He brushed the back of her hand with his thumb, as tender as he’d been during all the evenings they’d spent together in the garden. She wasn’t foolish enough to think he would walk away from his ship and crew at her mere suggestion, but still she wished it might happen, as she’d done so many times since he’d first set sail, until she’d learned he was dead.
Then, he slid his hand out from under hers, drawing away like he used to when he’d tire of her arguments against his becoming a privateer. ‘Not until Vincent is ruined.’
She stepped back, fighting the urge to sweep the dishes from the table. He was choosing the sea over her again and not caring whether it destroyed them both. This wasn’t the Richard she used to cherish and, for the first time since she’d seen him come up the walk at her uncle’s house, she wondered if she’d been as wrong about him as she’d been about Giles. ‘It’s just like when you left before. All you care about is what you want and you don’t care who it hurts, not innocent travellers, yourself or me.’
He snatched the mask off the floor and gripped it hard in his fist, holding it out to her. ‘You don’t know what it’s like to be accused of something you didn’t do and to have everything, your family, your property, your life, your very identity, stolen from you because of it.’
‘Yes, I do,’ she shot back, twisting the gold band on her finger. ‘Giles stole almost everything from me, my meagre dowry, my good name, my belief in his affection for me. He even tried to take Dinah away before he killed himself riding home drunk from his mistress’s house in the rain, but not even his death spared me from more pain and humiliation. Without a son to inherit, the estate went to a cousin and I was turned out and left with nothing except a reputation blackened by his mistress and her catty London friends. I’d never done anything wrong and it didn’t matter because he still ruined my life.’
Tears stung her eyes, and she wiped them away with the backs of her hands, refusing to appear more desperate and lonely than she already did. She still had her pride and the chance to rebuild her life. She had to believe in that for there was nothing else. She raised her chin to Richard in defiance, but her stiffness eased at the change in him.
His fury dimmed and he lowered his hand, opening his fist to let the silk drop to the floor. The man who’d stood beside her at her parents’ graves and listened to her wail over their loss and how it had irrevocably changed everything stood before her again. The life of a brigand had altered him almost beyond recognition, yet echoes of the old Richard remained in the softness of his expression while he studied her.
‘Your husband was a fool. He should have loved you and worshipped you, not cast you aside. He should have been faithful to you, not left you to be torn down by society.’ He brushed her cheek with the back of his fingers, the delicate touch burning her skin. She should knock his hand away, take up the knife beside her plate and stab him for what he’d done to her and countless others, but she didn’t, she couldn’t. His caress disturbed places long forgotten in her marriage and widowhood. It had been too many years since anyone had spoken to her of love and here it was on Richard’s lips, just as it had been in the Williamsburg garden a lifetime ago. They’d both been wounded, their innocence torn from them by the machinations of others and their own mistakes, but with his warm skin caressing hers, she could almost believe that if she pressed her lips to his she might regain everything they’d once meant to one another. She wouldn’t have to face the trials of life by herself and he wouldn’t be a rogue, but the man to help and protect her, to love her as he’d once vowed he would.
As if hearing her silent longing, he slid his fingers behind her neck and drew her to him. She closed her eyes and five years fell away when their lips met. She was sixteen again, her life and heart filled with love and promise. He was no longer a privateer captain turned pirate, but an apprentice to her uncle with a passion for the sea and eager to make his fortune so they could marry. Her tongue tasted his, the spice of wine still lingering on his lips. In the strength of his kiss there existed traces of the honourable Richard she’d loved, the one who might live again if he abandoned Captain Rose. It wasn’t possible, but with his arms around her, his hands firm against her back, she could almost imagine it was.
* * *
Richard broke from her kiss and rested his forehead on hers, the press of her against him like touching his old life. Except all of it was gone and there was no gaining it back. His father, Sutherland Place, his life in Virginia were only memories, just like Cas had been. Except she was here in his arms. For the first time in five years the possibility that there might be more for him in this world than revenge teased him like her fingertips did the back of his neck. Maybe he could reclaim something of what he’d lost, let his men go on to enjoy the treasure they’d collected, to raise families and own land and be free of the threat of the hangman’s noose. He could take his share of the money and become something more than an outlaw driven by hate, but a respected planter once again.
He rested his cheek against hers and over her shoulder caught sight of the desk and the folio with the Virginia Trading Company papers lying on top of it. Bitterness flooded in to kill his hope. If he walked away from this life to chase some dream, he would have to live every day with the knowledge that Vincent was out there, enjoying the very things he’d stolen from Richard, and all the misery Richard had brought on himself, his men and countless others would have been in vain.
‘Captain!’ Mr Rush called from outside, making the door rattle with a frantic knock. ‘Mr Tibbs has spied a Royal Navy ship. We must set sail at once.’
‘See to it, Mr Rush,’ Richard ordered, jerking back from Cas.
‘Aye, sir.’ Mr Rush’s voice faded as he hurried off, shouting orders to the men.
‘Our time together is over.’ Richard slid his arms from around Cas, addressing her with the same sharpness he did the passengers on other ships he’d taken—except she wasn’t like them. He dismissed the thought and the slight prick to his conscience. ‘I asked you for two favours in exchange for your freedom. I must insist on the second one.’
‘You can’t.’
‘With Walter dead, I have no choice.’
‘Of course you do. You always have a choice and, now that I see the kind of decisions you prefer, I thank you very much for sparing me from making the worst mistake of my life by marrying you.’
He ignored her jibe as he removed a pouch of money from the desk. He deserved her scorn, but it wouldn’t stop him from securing her help to bring Vincent down. This was why he’d brought her here and not for any other reason. ‘You will soon have control of the evidence I sent Walter. You must promise me you’ll safeguard it and help me when I request it.’
‘I won’t! Do you know what they’ll do to me if they discover I’m colluding with a pirate? I’ll be hanged and my daughter left an orphan with no one to care for her.’
He stamped out the guilt scratching at him the way he did every time he boarded a ship and faced the terrified souls on board. What he was doing was wrong and might cause her more heartache than anything he’d done before, but she was his only link to Virginia and he needed her help. ‘There are risks, but I will make it worth your while.’ He held up the leather pouch between them, the bottom sagging beneath the weight of the coins.
‘That’s blood money.’
‘If anyone’s hands are tainted, it’s Vincent. At least a small portion of it will finally go to good, to help you start over in Virginia.’ He gently encircled her wrist with his fingers and raised her hand to lay the sack in her palm. Her pulse raced beneath his fingertips and he waited for her to throw the money back at him along with a parcel of curses, but her fingers curled around it instead and he knew he had her. ‘I will only call on you if I absolutely have to and, when I do, there will be more.’
‘I don’t want it, or anything