“You didn’t—”
“Don’t make excuses. I couldn’t handle watching him die. I spent as much time away from home as possible our senior year.”
“You were a kid.” They turned down the tree-lined street where Katie lived. Noah had been to the house only once since she’d inherited it from her grandmother. That spoke poorly of him, he knew. He’d been a lousy son and was quickly realizing he was also a lousy friend.
“Bull. Emily had just turned sixteen when he was diagnosed. She was there, helping Mom with his care every step of the way.”
“You’re here now.” Katie turned down the front walk of a cute wood-shingled bungalow and Noah stopped. He barely recognized her grandmother’s old house.
Katie glanced back at him over her shoulder and seemed pleased by his surprise. “I made some changes so it would feel more like mine.”
The house was painted a soft gray, with dark red shutters and a new covered front porch that held a grouping of Adirondack chairs and a porch swing painted to match the maroon trim. “I like it. It fits you.”
A blush rose on her cheeks. “Thanks. I hope Gram would approve.”
“In her eyes you could do no wrong.” He followed her up the steps and waited as she unlocked the front door.
“I miss her,” she said on a sigh then crossed the threshold into the house. She pointed toward the cozy family room off the front hall. “The DVDs are in the TV cabinet. Will you set it up while I get snacks together?”
Noah felt his remaining tension melt away. There was something about this house and this woman that put him at ease. Always had.
She made hot chocolate to go with the Christmas theme of the movie and brought in a plate of the bakery’s famous chocolate-chip cookies. They watched the movie in companionable silence. It was nice to forget about his life for a couple of hours. “I can’t even count the number of your grandma’s cookies I ate that last year of high school.” On the screen, Will Ferrell as Buddy the Elf was working his magic in the movie’s department-store Santa display.
Katie gave a small laugh. “Every time you and Tori had a fight, you’d end up here or at the bakery.”
Noah flinched at the name of his high school girlfriend. The girl he’d expected to spend the rest of his life with until she broke his heart the weekend before graduation. “It made her even madder. Since the two of you were such good friends, she felt like you belonged to her.”
“I’d get in trouble for taking your side. Tori and I lost touch after she left for college.” Katie used her finger to dunk a marshmallow in her mug of hot chocolate. “I’ve heard her interior-design business is successful. Someone said she was working on a project in Aspen this summer.”
“Huh.” That was all Noah could think to answer. He’d purposely put his ex-girlfriend as far out of his mind as possible for the past decade. Now, watching Katie lick the tip of her finger, he could barely even remember his own name. He concentrated on the television, where Santa’s sleigh was flying over the rooftops of New York City.
When the movie ended, Katie flipped off the television. His whole body was humming with desire, inappropriately directed at the woman next to him, but he couldn’t seem to stop it. He didn’t move, continued to watch the dark screen that hung on the wall above the antique pine cabinet where the DVD player sat. Clearly misunderstanding his stillness—maybe believing it had something to do with memories of Tori or thoughts of his mother—Katie scooted closer and placed her fingers on his arm. That simple touch set him on fire.
“If there’s anything you need, Noah,” she said into the quiet, “I’m here for you.”
He turned, studying her face as though he was seeing her for the first time. The smooth skin, pert nose and big melted-chocolate eyes. Her bottom lip was fuller than the top, and there was a faint, faded scar at one edge from where she’d fallen out of bed as a girl. That was what she’d told him when he’d asked about it years ago, but now he wanted to know more. He wanted to explore every inch of her body and discover each mark that made her unique.
As if sensing his thoughts, she inhaled sharply. His gaze crashed into hers, and her eyes reflected the same flame of desire he felt. Had it always been there and he’d been too blind to notice it? Now he couldn’t see anything else.
But this was Katie, and her friendship meant something to him. More than any of his casual flings. She mattered, and despite his raging need for her, Noah didn’t want to mess this up. Which was how it worked with him—as soon as a woman wanted more than he was capable of giving, he bailed.
He couldn’t do that with Katie, but would he be able to offer her anything more?
He lifted his hand, tracing his thumb across her bottom lip. “Katie,” he whispered, “I want to kiss you right now.”
Her eyes widened a fraction and he expected her to jump up or slap away his hand. To be the voice of reason when he couldn’t.
Instead she leaned forward, her eyes drifting shut as he moved his hand over her face then wound his fingers through her mass of thick hair. His own eyes closed, anticipating the softness of her lips on his. They flew open again when she nipped at the corner of his mouth then traced her tongue along the seam of his lips.
Although he didn’t think it was possible, his need for her skyrocketed even more. Where the hell had Katie Garrity, who claimed not to have time for a social life, learned to kiss like this? He pulled her against him, deepened the kiss further and fell back against the couch, taking her with him.
His hands ran down her sweater before hiking up the hem so he could touch her skin. He smoothed his callused palms up her back until he felt the clasp of her bra strap under his fingers. With one quick movement, he unhooked the clasp.
He felt Katie giggle against his mouth. His hands stilled as she lifted herself on her elbows, amusement mingling with the desire in her eyes. “Somehow, I knew you’d be good at that.”
“At unhooking a bra?”
She nodded, her tone teasing. “Loads of experience, I imagine.”
To his embarrassment, Katie didn’t have to imagine. Noah made no secret of the fact that he loved women. He’d had more than his share of no-commitment flings and one-night stands, many of which Katie had witnessed, at least from a distance. Now he felt a niggling sense of shame that he traded quantity for quality in his relationships with the opposite sex. Once again, the thought that Katie deserved better than him filled his mind.
He shifted and she sat up, straddling his hips in a way that made it hard to do the right thing. “Maybe we shouldn’t—”
She pressed her hand over his mouth. “I want to know what else you’re good at, Noah.” Her voice caught on his name, and the fingertips touching his lips trembled.
Before he had time to form another halfhearted protest, Katie yanked up her sweater and whipped it over her head, taking her unfastened bra along with it. She held her arms over her breasts.
“You are beautiful,” he said softly, amazed that he hadn’t noticed it before. “Drop your hands, Katie.”
She did as he asked, revealing herself to him. He covered her with his hands, running his thumbs across her nipples and hearing her sharp intake of breath as he did.
He leaned forward and pressed his mouth to her puckered skin as she pulled off his T-shirt. He shucked it off and drew her to him once again, flipping her onto her back then easing his weight onto her. “The bedroom,” he managed on a ragged breath.
“Here, Noah,” she said against his mouth. “Now.”
* * *
Katie watched as Noah dropped to his knees next to the couch and tugged on the waistband of her jeans, undoing the button and pulling the fabric, along with her underpants,