It did to her though.
‘I’ve got a bed pan in the ambulance,’ Victoria said, ‘and we’ll put lots of pads on the stretcher, so if you do have a little accident we’ll have you all cleaned up before you go into the Castle.’
Penny nodded and Victoria pushed through the vital medicine.
The oxygen was helping, and with the other medications she started to calm. Soon her breathing was a little deeper, and the horrible mottled tinge to Penny’s skin was starting to recede.
They needed to get her to Paddington’s.
This time there was no question that she could get onto the stretcher by herself so Glen gently picked Penny up. He placed her on the stretcher and made sure that she was safely secured, and then together he and Victoria raised it up.
‘Ready for the off?’ Victoria said as she always did.
And always Penny nodded and smiled, or if she wasn’t well enough, as was the case today, would do a little thumbs-up sign.
Today though, she spoke. ‘Not...’ She gasped but she couldn’t finish her sentence and Julia moved to reassure her.
‘We’ve got everything with us, Penny,’ Julia said, because she always made sure that she had Penny’s favourite things.
But Victoria knew that that wasn’t what Penny had been trying to say.
Victoria had seen it happen in many patients—they just wanted a moment more in their home, though usually they were much older than Penny when they felt that way.
‘It’s okay, Penny,’ Victoria said. ‘We can take a minute.’
Yes, she was time critical, but the priority, too, was to cause the little girl minimum distress, and rushing her out against her wishes would only cause her to get upset. And so she stood and waited as Penny’s eyes moved around the room.
And Julia understood then what her daughter had meant when she had tried to say that she wasn’t quite ready to leave.
Penny wanted to take a long look at her home.
And she did.
She looked over at the television, which had been paused in the middle of a cartoon, and all of her favourite characters were frozen on the screen. Then her eyes went to the chair and then over to the sofa where she had lain and she was imprinting it all.
Penny didn’t know if she would be coming home.
Julia, who was very strong and used to seeing her daughter unwell, was choking up.
‘Why don’t you get a glass of water, Julia,’ Victoria suggested, and as Julia wept in the other room, Penny sat just taking in the memories of her home.
Glen, of course, was tearing up and Penny gave him a stern look that warned him to stop then and there.
Julia bustled back in and saw Penny’s eyes linger on a photo. It looked like a holiday snap of the family at the beach. ‘Shall we bring that with us, darling?’ Julia asked.
Penny nodded and then rested back on the pillows and now she gave her usual little thumbs up.
She was ready.
Peter, her father, gave his daughter a kiss and told her that he was going to lock up and would see her soon at the hospital.
Once in the vehicle they alerted Paddington’s to let them know they were on their way along with the details and status of the patient that they were bringing in.
Glen drove and Victoria sat in the back with Julia and Penny. There was no need for sirens as the streets were empty, but the lights were on and if needed Glen would use the siren at traffic lights or if the situation changed.
The mood was sombre.
Usually Julia would read Penny a story on the way to the hospital but she just sat there while the blue lights of the ambulance shadowed her face.
‘Story...’ Penny said.
‘Well, let me see...’ Victoria answered. And she let Julia sit quietly and gather herself for whatever lay ahead.
Victoria thought for a moment; she had told Dominic that she didn’t believe in fairytales, but growing up she had loved them, just like any little girl.
She had just never had to make one up before.
Victoria thought for a moment and then she told Penny about a turret and a magic castle and a little girl who used to sneak behind the files and find her way up there. And she watched as Penny gave a faint smile so Victoria knew she must be telling the tale okay. ‘There’s a princess who lives there and she watches over all the babies and children.’
‘Truly?’ Penny gasped.
‘Of course,’ Victoria said. ‘I told you, it’s a magic castle.’
And she held the little girl’s hand and told her some more and it really did seem to soothe Penny.
Her colour was terrible though and her heart was galloping, but then Penny looked up at the blacked-out windows and smiled.
Victoria glanced up too and relief flooded her as the familiar roofline came into sight.
The not-so-new Dr Thomas Wolfe was waiting for them. Victoria had been right—he had worked here. She recognised him from many years ago when she had just started to work on the ambulances, but this was no time to reminisce with him.
She was just relieved that someone so skilled was here to greet this very sick little girl.
Thomas listened to the handover as they moved her onto the resuscitation bed. He thanked the paramedics as he examined the patient and Victoria saw his expression was grim as he listened to her back and chest.
‘You’re doing very well, Penny,’ he said to her, and he gently sat her back. She was upright in the bed as she was still struggling to breathe. The nurses worked deftly alongside him, attaching Penny to monitors and leads and pulling up the drugs and IV solutions that Thomas was calling for.
Victoria had done her job—she had delivered Penny safely to the Castle, and that had used to be enough for her. But so badly she wanted to stay and see how Penny was doing.
She actually had to prise herself away.
Maybe it was because she herself was going to be a mother that suddenly things were affecting her more.
Or maybe it was that since Dominic had come into her life she simply felt everything more acutely.
It was as if her emotions had been reset to a heightened level and Victoria felt on the edge of tears as she saw more staff running into the resuscitation room.
‘I’m going to go and get a drink,’ Glen said.
‘Sure.’ Victoria nodded and she set about making up the stretcher, telling herself to stop getting so upset, that it was just work.
Of course, Glen didn’t really want a drink; his flask was in the ambulance and there was a coffee machine close by.
He walked through the department and stood in the kitchenette; he clung to the bench and told himself to take some deep breaths.
And that was where Dominic found him.
‘Hi there,’ Dominic said, but he got no response.
He knew that Glen’s presence meant that Victoria was here somewhere, but he could see that Glen was struggling, and so, instead of heading out, he spoke with him for a while.
Dominic discovered that indeed Glen and Victoria had been at Piccadilly on Friday.
No, he didn’t push for information but he guessed, and rightly so, that the weekend had taken a bit of a toll on both of them. Dominic was very grateful to this man for looking out for her.
And