“Then perhaps you’ll fall in love one day and want to marry?”
She came to her feet, face-to-face with him, only a yard separating them. “No, I won’t.”
“Why not? You have so much to offer any man.”
But not you, came unbidden into her mind, and she wondered why her heart contracted with that thought. She knew she needed to say something, but what? Silence stretched between them; the only sound drifting to her was from the people talking on the television show Mindy was watching.
Slade took one step closer. “Why not, Tory? You’re a warm, generous person. You would be a perfect mother. I’ve seen you with Mindy and the other children you work with.”
She wanted to back away, but the chair was behind her. For a few seconds she felt trapped, her heart quickening its pace, her breathing becoming shallow. No, this is Slade. A friend. Mindy’s father. Someone she’d been alone with many times. She forced deep breaths into her lungs and said, “I was badly hurt once.”
“What happened?”
The question, spoken low, the words laced with compassion, focused all of Tory’s attention on the man before her. Painful memories, buried deep, threatened to swamp her. She shoved them back into the dark recesses of her mind, where she was determined they would remain. “Not important now.”
He covered the small space between them and took her hands. “I’m a good listener.”
The warm, comforting wrap of his fingers about hers attested to the man she had come to know, a man who loved his daughter so much he would marry Tory to give Mindy a mother. “I know.”
“When you’re ready, I’ll be here for you.”
His quiet statement mesmerized her. She found herself leaning closer, the scent of his lime aftershave enveloping her in a protective cocoon. He released one hand and cupped her face. She stared into the blue depths of his eyes, no longer stormy but gleaming like diamonds on water. She felt herself become lost, drawn toward his kindness. Was it possible to be more than friends? The honking sound of a flock of geese flying overhead broke Tory’s trance.
She pulled back and to the side, forcing a smile to her dry lips. “I appreciate your offer, but to me what has happened in the past is best left in the past.” When several feet separated them, Tory turned toward him.
Slade picked up the boxes of pizza. “I’d better get Mindy home. I need to call Mrs. Davies and tell her I no longer need her services.”
“Bring Mindy out here tomorrow morning. I’d love to watch her until—”
“Until you decide about my proposal?”
She nodded. “Or, you find someone to take care of Mindy.”
His gaze linked with hers. “I’ve already found someone.”
Moonlight streamed through the window in the living room and pooled on the floor near Tory’s feet. Darkness cloaking her, she stared at the circle of light as though there was an answer to Slade’s question written in it. But for hours she had fought the demons of her past and still she was no closer to an answer now than she was when she had tried to go to sleep at midnight.
Silence surrounded her. Usually she liked the quiet that reminded her she was alone. But not this evening. She wanted the silence to be filled with the laughter of children, with the voices of daughters and sons. Slade had dangled a dream in front of her—to be a mother. And she couldn’t think of a more beautiful child to be her daughter than Mindy.
Pushing herself to her feet, Tory navigated around the coffee table and headed for the kitchen. She flipped on the overhead light and brightness flooded the room, causing her to blink. She put a pot of water on to boil, then sat at the table and waited.
Should she risk marriage to Slade to fulfill her dream? She folded her hands together and bowed her head. Dear Heavenly Father, please help me make the right decision. There’s a part of me that thinks this is the right thing to do. But then my fear takes over and I don’t know what to do anymore. I care for Slade. He’s a good man. And I love Mindy like she is my own child. Please give me a sign showing me the way.
A high-pitch whistle disturbed the quiet, startling Tory. She leaped to her feet and hurried to the stove to remove the kettle. After fixing herself a cup of herbal tea, she sat again at the table, her elbows resting on its wooden top.
What to do? The second hand on the wall clock sounded—tick, tick, tick. Seconds merged into minutes and still no answer.
Nibbling at the back of her mind was the one thing that was stopping her. Being a true wife in every sense for Slade. Could she do that? They hadn’t discussed that part of a marriage, but she wasn’t naive. She knew he was a man in every sense of the word and would want more from her than she might ever be able to give.
With her eyes closed, she sipped at her tea and tried to imagine life as Slade’s wife, as Mindy’s mother. The child’s laughter, her smile, filled Tory’s mind. Mindy’s need for a mother sliced through her defenses, urging her to take the risk and deal with the consequences later. If only she could—
Slade prowled his dimly lit den, too restless even to sit. Beyond the picture window he saw that night had lightened to a dark gray. Soon dawn would color the eastern sky with oranges and pinks. Soon his daughter would be up and ready to go to Tory’s for the day, eager to spend time with the woman she had grown to love like a mother over the past few months. Soon he would see Tory again.
What would she tell him today?
That question had plagued him all night to the point he hadn’t been able to sleep. One part of him was so stunned he had asked Tory to marry him, but the other felt as though it was the answer to all his problems and the best thing for his daughter. And he would do anything for his daughter. The most important was righting what his child had gone through these past couple of years, giving her back as normal a life as possible.
He could still see the flash of red out of the corner of his eye as the truck ran the light. He could still hear the crunch of metal as the pickup plowed into the passenger’s side of his car where his wife sat. And he could still hear his daughter’s screams and his wife’s moans—the last sounds she made before slipping away. There were times when he imagined the scent of blood and gasoline still hung in the air and the wail of sirens shrieked closer.
If only—He buried his face in his hands and tried to block the images from his mind. He wanted to leave the past in the past as Tory had. But every time he looked at Mindy he was reminded that he had survived with only a few bruises and cuts while his family had suffered.
What had Mindy done to deserve this kind of punishment? What had he done? All he had ever wanted was to love and protect his family. He had failed his daughter once. He wasn’t going to again. Tory was the best thing for Mindy, and he was determined to persuade her to marry him and give his daughter the family she deserved.
Standing at the fence watching a mother and colt frolicking in the pasture left of the barn, Tory heard the sound of a car approaching on the gravel road that led to her house. She didn’t have to glance over her shoulder to know it was Mindy and Slade. She cradled the cup of tea and brought it to her lips, taking several sips of the now-lukewarm brew. Coldness cloaked her even though the temperature was quickly rising into the mid-seventies. Her eyes stung from lack of sleep, but her jittery nerves kept her moving.
A car door slammed shut, then another one. Mindy called out to her. Tory turned and leaned back against the wooden fence, waving at the little girl as she headed into the barn to see Mirabelle. Dressed in dark blue dress slacks, Slade strode toward her, tired lines marking his features. He hadn’t slept much the night before, either. Good, she thought, since his surprise proposal certainly had robbed her of any rest.
Finishing her tea, she placed the mug on the post, more brown than the white it was supposed to be. “When