“Because last night shouldn’t have happened. It won’t happen again.”
The arousal simmering in her stomach turned cold and hard like cooling candle wax. Last night she’d had the best sex of her life and he was willing to dismiss it? “I’m sorry to hear that. Do you mind if I ask why?”
“Yes.”
She waited for him to elaborate. When he didn’t, she asked, “Yes what?”
“Yes, I mind if you ask.”
“That was a rhetorical question. Why can’t we make love again?”
A nerve in his jaw twitched. “Look, Juliana, you’re an attractive woman. It’s been a while since I…It’s been a while for me. I should have controlled myself last night.”
This grew worse by the second. “Are you saying you were just scratching an itch and any woman would have done?”
He hesitated and those silent seconds crushed her heart in a vise. Breathless with pain, Juliana turned back to the coffeepot and filled a mug with unsteady hands. She didn’t want the fragrant brew, didn’t even know if she could keep it in her churning stomach, but she couldn’t face him right now.
And then an even more painful realization hit. Lust wouldn’t hurt this much. That meant that her feelings for Rex might be more than simple physical desire. Was she falling for him? Her heart pounded. No, she couldn’t be. He didn’t fit in with her life plan or her career goals.
“Juliana, I’m sorry.”
She straightened her spine, lifted her chin and met his solemn gaze. She tightened her fingers around the mug in a grip that would break more fragile china. “I’m not sorry.”
She wasn’t. Taking control of their relationship, her sexual pleasure and her life was—what had he said?—oh, yes, a journey she had to take. But she wasn’t the auditor with the highest success rate at Alden Bank and Trust for nothing. When she wanted something, she didn’t give up without a fight. And she wanted more of the passion Rex Tanner had shown her. More of her reluctant rebel. She wanted—needed—to store up memories for later.
Did he want the same? She didn’t know, but she’d learned early on that if you wanted something and didn’t speak up, then you got exactly what you asked for. Nothing. And if that meant she had to become the seducer instead of the seducee then she’d willingly take on the role.
Rex exhaled harshly. “You don’t get it. I can’t be the man you need. You’re hearts and flowers and forever. I’m not. I let people down, Juliana. It’s what I do best.”
Forever? Her mind snagged on the word. “I didn’t ask for forever, Rex. All I’m asking for are the two and a half weeks remaining in your auction package.”
His jaw muscles bunched.
She closed the gap between them and opened her hand over his chest. His heart beat frantically beneath her palm. “Seventeen days, Rex. That’s all I want.”
Now that you’ve tasted passion, can you live without it?
Of course she could. She had her life mapped out and if she wanted to make it to the top, the way her mother had, then Juliana couldn’t afford detours. Especially not the kind that made her think of taking days off to laze in bed with a lover.
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