‘Charlotte…’
He took a step towards her but she held up her hand to ward him off. ‘No, don’t. Please. I can’t bear it. I hate what’s happened to us. We had such a lovely relationship…You were the most wonderful man I’d ever met…so warm and vibrant. I loved you with all of my heart. I would never have done anything to hurt you, but you’ve destroyed it all. You’re angry at missing out on Emily’s life so far, but what about what I’ve missed out on?’ Tears were running down her cheeks and she brushed at them angrily. ‘Have you ever stopped to think of that? Have you?’
Damon swallowed back the raw pain in his throat. He wasn’t used to so much emotion overloading his system. Four years ago he had shut off his feelings; only the loss of Eleni had resurrected them before he had locked them away again behind a bolted door in his brain. But he felt now as if Charlotte was picking the lock, her own emotions seeping under the door to reach his…
‘What have you missed out on, Charlotte?’ he asked hollowly. ‘Tell me.’
He saw her chest lift and fall in a ragged sigh. ‘I felt so alone when I came back to Australia…My mother was diagnosed with breast cancer the same week I had the pregnancy confirmed. I was so torn. There were so many people depending on me. Stacey was devastated by Mum’s diagnosis and began to experiment with drugs to blunt the pain. She never really got over my father’s suicide while he was in prison. She adored him and, being so young, she didn’t quite understand why he would do that. I threw myself into my studies, knowing I would have to provide for my child and possibly Stacey as well. I had no one to turn to, no one to tell how scared I was. I hadn’t even held a baby before and suddenly I was expecting one.’
Damon felt his chest tighten to the point of pain. How had he been so blind and unfeeling? Even if she was as guilty as he believed her to be, it did not excuse his treatment of her since. ‘I do not know what to say…’
She gave him a bleak look. ‘I guess sorry is out of the question. You’re too proud to admit you got it wrong.’
‘I am sorry you have had to deal with this alone. But you will no longer have to do so. We will be together from now on to give Emily all that she deserves as a much loved daughter.’
‘But she won’t have two parents who love each other,’ she reminded him. ‘That’s what every child deserves.’
‘In this day and age it is rare for both parents to remain together, let alone maintain that level of affection. We will no doubt become friends over time.’
‘We didn’t do so well on the friends thing before,’ she reminded him.
‘Yes, well, I am perhaps to blame for that,’ he admitted. ‘I cannot seem to help myself around you. I am still fiercely attracted to you.’
‘Which you hate yourself for, remember?’
‘You have said much the same, Charlotte.’
She shifted her gaze. ‘So you’re expecting our marriage to be normal…as in sex and all that.’
‘I am a little intrigued as to what exactly you are referring to as “all that” but yes—I would hope that we will maintain as normal a relationship as possible. It will be good for Emily to grow up in a family atmosphere.’
Charlotte looked down at her hands for a moment. ‘She likes you…Emily, I mean…In fact, I think she already loves you…’
He cleared his throat. ‘She is a beautiful child. I cannot believe she is really mine.’
Her eyes sprang back to his defensively. ‘If you feel the need to have a paternity test done I won’t stop you.’
He frowned at her expression. ‘I was not for the moment suggesting—’
‘Yes, you were, go on—admit it. I can see the flicker of doubt in your eyes. What if she’s lying again, foisting some other man’s brat on me to get more money? That’s what you’re thinking, isn’t it?’
He let out a frustrated breath. ‘This is a going nowhere discussion. I can see Emily is mine. I do not need a test to confirm it.’
‘What if she didn’t look like you?’ she asked with an accusing glare. ‘I bet you’d be swabbing her mouth with a dip stick and rushing it off to the nearest DNA laboratory as soon as you could.’
‘Is there some doubt in your own mind as to who is her father?’ he asked.
Her eyes turned to twin points of angry blue flame. ‘How can you ask that?’ she choked.
‘It is a reasonable question, I would have thought. It’s been four years; surely there have been other men in your life.’
‘There hasn’t been anyone since you.’
He raised his brows cynically. ‘For someone who claims to abhor being deceitful, you show a remarkable talent for it.’
Charlotte swung away in fury. ‘Here we go again. You refuse to believe a single word I say. This is never going to work.’
‘It will work because we will make it work,’ he said. ‘We are both committed to Emily. She is my biggest priority now. I want to spend time getting to know her, catching up on all I missed out on before.’
She held her arms close to her body without turning around. ‘I have photos and film footage of her first steps and words. I’ve kept everything…even all of her baby clothes…’
‘I would like to see them some time.’
‘I’ll collect them from my flat.’
‘About your flat…’ Damon paused before continuing. ‘Does your sister live there with you permanently?’
Charlotte turned back to look at him. ‘No…she comes and goes a bit but I’ve never encouraged her to move in with us.’
His expression was thoughtful as he watched her for a moment.
‘I think she’s beyond help,’ she added in a defeated tone, her eyes falling away from his. ‘I’ve done everything I can…I only agreed to your terms so I could help her but she used that money to pay back her dealer.’ Her shoulders dropped another level as she continued. ‘I would have even slept with you that first night if it would have brought her back. I would have done anything, but sometimes anything and everything is just not enough…’
‘You look exhausted.’ Somehow Damon got his voice into gear. ‘You can have the bed. I’ll sleep on the sofa.’
‘Are you sure?’
Her grateful look was like an arrow to his heart. He stretched his mouth into the semblance of a smile. ‘Go to bed, Charlotte. You have no need to fear my attentions tonight.’ He moved towards the door.
‘Damon?’
He brought his gaze back to hers. ‘I am going out for a short while. I would like to spend the next few days with Emily, if I may. You will have a full three weeks ahead with the launch of the exhibition. Emily and I can spend the time getting to know one another. With her arm so tender I would not like to have her bumped by other children at childcare.’
Fresh tears washed into Charlotte’s eyes at his concern for his little daughter, but before she could assemble the words to tell him how touched she was he had already left.
‘YOU should see the hordes of people coming in,’ Diane said three weeks later. ‘This is going down as one of the highlights of the museum’s year.’
Charlotte wondered what her