The Rancher's Doorstep Baby. Patricia Thayer

quickly soaped his body and rinsed, then climbed out of the shower. After dressing in clean underwear and jeans, he walked into the bedroom. He decided some television might be a good distraction. He went to the table for the remote, and lying with his wallet and change, he found the small medallion he’d carried in his pocket for the past months. The tiny St. Christopher’s medal that was once pinned in his son’s crib, a crib that Nathan never got the chance to sleep in.

      The familiar tightness constricted his chest, gripping his heart, making it hard to breathe. He welcomed the physical pain. He deserved it. He rubbed the medal between his fingers. It was a constant reminder of what he’d lost. What he could never bring back.

      A faint sound drew Cole’s attention. He listened and realized it was Rachel crying in the next room. He told himself it was good she was finally letting go of her pain. He wasn’t going to invade her privacy.

      Over an hour later, still unable to sleep, he’d gotten engrossed in an action movie, but not so much that he hadn’t kept an ear turned to Rachel’s room. It had been pretty quiet, and he was grateful she’d fallen asleep.

      He had dozed off when he heard the murmured sounds, too loud to ignore. He got up and went to the connecting door, cracked it open and spoke her name.

      No answer. He saw her lying on the bed, dressed in a white cotton nightgown that had ridden up, revealing long, gorgeous legs. Desire shot through him and he quickly dragged his gaze to her face as she tossed back and forth on the pillow, crying out. He went to her, and sat down on the edge of the bed.

      “Rachel…” he said, but she didn’t answer. He finally reached out and touched her shoulder. She jerked up with a gasp.

      “Cole,” she whispered in a husky voice. Their gazes locked and he wanted to absorb the sadness he saw in those depths.

      “You were having a nightmare.”

      She brushed back her long, wavy hair with a trembling hand. “Oh God, I was dreaming that Sarah came home. She was pregnant, but Father threw her out. I was running after her…begging her not to leave.” Her lips quivered as she fought for control. “Oh, Cole, I can’t believe it. She’s gone. I’d always hoped she’d come back.”

      The dim light didn’t hide her anguish. “She might have. But it was Sarah’s choice, Rachel. She chose to leave and you chose to stay on the ranch. You can’t punish yourself for something you didn’t have any control over.”

      She drew a shaky breath. “I wish it could have been different.”

      “There are things we all wish could be different, but wishing doesn’t make it so.”

      “I never got to tell her I loved her.”

      Rachel Hewitt was a strong woman, but the past two days would knock the strongest person down. He finally pulled her into his arms and inhaled her soft fragrance.

      He wanted desperately to give her strength, but he didn’t have any to spare. All he could manage was human contact, which he needed as much as she did. He caressed her back as he pressed a soft kiss on top of her head.

      “It’s going to be all right,” he lied. His hands continued to move over her. The action seemed to calm her. He touched her hair, smoothing it back from her tearstained face.

      “You don’t know,” she said. “Before Sarah left, I said so many awful things to her. I was jealous. She was so pretty. I was just…plain. She had everything and she was leaving me with Father.”

      “Oh, Rachel, you could never be cruel on purpose and don’t ever say you’re plain.”

      She raised her face to his, her eyes wondrous, making his pulse race. Before he knew what he was doing, he bent down and touched his mouth to hers, telling himself it was to reassure and comfort her.

      She sucked in a tiny breath as he caressed her lips, tasting her softness, her sweetness. Her fingers raised to his chest and the contact seared his skin. He pulled her against his body and deepened the kiss. His tongue teased the seam of her lips open and Rachel whimpered. More heat surged through him.

      It had been so long…so long since he’d wanted anyone, craved any closeness on a physical level. But Rachel was exactly the kind of woman he couldn’t get involved with. She wasn’t a one-night stand. She’d made him feel…too much. No, he couldn’t go through that again. He broke off the kiss and saw her eyes glazed with desire.

      “Cole…” She spoke his name so intimately, as if they’d already been lovers.

      He shivered and fought to keep his body in control. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that. I was out of line.” He started to get up, but she refused to let him go.

      “Please,” she whispered, “don’t leave me.”

      Cole froze. He had to get out of there, but seeing Rachel’s panic, he couldn’t move. He of all people knew what it was like to need someone.

      Without a word, he drew the blanket over her, then he laid on top and cradled her against him. He held her until he felt her go slack in his arms. She had fallen asleep. He smiled, then eased her off his chest. He started to lay her down on the bed when she tightened her hold.

      “Please…stay,” she whispered, sleepily. “Just for a little while.”

      He bit back a groan. “Okay, Rachel…I won’t leave you,” he murmured, then stretched out next to her and drew her to his side, her head resting against his shoulder. Maybe together, holding each other, they could keep the demons at bay. For a short time anyway.