‘Or I could bring him up on my own,’ Dylan suggested, nettled that she hadn’t listed it as a third option.
She scoffed. ‘So, what? You get a live-in nanny and dump his care on her, and see him for two seconds when you get home from work?’
‘That’s unfair.’
‘Is it?’ she asked pointedly.
He’d rather have all his teeth pulled out without anaesthetic than admit it to her, but it was probably accurate. ‘I don’t want to live with you.’ He didn’t want to live with anyone.
‘Newsflash. I don’t want to live with you, either. But I’m prepared to put Tyler’s needs before mine. Just as I know Ally would’ve done for me, if our positions were reversed.’
And just as Pete would’ve done for him. Disgust at himself flared through Dylan’s body. At heart, he really was a chip off the old block, as selfish as his mother. And that didn’t sit well with him. He didn’t want to be like her. ‘Caring for a baby on your own is a hell of a commitment.’
‘I know. But I’m prepared to do it.’
‘Pete and Ally knew it was too much to ask one person to do. It’s why they asked us both.’
‘And you’ve had second thoughts.’ She shrugged. ‘Look, it’s fine. I’ll manage. I can always ask my mum for help.’
Which was a lot more than Dylan could do. And how pathetic was he to resent that?
‘I need some time to think about this,’ he said. Time where he could work things out, without anyone crowding his head. Where he could do what he always did when he made a business decision: work out all the scenarios, decide which one had the most benefits and least risks. Plan things without any emotions getting in the way and messing things up. ‘How long is it until you need to get back to Tyler?’
‘Mum said she could babysit for as long as I needed. I had no idea how long things would take at the solicitor’s.’
He made a snap decision. ‘OK. We’ll meet again in an hour. When we’ve both had time to get our heads round it.’
‘I don’t need t—’ she began, then shut up. ‘You’re right. I’ve had time to think about what the social worker said. You haven’t. And it’s a big deal. Of course you need time to think about it. Is an hour enough?’
He’d make sure it was. ‘An hour’s fine. I’ll see you back here then.’
FRESH AIR. THAT would help, for starters. Dylan found the nearest park and walked, ignoring the noise from tourists and families.
Pros and cons. He didn’t want to live with anyone. He was still licking his wounds from the end of his marriage—ironic, considering that he’d been the one to end it. And even more ironic that, if Nadine had waited six more months before issuing that ultimatum, she would’ve had her dream.
But it was too late, now. He couldn’t go back. He didn’t love her anymore, and he knew she was seeing someone else. Someone who was prepared to give her what he wouldn’t. What hurt most now was that he’d failed at being a husband.
That left him with a slightly less complicated situation; though it didn’t make his decision any easier. If he did have to live with someone else, an emotional, flaky woman and a tiny baby would be right at the bottom of his list. He had a business to run—something that took up as much of his energy as he could give. He didn’t have time for a baby.
But...
If he backed out, if he let Emmy shoulder all the responsibilities and look after the baby, he’d only be able to block out the guilt for a short time. It would eat away at him, to the point where it would affect his business decisions and therefore the livelihoods of everyone who worked for him. Besides, how could he live with himself if he abandoned the child his best friend had loved so dearly?
Given how often he’d been dumped as a child, how could he do the same thing to this baby?
He couldn’t let Tyler down. Couldn’t break a promise he’d made.
Which meant he had to find a way of coexisting with Emmy.
She’d said earlier that they wouldn’t be living together, just sharing a house. They could lead completely separate lives. All they’d need to do was to set up a rota for childcare and then brief each other at a handover. He could do that. OK, so he’d have to delegate more at work, to carve out that extra time, but it was doable. His flat was on a short-term lease, so that wasn’t a problem. And he had no intention of getting involved with anyone romantically, so that wouldn’t be a problem in the future, either.
So the decision was easy, after all.
He walked back to the café, and was slightly surprised to find that Emmy was already there. Or maybe she’d never left. Whatever.
‘Coffee?’ he asked. ‘You paid last time, so this one’s on me.’
‘Thank you.’
He ordered coffee then joined her at the table. ‘If we’re going to share a house and Tyler’s care, then we need to sort out some ground rules. Set up a rota.’
She rolled her eyes. ‘Obviously. Childcare and housework.’
‘Not housework. We’ll get a housekeeper.’
She shook her head. ‘I can’t afford to pay a housekeeper.’
‘I can. So that’s settled.’
‘No. This is shared equally. Time and bills.’
Did she have to be so stubborn about this? It was a practical decision. The idea was to look at how they could make this work, with the least pain to both of them. Why do something he didn’t have time for and didn’t enjoy, when he could pay someone to do it? ‘Look, I’m going to have a hard enough time fitting a baby into my work schedule, without adding in extra stuff. And I’m sure it’s the same for you. It makes sense to pay someone to clean the house and take some of the pressure off us.’
‘I can probably stretch to paying someone to clean for a couple of hours a week,’ she said, ‘but that’s as far as it goes.’
‘So you’re saying we both have to cook?’
‘Well, obviously. It’s a bit stupid, both of us cooking separately. It makes sense to share.’ She stared at him. ‘Are you telling me you can’t cook?’
He shrugged. ‘I shared a house with Pete at university.’ And Emmy must know how hopeless Pete was—had been, Dylan corrected himself with a jolt—in the kitchen. ‘So it was starve, eat nothing but junk, or learn to cook.’
‘And what did you opt for?’
Did she really have to ask? He narrowed his eyes at her, just to make the point that she was being overpicky. ‘I learned to cook. I only do basic stuff—don’t expect Michelin-star standard—but it’ll be edible and you won’t get food poisoning.’ He paused as a nasty thought struck him. ‘Does that mean you don’t cook?’
‘I can do the basics,’ she said. ‘I shared a house with Ally at university.’
And Ally was an excellent cook. Dylan had never turned down the offer of a meal at his best friend’s; he was pretty sure it must’ve been the same for Emmy. ‘And she did all the cooking?’ he asked.
‘Our deal was that she cooked and I cleaned.’ Emmy shrugged. ‘Though I picked up a few tips from her along the way.’
But she wasn’t claiming to be a superchef. Which made two of them. Basic food it would have to be. Which wasn’t much change