Jem steeled himself to remain impassive. He was not now a wounded young ensign, grateful for the patronage of a noble family. As a man of substance in his own right, he could no longer be prey to the worries of his youth. He was genuinely grateful for everything the Fantons had done for him, and for Lizzie, and counted himself fortunate to be aligned to such a generous family. But he was visiting them now not as a casualty of war, to be protected and supported during his recovery, but as an independent gentleman of means and status.
Making Captain had been a proud moment, but the discovery that he had inherited a neat estate and a respectable fortune from a third cousin had been shocking. He had been, just a few years ago, fourth in line, with no thought of such good fortune ever coming his way. But a combination of circumstances—two younger sons killed at Waterloo and the eldest then losing his life in a carriage accident—meant the lawyers had confirmed Jem as the new heir.
It had seemed not quite real, reading the letter in Australia. Having risen through the ranks on his own merits he was now forced to abandon the army career that he had assumed would be his fate for life.
On his return from Australia, he had been pleased to meet Harry again and they had picked up the threads of their old relationship without much difficulty. Jem genuinely liked his former Captain and was pleased to find the old friendly warmth still present in their recent encounters.
He could not, he knew, expect the same warmth from everyone in the family.
He both dreaded and anticipated seeing Olivia again. During his years overseas, hers had been the face in his mind when he’d reminisced of home. She had been but eighteen when he had known her before and she had likely forgotten their former friendship, long ago. This visit—and particularly seeing her again—would help his transition from the romantic foolishness that had comforted him through the long loneliness of his posting. He was old enough now to be past such things. He was certain of it.
‘They have arrived!’ Juliana jumped up and moved to the window, her sharp ears detecting the approaching carriage.
They all rose and went outside to greet their guests, Olivia’s brothers joining them. Adam and Charlotte stood forward, as protocol demanded, with Great-Aunt Clara, Harry, Juliana and Olivia behind them. The footman let down the step and opened the carriage door for the passengers to alight.
Olivia had only a moment to notice Lizzie’s stylish pelisse and her bonnet (topped with three dashing feathers) when her attention was taken up by Jem. His eyes sought hers immediately, it seemed, then moved on to the others.
He was smiling—that familiar lopsided grin—and her heart turned over. Jem. How wonderfully terrifying it was to see him again. She schooled her features into warm politeness. You are no longer a lovesick eighteen-year-old, she reminded herself. Be calm. Be gracious. Be twenty-two.
Lizzie enveloped Olivia in a warm hug. ‘Olivia!’ It is such a joy to see you again!’
‘I am so happy to see you, too! And you, Jem,’ said Olivia, as Jem finally reached her.
He took her hand and held on to it, saying warmly, ‘We were urging the horses on these past five miles, for the nearer we got to Chadcombe, the more impatient we became!’
Olivia’s heart was beating rapidly. Seeing him again was odd—his features so familiar and yet so strange. Thank goodness she was now a confident young lady, and one who had learned to hide her feelings.
Charlotte spoke to Lizzie again and Jem let go of Olivia’s hand. She was conscious of a feeling of loss. No! she told herself. It is but a memory—it is not real. Remember how he hurt you.
She looked closely at him. He looked older—more assured, somehow. It was strange, she thought, how he could look so familiar, yet at the same time so different. Her eyes swept over him. The same wiry frame, but his shoulders were much broader than before. He looked bigger, more self-possessed. Gone was the thinness of the convalescent. He was all man now.
Her eyes moved again to his face. Still handsome, but his features were somehow stronger now. She could find in his face very little of the young man she had known. There was a slight crease in his brow and he looked tired, she noticed. Had the journey been too much for him? Lizzie had told her the doctors had no major concerns about his old injury, but that it did still trouble Jem occasionally.
Olivia had heard this with mixed feelings. She was determined to keep him at a distance and had not forgotten or forgiven him for hurting her. At the same time, her instinctive compassion meant she did not wish to see him—or anyone—in pain.
In the old days, he would never admit it when his leg ached—his pride would never allow it—but Olivia had always known. There would be a tightness along his jaw or in his shoulders, a slight pallor, or occasionally beads of sweat on his forehead.
Today, she had taken the precaution of arranging for a bathtub to be brought to his room and now she nodded significantly at the second footman, who bowed and disappeared towards the kitchens to procure the pails of hot water needed for Mr Ford’s bath. Olivia hoped the footman would remember to add the oil of lavender and marjoram she had pressed this morning—Jem had hated taking laudanum for the pain, so she had found other ways of helping him through the days when he had overreached in his attempt to recover.
Perhaps he would not need the bath, but she had thought it best to be cautious. She had agonised over how it might seem to him—she wanted to give him no opportunity to assume she still felt a tendre for him, but in the end, had decided that to arrange a bath for an honoured guest was not too particular.
Twenty minutes later, the second footman entered the parlour where they were all enjoying tea and conversation, and reported that Mr and Miss Ford’s belongings had now been unpacked and their rooms were ready. The footman smelt strongly of lavender and Jem, sensing it, threw Olivia a quizzical look. She raised her eyebrows in innocent enquiry, determined not to understand him. He then glanced at Charlotte who, as hostess, would be the obvious source of such a luxury. Charlotte, however, was busy with Great-Aunt Clara, who had requested more tea.
Olivia was conscious of a strong feeling of danger. She should not have ordered the bath. He must not assume she was still lovesick for him! It was vital that he understood she was not the person she had been. Ignoring the knot of anxiety resting just below her ribcage, she continued to chat with Lizzie, though she struggled to take in what her friend was actually saying. She must get through this with a calm demeanour. It was imperative.
Jem relaxed in the now-cooling bath, the scent of lavender and marjoram filling his senses and easing the throbbing in his old wound. He had dismissed the footman, needing solitude to relax and think. His leg rarely pained him now, but being stuck in a jolting, leather-slung carriage for most of the day had brought back the old ache.
Other old aches had been reawakened this day, and with unexpected force. Olivia—Lady Olivia—had blossomed into a stunning woman. He closed his eyes. There she was, in his mind’s eye, serene and elegant. Her beautiful face, glossy dark curls and intelligent grey eyes were just as he’d remembered, but there was a new quality about her that he assumed could only be self-assurance gained in the years since he had last seen her.
He had not expected to react so strongly to her but, he reasoned, it was perfectly logical, given the way he had made her the focus of his dreams these past four years. Those dreams were not and had never been real—they were fantastical only, designed to help him cope with the loneliness of his overseas posting.
He had spent most of his time in Australia with soldiers and outlaws and, surprisingly, he had not taken long to adapt to the basic—and hard—life in one of the remotest parts of the world. Their fort, which included a prison for outlaws along with the village that had