For the past fourteen months, since the day of Kirk’s birth, he’d consciously shoved thoughts of the child away. It had been the only way he could deal with the agreement he’d made with Meghan, the painful agreement to stay out of Kirk’s life.
Kirk entered the kitchen first, toddling a bit unsteadily. Automatically, Seth went down on one knee and opened his arms. Kirk stopped at the sight of him. His bottom lip trembled ominously then he turned back toward Meghan.
Meghan scooped him up in her arms and carried him to the nearby high chair where she buckled him in. Seth dropped his hands to his sides and stood once again, oddly disappointed that the little boy hadn’t run to his embrace.
You stupid dolt, he told himself. What did you expect? The kid has no idea who you are. Why would he come to you? He doesn’t know you’re his father. To him you’re nothing but a stranger. Nothing but a stranger…and if Meghan had her way, that’s what he’d remain.
“Seth, it’s just not a good idea for you to stay here,” Meghan said. She walked to the refrigerator and pulled out a bottle of wine. She held it up and he shook his head.
As she poured herself a glass, he focused his attention once again on his son.
Seth sat in the chair next to Kirk’s high chair. His son. He had his mother’s eyes. Brilliant green and at the moment they stared at Seth with both curiosity and wariness. He didn’t have Meghan’s hair. Kirk’s was straight and a dark, rich brown.
My hair, Seth thought, a thrill shooting through him. The child had his hair and his square chin. Kirk had his straight nose and dark brows, yet had Meghan’s full lips and cheekbones.
The little boy was an attractive combination of both mother and father and a swell of emotion shot through Seth as he continued to drink in the sight of the little features.
Father. The title rang in his head. I’m his father. For the first time the relationship struck Seth deep in his heart.
“Seth, did you hear me?”
Meghan’s voice, tense and with an irritated edge, broke through his reverie. “What?” He tore his gaze from Kirk and focused once again on Meghan.
She handed Kirk a cracker, then joined Seth at the table, her glass of wine in hand. “I said I don’t think it’s a good idea that you stay here.”
“You’re right. It probably isn’t a good idea,” he agreed, then hurriedly added, “but I’ve got no place else to go.”
Her eyes were cold, hard behind her wire-rimmed glasses. “Surely you can think of someplace else.”
“If I could, I wouldn’t be sitting here right now.” He leaned forward and was instantly able to smell her. It was a scent he’d never forgotten, the smell of exotic flowers and mysterious spices. For months after he’d left her, the fragrance had haunted him.
“I need to be someplace where nobody will find me. I need some time to pull myself together, to find Simon. Think about it, Meghan, with the way we parted, nobody would ever think of looking for me here.” He smiled dryly. “In fact, this is the last place on earth anyone would look for me.”
She frowned and took a sip of her wine. The hard glitter in her eyes had been replaced with uncertainty. She looked at Kirk, then back at Seth.
Seth pressed his case. “Please, Meghan. We’re just talking about a couple of days. It shouldn’t take you longer than that to find the information I need. I’ll sleep on the sofa. You won’t even know I’m here.”
Kirk banged on his tray, slobbery cracker crumbs decorating his chin. Meghan stared at her son for a long moment, then looked back at Seth. “Three days,” she finally said, then downed the last of her wine as if she needed the strength found in the bottom of the glass.
“Thanks,” he breathed in relief. He hadn’t realized just how important it was to him until this very moment.
“Don’t thank me,” she snapped. “Understand, Seth, nothing has changed. Our agreement still stands. I don’t want you in my life and I certainly don’t want you in Kirk’s life.”
She stood and placed her empty wine glass into the dishwasher.
At that moment the doorbell rang. She whirled around to look at him, her eyes widened in apprehension. “Maybe being here isn’t as safe as you thought,” she said. “Jonah has ears and eyes everywhere. Maybe they already know you’re here.”
“Maybe you should answer the door and see who it is,” he replied calmly.
He was certain that nobody knew he was here. He hadn’t been lying when he’d said the last place anyone from the agency would look for him was here with Meghan. Everyone knew the acrimony that had marked their divorce.
“Yoo-hoo.” The feminine voice rang out, followed by a rapid staccato of knocks. “Meghan, dear.”
Meghan sighed. “It’s my neighbor, Mrs. Columbus.”
Seth relaxed as Meghan left the kitchen to answer the door. He smiled at Kirk, fighting the impulse to gather the little boy up in his arms…smell the scent of innocence, feel the cuddly warmth that only a small child possessed.
Kirk gifted him with a shy grin and Seth realized at that moment that he’d made a horrible mistake when he’d agreed to stay out of his son’s life.
“I just can’t imagine how I managed to run out of sugar,” Mrs. Columbus preceded Meghan into the kitchen, her duster swirling around her thick legs and her broad face beaming at Seth. “I like a cup of tea in the evenings, but I can’t abide the stuff without a spoonful of sugar.”
“It’s no problem, Mrs. Columbus,” Meghan said as she went to the bright red, apple-shaped canisters on the countertop.
Mrs. Columbus plopped down in the chair next to Seth’s. “And there’s my little buttercup,” she exclaimed to Kirk, who gurgled a greeting in response. “Isn’t he just about the sweetest little dumpling you’ve ever seen?”
Seth grinned. He had a feeling the old woman wasn’t here to fawn over Kirk or to borrow sugar. She was on a fishing expedition. “He is an exceptionally handsome child,” Seth agreed.
“We didn’t officially introduce ourselves earlier.” The woman held out her hand to him. “I’m Rose Columbus, and you’re…?”
Seth thought fast. He had a feeling Rose Columbus was not the soul of discretion. He could easily envision her at the butcher shop, haggling over a cut of meat while wagging her tongue over the local gossip. Telling her the truth might jeopardize him. More importantly, telling her the truth might jeopardize Meghan and Kirk.
He took Mrs. Columbus’s hand in his. “I’m Steve,” he improvised. “Meghan’s cousin.”
Rose’s gray eyebrows danced up in surprise as she looked at Meghan. “You naughty girl, you told me you had no family.”
Meghan glared at Seth. “Steve is sort of a black sheep.”
“Indeed.” Rose returned her gaze to Seth and smiled slyly. “Well, he’s a handsome black sheep, if I do say so myself. So, are you staying here long?”
Seth shrugged. “Just for a little while.”
“How nice for Meghan to have family over the holidays. Since her scalawag husband left her, she spends far too much time alone,” Rose said.
Scalawag husband? What exactly had Meghan told Rose Columbus about him? He raised an eyebrow and looked at Meghan.
Meghan’s cheeks were pink as she thrust a plastic bowl of sugar toward Rose. “Here you are, Rose. That should be enough sugar for several cups of tea.”
“Thanks, dear.” Reluctantly, Rose stood.
Seth had the feeling she wished she’d asked to borrow