer the world. “Mind if I go find your father?”

      Max pointed to the ceiling, as he scurried down a hallway leading away from the clinic. Jenna looked up, realizing he must have meant that Dermott was upstairs somewhere. So she climbed the first flight only to find herself standing on the threshold of what seemed to be a very nice apartment. No spiders visible, though, which meant she was probably one floor up from there. Next flight up she stopped at a spacious, surprisingly nice third-floor flat. And while she didn’t exactly see the spiders, thanks to Max’s suggestion, she did feel them. Figuratively speaking, of course.

      “Dermott,” she called out.

      “Jenna?” He poked his head out from behind a stack of boxes. “I didn’t expect you until tomorrow.”

      “I got an early start,” she said, surveying what was going to be her home. “There was nothing to keep me in Calgary.”

      “It’s better than it looks.” Dermott laughed, stepping out into full view, wiping his dirty hands on the back of his jeans. “The apartment…it has what real estate agents would call potential.”

      She’d thought the same thing about Dermott, once upon a time.

      “Although I think the potential might have been a little cleaner tomorrow,” he continued.

      Even in the dark, covered with cobwebs, Dermott was gorgeous. But he was divorced, or in the middle of a divorce, she had to remind herself. All looking, no touching. That was the rule. But, dear lord, he was good to look at. She’d always admired that about him. Couldn’t help herself then, couldn’t help herself now.

      It was a brief admiring look, she told herself. Just a tiny little one that didn’t count. One quick glance and it was out of her mind. Gone. Vanished. Poof! “But I don’t have to pay extra for the spiders, do I?”

      He chuckled. “You must have met Max. He’s a little obsessed with the eight-legged creatures right now but, I promise you, there are no spiders here.”

      “Cute little boy. Smart.”

      “Thanks. I’m a little partial, but I think so, too.”

      “You never mentioned him when we talked. Why’s that?”

      “I don’t generally. Max and I keep to ourselves most of the time. We, um…we keep our lives pretty private, pretty simple.”

      Well, this was awkward. No two ways about it, she’d stumbled into a situation where she wasn’t wanted, and from there she didn’t know which way to go. So she didn’t. She kept quiet, stood still and waited for Dermott to make the next move.

      Which he did after he’d felt the long, sticky pause between them. “OK, let’s just get this out of the way,” he said, before the next second of awkward time had passed between them. “I’m a widower. Almost five months now.”

      “Oh, Dermott! I didn’t know. I’m so sorry. It must have been so difficult for you and Max. And he’s so young. Have you two—?”

      Dermott shook his head, effectively cutting her off. “I never, ever talk about it around Max. Nobody else does either. Understood?”

      He’d just put her in her place, good and proper. That’s what she understood. Another thing she understood was that this was not the same man she’d nearly loved all those years ago. He was gone and in his place stood someone she wasn’t sure she even liked very much. The old Dermott had been kind and open. This one was cold, and evasive. The old Dermott had been very generous with the truth. This one withheld it.

      Yes, that’s what she understood, and it’s also what she had to remember. They’d both changed. Times were different. It was probably for the best because now she could put aside all those silly notions and memories.

      But, darn, he was still gorgeous. That hadn’t changed.