Today has been such a busy day. Lord Robert and Lady Hannah had guests for Christmas dinner and I had to help Cook prepare and serve the food. Both Millie, the kitchen maid, and James, the footman, are ill which meant I had to do all of my own chores as well as theirs. Master Edward was not best pleased when his mother gave me a gift and he scowled at me all day. I am thankful that his Lordship kept an eye on him today for I overheard Cook telling Albert the butler that Edward had got into another fight yesterday. Edward is always so angry. I often wonder why he is that way when everyone is so nice to him.
I overheard Lady Hannah telling the vicar that Edward will be moving to London soon and will be attending a medical school there for he is so clever and bright and well advanced in his studies. I pray every night that he will leave soon and then I will not have to hide from him when he wants to play his silly games. I am writing this by the light of the candle, all tucked up in my bed. I must go now in case he is prowling around and sees the light from underneath my door for he will tease me mercilessly. He is not allowed into the servant’s quarters but this does not stop him for he listens to no one.
30th December 1886
This morning I worked so hard I am exhausted. There is to be a party tomorrow night and Lady Hannah wants the house to sparkle from top to bottom. This is all very well but I feel as if I am the only one who is working, except of course for Cook who always works hard.
I do not understand why Edward dislikes me so. I wonder, if I were a boy would he still treat me the same way? A part of me thinks that he is jealous of me but why should that be so. He is rich and his parents love him dearly even though he acts like a spoilt, selfish brat and is so unhappy. He must be to carry on this way. I have nothing, why would he envy that? My mother died last year and I have no other family. I have been living in this house since I was nine years old. I was given plenty of tasks to complete despite my age but I did not mind for it passed the day.
I have been very fortunate that Lady Hannah likes me so otherwise I could have been sent to the workhouse when mother died. But she insisted I was to be kept on as a housemaid and paid a proper wage. I owe Lady Hannah so much I would never let her down in any way.
Today has been such a horrid day; I have never been so scared in all my life. Edward insisted I play a game of hide-and-seek with him. He told me if I did not he would tell his mother that I had stolen some of her jewellery. I would die of shame if Lady Hannah were to think me capable of such a thing for she is like my own mother to me. I had no choice even though I was scared and knew it would all end in tears. I tried to act brave even though I felt sick to the pit of my stomach.
He led me to the kitchen and stood outside the cellar door. He then ordered me to hide down in the dark, damp cellar. My knees began to tremble so much that I could barely take the first step down into the blackness. I looked around the brightly lit kitchen for Cook but she was nowhere to be seen. She was more than likely with her Ladyship discussing the menu for tomorrow night. Edward smiled at the look of fear on my face; he knew exactly what I was thinking. He knew that I wanted Cook to come in and save me from going down into the huge, dark cellar, which I so despise. I tried my best to put on a brave face for I did not want to show him how truly scared I was, because then he would tease me all the more.
I ran down the stairs into the blackness that waited for me at the bottom. I did not know which way to turn and bumped into something hard, hitting my shin and making me cry out in pain. My eyes began to water and I wanted to fall to the floor in a heap and wail. Now I have a big black bruise that hurts if I touch it. I could hear him laughing at the top of the stairs; finally he began to count. Edward must have heard me scrabbling around in the dark like a blind mouse. I had to keep biting my lip to stop myself from making a noise. I finally found a corner to crouch in and I tried to make myself as small as possible. My blood froze when he shouted, ‘Coming, ready or not.’ My heart was beating so loud I thought that it would give away my hiding place. My skin felt as if there were a thousand spiders crawling over it. I had to squeeze my eyes shut and I covered my ears with the palms of my hands, all the time waiting for him to jump out at me from the dark.
When I could no longer feel my feet I tried to straighten up; I do not know how long I had been waiting. I crept from my safe corner and felt my way around as my eyes began to adjust to the darkness. I knew in my heart he was waiting to scare me. I had lost all sense of direction in these vast rooms and did not know where the stairs were: I was lost. A strange noise came from somewhere not too far away and it was then that the tears began to fall as I brushed against something hard and cold. I cannot say if it was my imagination or not but I thought I heard a low, guttural growl and it was then that I started to scream.
Her Ladyship must have heard me because she sent Harold down into the cellar with a candle to light the way and find me. I was so relieved to see him I could not stop crying and I clung to him as he took my arm and led me to the steps and back upstairs to safety. When we reached the top I felt my legs sink from under me. Lady Hannah was standing there, her face a mask of concern. The kitchen had never looked so cosy and bright. Edward was sitting at the table eating warm gingerbread, the smell made my stomach rumble. He smirked at me from behind his mother’s back. Lady Hannah took my arm and led me upstairs to my room to lie down and rest. She told me Edward would be dealt with and as she turned to look at me I saw such sadness in her eyes. I cannot believe how someone so kind could give birth to such a monster.
5th January 1887
Today I watched with great relief as Edward left. Alfie whose correct title is junior footman but also a bit of a jack of all trades like me when it comes to helping around the house helped him to load his luggage onto the horse and trap. Cook told me his Lordship had warned Edward to leave me alone or he would not be allowed home. I did not dare this to be true, since he scared me out of my wits in the cellar he has not even spoken to me. Two days ago I saw him in the garden beating a rabbit with a stick, the poor thing was squealing at the top of its voice like a baby. It was horrid, I wanted to run outside to help the poor creature but I was too scared of Edward for I know he would like to beat me with a stick. I ran to find Harold who was polishing the silver. Cook told me that Harold then went to tell his Lordship who went outside himself to put a stop to Edward’s cruel torture but not before the rabbit was beaten to death and the frost which had turned the green grass white and crisp was turned blood red.
This house will be so much happier with him gone, I shall be able to carry out my chores without being afraid that Edward is spying on me and waiting to scare me. He has the devil inside of him I am sure of it. On my way to bed I overheard his Lordship arguing with Lady Hannah and I know it was about Edward. I shall mention it to Cook but I know she will tell me to mind my own business and keep quiet. I think tonight will be the first night in weeks that I will sleep well.
Annie was totally engrossed until a loud knock at the door brought her back to reality. She looked out of the window to see a familiar flash of luminous yellow. Someone was looking around the barns. She pulled on the pale blue woollen beanie hat she bought last year just in case it was someone she worked with and then opened the door.
Jake was standing there grinning at her. He stepped forward and picked her up, lifting her off the ground. How did he know where to find me? I never told anyone where I was staying. Annie squirmed and glanced at the man behind Jake. She recognised Will. He had not long passed his sergeant’s exam and just been promoted to detective sergeant in CID. He looked embarrassed by Jake’s behaviour. When he finally put her down she felt guilty for not telling him where she was staying.
‘So this is where you’ve been hiding from me. I leave messages on your voicemail because you never answer your phone. If I’m lucky I get a cryptic text message. Whatever happened to the art of conversation?’
Will looked at each of them.
‘Jake,