“He won’t tell anyone.”
“I know he won’t.” Or did she? She could only remember the look on Lance’s face when he learned the truth. He had been shocked and disgusted. Jay had shown pity.
She wanted to cry, because the past couldn’t be undone. What she had done couldn’t be forgotten. It was in black and white, for anyone to find. She had been arrested for prostitution. It had felt dirty then, and it still felt dirty.
“God forgives, Bailey, I know that. But forgetting and forgiving myself is the real trick. People are so quick to judge, and to walk away. Everyone thinks they know the story and how to fix it.”
“I know.” Bailey shrugged slim shoulders. “Okay, I don’t know. But in a way, I do. I came home from Wyoming pregnant. It wasn’t easy, and it obviously couldn’t be hidden.”
Lacey nodded, because she had met Bailey when Meg was just a baby. The two had become friends because they’d both felt a little lost and alone that first year of Meg’s life, and the first year of Lacey’s life in Gibson.
“I don’t want Jay to look at me the way Lance looked at me.”
“He’s a different person.”
“True, we’re not dating and he doesn’t feel like I’ve kept something from him. I should have been honest with Lance from the beginning.”
“Maybe, but if he’d loved you, he would have taken time to understand. Just remember, Jay and Lance are two different people.”
Lacey smiled, and it wasn’t hard to do, not with her best friend sitting next to her. “You can give up the matchmaking, my friend. I’m not going to be the dirty sock in the Blackhorse family’s clean sock drawer.”
“That’s the most absurd statement.”
“I like a touch of absurdity from time to time. But you have to admit, it’s a fitting analogy.”
“It’s not. And because you made such a ridiculous statement, you have to make us a salad.”
“Bailey, can I really stay in Gibson if everyone finds out the truth?” Lacey looked at her friend, hoping for answers. The thought of leaving left a wound in her heart because this town really was home.
“You can’t leave, Lacey. What would we do without you?”
“Make your own salad?”
“See, I’d be lost without you in my life.”
Lacey hugged her friend and then hopped down from the stool. “I’ll make your salad, but you have to make ranch dressing. That’s what friends do for each other.”
Her cell phone buzzed. Lacey pulled it out of her pocket and groaned. “It’s Jay.”
“Answer it.”
“I don’t want to talk to him. He can leave a voice mail.”
Bailey grabbed the phone and flipped it open. “Hi, Jay.”
She talked for a minute and then handed the phone to Lacey. She wasn’t smiling, and Lacey’s heart sank with dread.
“Jay?”
“Lacey, Corry is in Springfield.”
“Okay. Where in Springfield? What about Rachel? Are they okay?”
“I’m afraid that’s all the news that I have. They haven’t caught them.”
“Caught them?” She took shallow breaths and sat back down on the stool. “What does that mean?”
“She and her boyfriend robbed a convenience store. Lacey, they had a gun.”
“Rachel?”
“I’m sure she’s still with them.”
Lacey closed her eyes, fighting fear, fighting thoughts that told her that Rachel would be hurt, or worse. She didn’t want to think about what this meant for her sister. “They don’t know for sure?”
“They don’t. Do you want me to come and get you? If you can’t drive, I can come over there.”
She could drive, of course she could. Her hands shook and she didn’t want to think, to let it sink in.
“I can drive myself home. Will you call if you hear something?”
“You know I will.”
“Okay.” She sobbed a little, not wanting him to hear. “Jay, thank you.”
“You’re welcome. And I’m sorry.”
She closed her phone and slipped it into her pocket. Bailey’s hand was on her shoulder. “It’ll be okay.”
“I don’t know how.”
“Let Jay drive you home.” Bailey sat down across from her, their salads forgotten.
“No, I’m fine. You need to eat. Little Cody Junior can’t go without food.”
“I’ll eat, but you need to let friends help you through this. Lacey, you’ve always been there for me. Let me be here for you. Let Jay be a friend.”
Jay, a friend? It felt like a mismatched shoe. It didn’t fit. It was a little tight. A little uncomfortable.
* * *
Jay hung up from the call to Lacey and concentrated on driving, on not getting distracted. As he pulled up to the barn, he noticed his parents on the porch. They were home. He hadn’t expected that.
His dad greeted him as he got out of the truck.
“I wondered if you were coming home any time soon.” Bill Blackhorse smiled and winked, talking the way they had talked to one another a dozen years ago.
“Did you think I would pull a stunt and miss curfew?” Jay smiled back.
“Nah, not really. But as we came through town we saw your truck and Lacey’s car at the church.”
“I was just doing what Mom asked, making sure Lacey was okay.”
“Lacey is a wonderful young woman.”
So that’s the way this was going. Not that Jay was surprised. His dad had introduced him to Cindy, too.
“Dad, we’re neighbors, maybe friends, nothing more.”
His dad patted him on the back and they walked into the barn together. “Jay, it’s okay to fall in love again.”
“Is it, Dad?” Jay pulled his saddle out of the tack room. “I need to work that black mare.”
“Working the black mare isn’t going to undo what’s happening to you. You’re letting go. I guess maybe you feel guilty.”
Jay shrugged. He faced his dad, and it wasn’t comfortable. He wanted to let it go, the way they’d been letting it go for years now.
“Dad, I can’t forget Jamie. I can’t forget that I loved her.”
“No one said you had to forget. But let someone else in. That’s all I’m saying.”
Jay walked out the back of the barn. At the gate he whistled and the horses, ten of them grazing a few hundred feet away, turned to look at him. A few went back to grazing. He whistled again and they headed in his direction.
“What you’re saying is that I should let Lacey in.” Jay smiled, glancing at his dad in time to catch a shrug and a little bit of a sheepish look. “Dad, you can’t push us together. From what I hear, Lacey is still getting over Lance. I still have a wedding ring in my dresser drawer.”
“I’m asking you to pray.” Bill reached out to pet his favorite gray mare. “I’m asking you to let God heal