‘I made a mistake.’ His eyes locked on hers, sending a sizzle through her blood. ‘I jumped to conclusions when I should have known better. I accused you of dishonesty, of manipulating my sister for your own ends, and I was wrong. Totally wrong.’
Silence engulfed them, but for the soft crackle of the low fire and a faint whisper across the sand. Jacqui held herself taut, disorientated and almost scared of what he might say next.
‘I behaved badly, Jacqueline, and I ask your forgiveness. I realise you were doing what you thought best for Samira.’
Jacqui leaned back, as if to sever the force field that drew her towards him. It was harder than it should have been, resisting the temptation to believe him.
‘How do you know? What did Samira tell you?’ Sourness filled her mouth. How easy for him to believe her now his sister had revealed the truth. Yet when Jacqui had needed his trust it hadn’t been forthcoming.
Asim shook his head. ‘It wasn’t Samira. I knew as soon as I returned to the celebrations and more fireworks exploded. Finally my brain kicked into gear. If you’d wanted to sell a scoop, you wouldn’t have picked anywhere so public. If you’d betrayed us you’d have done it quietly, not surrounded by my people and loud detonations. The whole scenario was wrong.’
He leaned forward and Jacqui thought she saw tenderness in his eyes. ‘I realised too late how strong you’d been, supporting Samira when she most needed it. How much you gave of yourself to help her. I should have been thanking you, not attacking you. An apology isn’t sufficient but, believe me, I’m sorry for what I said, what I believed.’
Jacqui read sincerity in his expression and heard the warmth in his voice, yet something held her back. He’d destroyed something inside her with his mistrust. She wasn’t ready to let him close again.
She’d never let anyone as close as Asim, not even Imran, and tonight’s devastating events proved how dangerous that was. She’d opened herself to a world of hurt. She should have known better. Her family had taught her she didn’t have what it took to inspire love but she’d thought at least Asim respected her. His rejection after slowly winning her trust and her regard had shattered her.
But, oh, it was tempting to accept his change of heart. Her weaker side wanted to forget his earlier contempt and pretend tonight hadn’t happened.
‘If only Samira had confided in me this wouldn’t have happened.’
But it had, Jacqui thought miserably. Nothing could erase it.
Was she being precious, too wary to accept his apology? But nothing had prepared her for the devastation his distrust had wrought.
‘Samira thought you wouldn’t agree if you heard our plans. Your press office has been adamant she remain out of the public eye. She was sure you’d take their advice again.’
Asim frowned. ‘That’s only ever been for her protection. When she first came back she was in no state to face anyone.’
‘But she’s better now. She’s stronger than you think.’
‘You believe I’m over-protective?’
Jacqui shrugged, surprised at how easy it was to talk about Samira instead of what lay between them. ‘Isn’t that what older brothers do?’ She’d been almost wistful, hearing Samira talk about how Asim tried to shelter her.
Jacqui had never known that sort of protectiveness. You learned resilience early when you were unwanted. ‘And your media advisor was all for keeping Samira isolated.’
‘Samira said you disagreed.’
Jacqui shrugged. ‘He could have reassessed the situation when Samira felt better.’
‘So you came up with tonight’s scenario.’
‘Samira and I did together. As I said, she’s stronger than you think.’
He nodded. ‘She is. Between you, you’ve turned the secret of her isolation on its head. The press think she’s spent her time working on what will be a stunning formal fashion collection. They’re slavering for more. That sort of interest could be a springboard to a successful career.’
Jacqui smiled, relieved that he could see the positives in what they’d done. ‘She’s talented enough to do it too.’
‘I can’t thank you enough, Jacqueline.’ His voice dipped to a low note that never failed to do funny things to her insides. ‘You’ve been a true friend to Samira and my grandmother. You’ve given them both something they needed at a very difficult time in their lives.’
His intensity made her skin prickle and she rubbed her hands up and down her arms.
‘It was only—’
Asim raised his hand. ‘It wasn’t only anything. When you arrived here I expected trouble and instead you’ve done my family considerable service. A service that deserved far more than my distrust.’ He drew a slow breath. ‘If there’s anything I can do to make amends, you must tell me. We owe you so much. I owe you.’
Words trembled on her tongue. Hungry, eager words that would reveal how much she wanted from him.
Jacqui firmed her lips rather than blurt them out. She hugged her knees. She’d experienced so much with Asim, more than she’d ever expected, and still she wanted more. The depth of her neediness scared her. Was there no end to it?
Better to keep her distance. After all, though he’d apologised, he’d made no move to close the gap between them. Wasn’t it safer that way?
Yet she couldn’t staunch the slow bleed of hope and happiness. She wanted to be held and caressed and treasured.
The realisation almost stopped the air in her lungs. She’d begun to want too much.
‘There’s nothing I need,’ she said briskly. ‘Except to finish my research.’ Turning from his searching gaze, she looked towards the rising sun, a glimmer on the horizon. ‘I plan to visit the Asada oasis before I leave Jazeer. It used to be a favourite with the royal harem ladies and I want to take photos.’
The idea of leaving was like a physical blow. Her time in the palace had passed too quickly. She’d lived from day to day, not daring to think ahead, throwing herself into her project and immersing herself in the wonder that was her affair with Asim. Each day had been a revelation to a woman who’d thought never to smile again.
But her time was up. Regret shivered down her backbone.
Even if Asim’s distrust hadn’t shattered her illusory peace, the realisation of her vulnerability to him would have.
‘We can do better than that. I’ll take you to the oasis and you can stay in the royal pavilion there. It’s rarely used, but I guarantee you’ll love the old rooms.’ His tender smile made Jacqui’s stomach dip. She almost cried out at the sense of loss engulfing her.
It was one thing to know their affair was over. It was another to find the courage to move on. She couldn’t seem to switch off her feelings.
‘Thank you, but I couldn’t impose.’
‘Don’t treat me like a stranger, Jacqueline.’ His smile died, his voice turning harsh.
Why she fidgeted under his gaze, she didn’t know. He was the one who’d been at fault, not her.
But he was trying to make amends, wasn’t he?
The trouble was she wanted more than access to royal buildings from Asim. Much more.
She wanted his arms around her in the night when she woke from a nightmare. She wanted that gleam in his eyes as they made small talk at some official reception, promising delicious intimacies to come. She even wanted to debate politics with him! Spending a tranquil hour chatting with Asim at the end of the day had become one of her greatest pleasures.
Now