Again he realized how loathe he was to see Kit hurt, and again he admitted that he was the one most likely to cause her pain in the very near future. Unfortunately, he couldn’t see that he had any choice in the matter. He could be as honest as she was, though, and hope that she would respect him for it as he respected her.
“The thought did cross my mind,” he said. “Nathan is my son, after all.
“But there are other issues involved, legal issues that we’ll have to sort out. There’s also the fact that he doesn’t know me very well yet. It’s going to be a while before he’s as comfortable with me as he is with you. If I’d taken off with him, I would have probably scared him half to death. That wouldn’t do any of us any good, but especially wouldn’t have been good for Nathan. His best interests have to come first, as I’m sure you’ll agree.”
“Of course, I agree that his best interests are of primary importance. But just because you happened to donate the sperm doesn’t automatically give you parental rights,” Kit retorted in righteous indignation, all evidence of weakness on her part gone in a flash. Holding Nathan tight, she squared her shoulders and met his gaze unswervingly. “I’m the one Lucy designated as her son’s guardian. Nothing was said about you in her will. I don’t think she would have left you out of the equation if she wanted you to be a part of Nathan’s life.”
“Lucy made a lot of decisions about our son that didn’t include me,” Simon pointed out, his own ire returning in full force. “But only because I didn’t know I had a son, thanks to her deception. I know about Nathan now, though, and I’m not letting you exclude me the way she did. I’m a good man and I deserve to have the chance to raise my son. You can try to fight me if you want to, Kit. But be fore-warned—while I don’t want to see you hurt, I will do whatever it takes to get full custody of my son.”
He spoke in a measured tone, never once raising his voice. Still Kit seemed to wilt under his barrage. She didn’t respond verbally in any way, just looked at him with wide, suddenly frightened eyes. Despite all his justifications, spoken and unspoken, in that moment she made him feel like a bully. He could blame her for the provocation, but that didn’t excuse completely his intimidating behavior.
“I want you with me, Kit, not against me,” he added, softening his voice as he reached out to touch her cheek with gentle fingertips.
She flinched away from him as if she’d been scalded.
“It’s Lucy’s wishes that matter to me, not yours, Simon Gilmore. Lucy wanted me, not you, to take care of Nathan if anything happened to her, and that’s exactly what I plan to do.”
“Then I guess I’ll see you in court,” he stated simply, accepting at last that they’d reached an impasse.
“Yes, I guess you will.”
He had said as much as he could, Simon thought, and probably more than he should. Turning away from Kit, he made his way to the door. He didn’t like leaving after such an acrimonious exchange, but neither was he prepared to alter his stance or to take back anything he’d said.
He had tried to be reasonable as he’d stated his case, but Kit hadn’t wanted to be reasonable in return. Now there seemed nothing left to do but head out to the ranch. He’d talk to his parents, and then he would hire an attorney to represent him.
There was no telling how long it would take to win custody of his son. But he had four weeks’ time to get the process started, and he intended to go the distance no matter what it cost him in the end.
To Kit, the hollow sound of the apartment door closing had a frightening ring of finality about it. She wanted to go after Simon and rage at him in the worst way. But all she could do was stand in her tiny kitchen, holding Nathan in her arms, a sick twist in the pit of her stomach.
He had a lot of nerve showing up in Belle, claiming Lucy had lied to him three years ago, then sputtering angrily about his rights. He had likely expected she’d give in to his forcefulness. She was a woman alone, after all, with limited financial resources. But she’d stood her ground, and so he’d upped the ante, changing his tactics like a chameleon changes color.
He had caught her off guard, touching her the way he had so unexpectedly, his hand gentle against her face. For one long moment she had been tempted to believe that he wished her no harm—that when he said he wanted her with him, not against him, they could be partners for Nathan’s benefit.
But then common sense had come to the fore. Simon wanted her cooperation only so that he could gain custody of his son without a legal battle. Once he’d accomplished that task, he’d have no need of her. She would be shuffled off to the sidelines, and eventually, as time passed, the child she’d come to love as her own would be lost to her forever.
The possibility that such a fate awaited her anyway loomed large in Kit’s mind as she retrieved Nathan’s bottle from the table where she’d set it earlier. Through the adoption process, she had learned a little about the laws regarding child custody. But not nearly enough, she admitted now, the dread that had made her stomach roil settling into her soul, as well.
She knew that biological parents had certain rights where their children were concerned unless they gave up those rights willingly or had them taken away by the court. Simon had made it clear that he wanted custody of his son, so he certainly wasn’t going to give up his rights voluntarily. Unless he could be proven to be a danger to the child, the court wasn’t likely to stand in his way, either.
But what about Lucy’s rights, not to mention her wishes? Wouldn’t a mother’s say about who raised her child have some sway with a judge? And if not, where did that leave her? Kit wondered. She would have to call Isaac Woodrow just as soon as she could. Surely he would be able to answer her questions and perhaps even calm her fears.
First things first, though, she told herself as she shifted her attention to the little boy she held in her arms. Ready for his bottle and afternoon nap, Nathan had begun to squirm and fuss impatiently while she let her fears get the better of her. She would be no good to herself or Nathan or to Lucy’s memory if she adopted a defeatist attitude before she had all the facts of the matter.
“Come on, kiddo. Let’s get you settled,” Kit said, glancing at the clock in the kitchen, then heading for the kitchen doorway.
Amazingly it wasn’t quite eleven-thirty. She shouldn’t be surprised since Sara Hale, the college student who looked after Nathan from eleven-thirty till three, hadn’t arrived yet and she was always on time. Still, to Kit, it seemed impossible that so little time had passed considering how completely her life had been changed since Simon had first strolled into the Dinner Belle Diner that morning.
The biggest worry she’d had to face when her alarm had sounded at dawn had been finding a buyer for the diner. Now that seemed like hardly any problem at all, faced as she suddenly was with the possibility of losing Nathan.
Aware that she’d have an easier time slipping back down to the diner if Nathan was asleep when Sara arrived, Kit made fast work of changing the little boy’s diaper and tucking him into his bed with his bottle. He gazed at her with sleepy eyes and smiled at her for an instant, his little mouth curving around the bottle’s nipple in a way that made her heart ache.
Gripping the bed rail with both hands, she stood over him until he let go of the bottle and drifted off to sleep. She reached out to take the bottle with one hand and, with the other, she gently smoothed his dark curls from his forehead.
As her fingers grazed the downy softness of the child’s skin, Kit thought again of how Simon had touched her, but in another, less defensive, light. She had been shocked and appalled by the familiar way in which he’d kissed her. But they had been friends once, and if what he’d said about Lucy was true, he would have had no reason to expect anything but a warm welcome from her.
She’d been startled