How tragic that he hadn’t wanted Ricky hurt…yet he’d ended up hurting all of them.
His deep voice came from behind her. “All of Rick’s things—everything from his apartment—were taken to your mother’s house and stored in his old room after his death. Unless something’s changed, we both know that nothing’s been touched since then. If there was a link to the man who ordered the hit in his effects two years ago, it’s still there. We need to find it.”
Suddenly realizing what he wanted to do, Lindsay whirled from the window and shook her head emphatically. “No. Absolutely not. My mother is well now. Dredging it all up again could—”
“Don’t you want to know?”
“Of course I want to know!” she shot back, her tears close now. “But she’s already had one heart attack. She was lucky that it was mild, but I won’t put her at risk, even on the outside chance that you’re right about this. Just—just stay out of it. Ricky is still dead, and nothing has changed. If the police aren’t interested in reopening the case, let it go. And who says this Decker kid even knew what he was talking about anyway? Ike, you know what happened the last time you decided to do someone else’s job.”
It was a low blow, but he was so set on getting what he wanted, he seemed impervious to it. “Yes, I do. And if I need a reminder, I get one every time I walk into my apartment and you’re not there.”
Before Lindsay could reply, Ike released a ragged blast of air, ambled a few steps away, then came back to her. His gaze passed over her T-shirt and cutoffs again, then returned to her face, his eyes betraying the gentler emotions he kept hidden from the dark and dangerous people he did business with.
“I failed Ricky,” he said quietly. “I tried from the time we met to straighten him out, and I couldn’t do it. If by returning him to jail, I delivered him to a killer, I need to know, and the person behind it has to pay.” He paused. “Talk to your mother. Ask her if I can look through his things. I swear I’ll leave everything exactly as I found it.”
God, he made her ache. “How can you ask me to do this? You know how she feels. She’s never gotten past the sight of you handcuffing Ricky in her backyard.”
“I tried talking first. Your mother knows that. And so do you.”
But when talking hadn’t worked, her mother had expected Ike to look the other way. She hadn’t cared about losing the bail money— She’d expected him to let his brother-in-law go.
“Lindsay, he was twenty-three years old. It was time for him to grow up and take some responsibility for the lousy choices he’d made—not run to his mother like he always did, hitting her up for traveling money—and worse, making her an accessory to a crime. Skipping out on a drug possession charge was just plain stupid. Ricky knew the narc who nailed him was interested in bigger fish—and the narc knew Rick had some useful information. It was a foregone conclusion that they’d offer him a deal. He wasn’t going to spend any time in jail.”
“Exactly,” she said, leveling her gaze on him. “Just like the dead skip from yesterday.”
For a moment, Ike didn’t move a muscle, guilt and bad memories overtaking him again. As always, Lindsay’s words cut to the bone. Then he nodded slowly. “At least think about it.” If he knew anything about her at all, he knew they’d taken this discussion as far as they could tonight. “If you change your mind, I’ll be at the Drifter.”
Ike saw her eyes grow wary and uncertain. “You’re staying in town? It’s only a forty-five minute drive back to Portland.”
“Just overnight.” He hesitated, wondering if he should push for what he wanted using a different approach, then did. “I hoped you might want some justice for your brother so I booked a room with the intention of looking through his things in the morning.” He ascended the landing steps. “Apparently, I was wrong.”
Lindsay stormed up the steps after him. “Don’t you dare dump this on me! My refusal has nothing to do with my lack of caring, and you know it. So stop trying to manipulate me. I won’t put my mother at risk.”
“She can stand right there while I search.”
“And have all her pain dredged up again? No.”
“All right. I’ll find another way to get it done.”
Furious, Ike started to leave, then stopped. He was entitled to his bitterness, but Lindsay had adored her brother from infancy, no matter what kind of trouble he’d dragged home, and she was hurting now—because of him. He couldn’t leave her like this.
“I smelled varnish when I came in,” he said quietly. “I guess you’ve started another project.”
Even during their short time together, she’d always been working on something. If it hadn’t been refinishing a table or chest of drawers, it had been creating beautiful pinecone wreaths for Christmas gifts. “Idle hands are the devil’s workshop,” she’d laughed a million years ago, and tugging her into his arms, he’d chuckled that there were at least a dozen other uses for idle hands.
She took a deep breath, appearing to have noticed his change in demeanor. “I got a good price on the house because there was a lot to do. I’m refinishing the original woodwork—tackling one room at a time to keep my sanity. I have an enclosed back porch that works pretty well as a work space.”
“It’s a big house.”
Nodding, she sent him a wan smile, making Ike think that she, too, wanted to end the night on a decent note. “I’ll be on Social Security before I’m through, but it’ll be worth it.”
“Nah,” he answered, feeling a funny clutching in his chest. “It’s only June. You’ll have everything shipshape before Christmas so you can bake cookies and deck the halls and do all that other stuff you and your mom get involved in during the holidays.”
“Maybe so,” she murmured.
Ike could tell that she, too, was remembering that their one-and-only Christmas together had been cozy and warm, and Ike could almost smell the homey fragrances of pine boughs and cookies baking in the oven. Then the emotional silence stretched out too long, and things got awkward.
“Better leave a window open tonight,” he said gruffly as he stepped onto the porch. “You shouldn’t be breathing in those fumes.”
“I’ll be careful.”
Of course she would, he thought as she followed him out, the screen door creaking shut behind them. She was a paramedic. She knew the dangers better than most people did.
As he moved to the top of the steps, Ike scanned her peaceful neighborhood. Night was on its way. The air had cooled a little, and the crickets were already ringing out a cadence, the vast, open sky filling with stars. Some distance away, the turret atop the Spindrift light began to glow and turn.
He met her soft green eyes again, and damn if that clutching in his chest didn’t come back. “If you change your mind—”
“I won’t. I’m all she has left. Dad’s gone. Ricky’s gone. I can’t let her think—”
“What? That you’ve thrown in with the enemy again?”
“Ike, that’s not fair.”
“No, it’s not,” he replied grimly. “It never was.” Then without looking back, he descended the stairs, crossed her lawn to the driveway and climbed into his SUV.
Lindsay watched until his taillights disappeared and he headed toward town. Then, feeling her heart sink and her tears begin to flow, she went back inside.
Eighteen months. Heaven help her, she’d thought she was cured, settled, finally free of those clawing regrets and the blame