That was the problem. Jamie was changing and growing with each passing day and Nick wasn’t here to see it happen. The commuting had to stop so the fathering could begin.
Before he reached the gleaming white front door, Erica’s father opened it. Walter had a full head of frosted brown hair and a golfer’s physique. Erica’s parents were handsome people, but his father-in-law’s glowering expression brought out Nick’s temper, which he did his best to keep under control.
“Walter?”
“Before I let you in, I want you to know Anne’s in a highly emotional state.”
“You think I’m not aware of that?”
The older man grimaced. “She asked me to tell yo—”
“I know it by heart, Walter,” he broke in. “Though I can’t go back and change the past, I intend to do the right thing for our son. I told that to Erica when I stopped at the cemetery a little while ago.”
Walter’s eyes flickered as if he were surprised by the admission. After a slight hesitation he said, “Come in the dayroom. The nurse has Jamie ready for you.”
“Thank you.”
After three years of marriage—the last year spent in separation while the divorce was being finalized—his in-law’s home was full of ghosts from the past. In the beginning his wedding to Erica had been happy enough. Everyone claimed the lovely Hirst daughter was the catch of the season, but time proved they weren’t meant for each other, and she’d spent a lot of her time here rather than the city.
There’d been unmet expectations and disappointments on both sides. The sameness of their existence had become so severe, they’d drifted apart. The last time they’d been intimate, it had been a halfhearted attempt on his part to rekindle what they’d lost, but the spark was gone.
He followed his father-in-law through the house until they came to the dayroom, a contemporary addition that had been constructed after Erica had moved back with them. No doubt to keep her busy with something to do while she waited for the baby to come.
Anne’s series of decorators had filled it with pots of flowers and rattan couches covered in bright prints of pink and orange. The floor-to-ceiling windows overlooked several acres of garden and manicured lawns that were green and smooth as velvet.
His mother-in-law sat in one of the chairs, stiff as a piece of petrified wood. Nick’s gaze flew to his son, who was lying in the fancy baby carriage. He’d been dressed for travel and was wide-awake.
Nick had no complaints about Jamie’s care, but couldn’t wait to take him away because he’d be damned if he would allow history to repeat itself for one more day. Nick had been emotionally neglected by his parents. Erica had suffered the same fate though she could never admit it and preferred living in denial.
There’d been a lot of damage done. He wasn’t about to commit the same crime where Jamie was concerned.
“Hello, Anne.”
She couldn’t bring herself to look at him.
Nick walked over to the carriage, still awed by the fact that he was a father, that he and Erica were responsible for Jamie’s existence.
The baby had inherited Nick’s long, lean body and black hair, but Nick saw hints of Erica’s nose and bone structure in his face. She’d been an attractive, slim brunette of medium height like Anne.
“Hi, sport. Remember me?” Nick leaned over and grasped Jamie’s tiny hand. One look at Nick and the baby breathed a little faster with excitement. He wrapped his fingers around Nick’s index finger. The next thing he knew it went to his mouth, always to the mouth, causing Nick to chuckle.
So far his eyes were a muddy color and would probably go brown like his and Erica’s. No doubt they would fill with tears when he took Jamie away and the baby discovered himself in strange surroundings. Better get this over quick.
Seizing the moment, he lifted the baby and propped him against his shoulder. “Come on, son. We’re going to take a little ride in the car with Paul. Would you like that?”
Walter handed him the quilt and a diaper bag. His eyes sent a message to Nick that he’d better live up to his promises. “The nurse printed out Jamie’s routine and the things you’ll need after you get to your apartment.”
“I can’t thank you enough for watching over Jamie until now. I promise I’ll bring him back next Saturday for a visit.”
“We’ll expect you.” But Walter couldn’t get Anne to lift her head.
“Anytime either of you wants to see him, just come by the apartment. If I’m at work, the nanny will let you in.”
Anne’s head flew back, revealing a face devoid of animation. “Barbara Cosgriff can’t let their nanny come to you until September. There’s no reason to take our grandson yet.” The reproach in her voice was palpable.
“There’s every reason, Anne. I miss my son and am engaging someone else until then.”
“Who?” she demanded.
“I’m not sure yet. My secretary has been interviewing applicants all week. By tomorrow I expect she’ll have found several for me to talk to personally. She’ll do a thorough vetting. That woman is worth her weight in gold and has never let me down yet.”
“What does she know about being a nanny?”
“Though I realize you can’t comprehend it, she’s been an exceptional working mother for me and that has never changed since she came to work eight years ago. It tells me she’ll know what to look for. Keep in mind that the nanny she finds will only be with me three months until the Cosgriffs’ nanny becomes free.”
That was what he was saying now, yet in fact he had no idea if he would hire the Cosgriffs’ nanny at all! But that revelation could keep for another day. “I plan to work shorter hours this summer, so it won’t be as if Jamie’s alone with her twelve hours a day.”
“If you’d taken more time off to travel with Erica, you could have saved your marriage.”
No. Nothing could have saved it, Anne. But to get into a postmortem with her at this stage would be futile.
“Your penthouse isn’t suited to having a baby there, but somehow you insisted on Erica living there with you so you could be close to your work. She needed a real home where she could entertain.”
His temper flared again, but he managed to keep it contained. “She made it into a place where she could invite her friends after the opera and the ballet. I offered to buy Sedgewick Manor in the Hamptons for her, but she preferred to stay with you because she said it suited her better. Jamie and I will manage.”
Nick didn’t know how yet, but he’d figure it out. He kissed the baby’s silky head. “Thank the nurse for the notes. I’m sure I’ll need to refer to them until I get used to the routine.”
She kept her hands tightly clasped in her lap. “The nurse said he’ll be ready for another bottle when he goes down for his nap at noon.”
“That’s good to know. We’ll be back at the apartment by then.” Hopefully at that point Nick would have heard from Leah Tribe about the new nanny.
“See you next Saturday. Remember you can call anytime.”
Nick turned and walked through the house with his son, still disbelieving this day had come and he was leaving the whole dreadful past behind. It was like tearing off a straitjacket.
When Paul saw him, he got out of the limo. Together they put Jamie in his new car seat. Nick could have done it without Paul’s help, but he was grateful for it because it would probably have taken Nick half a dozen tries to get the confounded thing right.
The