“I didn’t mean to snap at you,” he said, his mind still reeling.
She smiled, then glanced away. “I understand.”
But she didn’t; she couldn’t.
He probably should tell her about Joey, about how he’d lost his son, about how he still ached with grief. But he didn’t think he could open his heart like that without choking up and falling apart.
Besides, the baby news had slammed into him like a runaway train, and it was too soon for him to have a rational reaction to it.
Even if he’d been happy to learn that he was going to be a father again, he wasn’t sure if he could trust her. What if Jillian took his baby away and never let him see it again?
He studied her for a moment, watched her slip her hand between the table and her belly, stroking her rounded womb as if caressing the child that grew there.
His child.
Her child.
Fear of repeating the past—the pain, the grief—threatened to suck the breath right out of him, but he couldn’t let it. He had to face the truth. He was going to be a father again.
And there was no reason history had to repeat itself.
“When’s the baby due?” he asked.
“December third.” Her gaze wrapped around his, and she smiled, a whisper of relief chasing away all signs of her nervousness.
How had he missed seeing it before—the obvious pregnancy, the maternal glow?
Jillian might have waited too damn long to tell him about the baby, but he sensed she was happy about the situation.
“Are you planning to drive back to Houston tonight?” he asked.
She caught his gaze. “Actually, I didn’t like the idea of being on the road after dark, so I got a room at the Night Owl.”
“You could have stayed with me.”
“I… Well, I suppose I could have, but I wasn’t sure how you’d take the news. And I figured things might be a little awkward between us.”
“Maybe so, but we’ll need to deal with the situation anyway.” And some of it was going to be tough.
Shane scanned the honky-tonk, and when he spotted Trina, he motioned for her to come to the table.
“Are you hungry?” he asked Jillian.
“A little.”
When Trina reached the table, Shane said, “We’d like to place an order to go.”
“All right. I’ll get you a couple of menus.” When she returned, she handed each of them the new, one-sided laminated sheet of cardstock that offered a few appetizers and various sandwiches. “I’ll give you a chance to look this over, then I’ll be back.”
“Where are we going?” Jillian asked him.
“When I thought we were just tiptoeing around our attraction and a possible romance, I figured the Stagecoach Inn would be good place to kick up our heels and forget all the reasons why a long-distance relationship wouldn’t work out. But now that things have taken an unexpected turn, we need to find a quieter spot so we can talk.”
Jillian didn’t respond.
Moments later, Trina returned for their orders.
“I’ll have the soup and salad combo,” Jillian said.
Shane chose the bacon cheeseburger and fries.
“You got it.” Trina scratched out their requests on her pad before taking the order to the kitchen.
While Shane and Jillian waited for their food, they made small talk about the music on the jukebox and some of the more interesting characters who had begun to fill the honky-tonk. Yet the tension stretched between them like a worn-out bungee cord ready to snap.
Before long, Trina returned with a take-home bag, as well as the bill. Shane paid the tab, leaving her a generous tip.
“Are you ready?” he asked Jillian, as he scooted back his chair and got to his feet.
Jillian stood and reached for her purse. “So where did you decide to eat?”
“You said you had a room at the Night Owl. Let’s go there.”
If she had any reservations about taking him back to the motel with her, she didn’t say. And Shane was glad. It was important that they take some time to really get to know each other.
And the sooner they got started doing that, the better.
As dusk settled over Brighton Valley, Shane and Jillian stepped out of the honky-tonk and into the parking lot, which was filling up with a variety of pickups and cars.
“Did you drive from the motel?” he asked.
“No, I walked. The doctor encouraged me to get plenty of exercise, and since I’d been in the car for the past two hours, I thought… Well, it was only a couple of blocks, and it was a good way to stretch my legs.”
So she’d already seen a doctor. That was good.
“Is everything going okay?” he asked. “No problems?”
“I had a little nausea at first, but it wasn’t anything to complain about.”
He was glad to hear that. Marcia had been pretty sick when she’d been pregnant with Joey, although she felt a bit better by the time she was four or five months along. In fact, if he remembered correctly, Marcia had been at that stage when they’d learned that Joey was going to be a boy.
Shane assumed that, since Jillian was seeing a doctor, she was having all the appropriate tests and exams. So he asked, “Do you know whether it’s going to be a girl or a boy?”
“No, I told the doctor I wanted to be surprised.” She shrugged. “At least, I’d thought so at the time of my sonogram. But I have to admit, I’m getting more and more curious now.”
As they continued walking to the street, their feet crunching along the graveled parking lot, Shane couldn’t help stealing a glance at Jillian, checking out the way her belly swelled with their child.
He suspected that she was going to be one of those women who was even more beautiful when she was nine months pregnant. But he didn’t want her to think his only concern was the baby, so he asked, “How’s school going?”
“It took a little while to get back into the swing of taking notes and studying, but I’m doing okay now. I’m taking two summer courses, and I have finals in two weeks, but nothing too difficult.”
“Then what?” he asked.
“I’ll begin the student-teaching phase during the fall semester…?. Well, that was my game plan before finding out about the baby. It’s due right before Christmas, so I’ll probably have to wait another semester.”
“How are you fixed for money?” he asked.
“I’m okay.” She pulled up short. “That’s not why I came out here.”
He stopped, too. “You need to understand something. I don’t expect you to support the baby all by yourself. I’ll do my part.”
She bit down on her bottom lip, then her gaze lifted and locked on his. Sincerity flared in her eyes, as well as determination. “You don’t have to.”
Yes, he did.
Unable