“She left when I got here. I said I’d stay till you got home. We need to talk,” he said.
“I said all I have to say to you at Helen’s office,” she retorted, standing her ground. “Do I need to repeat it?”
“Maddie, please, let’s not start a scene in front of the kids.”
She knew he was less concerned about that than about having to face any more of her justifiable outrage. Even so, he had a point. Tyler was already looking as if he might leap to her defense. He’d felt compelled to do that too many times lately. He’d been stuffing down his own feelings in an attempt to be supportive to her. It was too much of a burden for a sixteen-year-old boy who’d once idolized his dad.
“Fine,” she said tightly. “Tyler, Kyle, go upstairs and finish your homework. I’ll fix supper as soon as your dad leaves.”
“Mine’s done,” Tyler said, not budging, his expression defiant.
“Mine, too,” Kyle said.
She gave them a warning look that had them scrambling to their feet.
“I’ll take Katie,” Tyler offered, picking up his sleeping sister.
“Goodbye, boys,” Bill called after them.
“Bye, Dad,” Kyle answered. Tyler said nothing.
Bill stared after them, his expression sad. “Tyler’s still furious with me, isn’t he?”
“Can you blame him?” she replied, incapable of dealing with Bill’s injured feelings.
“Of course not, especially with you feeding his resentment every chance you get,” he responded.
“I do not do that,” Maddie said heatedly. “As much as it pains me, I’ve done everything I can to keep them from hating you or seeing how badly you hurt me. Unfortunately, Ty and Kyle are old enough to reach their own conclusions and to see through whatever charade I put on.”
Bill immediately backed down. “I’m sorry. I’m sure you’ve tried. It’s just so frustrating. The kids and I used to be so close, but now Katie’s the only one who acts as if nothing’s changed.”
“Katie adores you,” Maddie said. “She’s six. Even after all these months, she doesn’t fully understand that you’re never coming back here to live. The boys know exactly what’s going on and that their lives will never be the same. Katie just cries herself to sleep every night when you’re not here to read her a story and kiss her good night. Not a day goes by when she doesn’t ask me what she did wrong and how we can fix it and when you’re coming back for good.”
She thought she caught a hint of guilt on Bill’s face, but then the polite mask she’d gotten used to seeing lately returned. She tried to remember the last time his eyes had lit up at the sight of her, the last time he’d actually met her gaze at all. Sadly, she couldn’t. She suspected it was long before he’d announced he was leaving her, most likely in the early days of his affair with Noreen. How had she not noticed such a dramatic change?
“Would you sit down, Maddie?” he said irritably. “I can’t get into this with you looming over me.”
“Into what? Surely there can’t be more bad news. Breaking up our marriage and our family pretty much covered all the bases, didn’t it?”
“You know, Madelyn, sarcasm doesn’t become you.”
“Well, pardon me all to hell!” she snapped, blaming the margaritas for her lack of inhibition. “Sarcasm is pretty much all I have left.”
His gaze narrowed. “You never used to swear.”
“Until recently, I never had anything to swear about,” she told him. “Would you just say whatever’s on your mind and leave? As I understand it, this is no longer your home, so I’d appreciate it if you’d call before coming by again.”
He gave her a defeated look and for an instant, she almost felt sorry for him. He’d made his choice, he was getting everything he wanted, but he didn’t seem all that happy about it. Before she could allow herself to remember the way she’d once loved him, she steeled herself and sat on the edge of a chair opposite him.
“I didn’t want things to turn out like this,” he said, meeting her gaze for the first time in weeks. “I really didn’t.”
Maddie sighed. “I know. Things happen.”
“If it weren’t for the baby…” His voice trailed off.
Maddie’s temper stirred. “Don’t you dare say that you’d have stayed with me if it weren’t for Noreen getting pregnant. That demeans her and me.”
He stared at her blankly. “How? I’m just trying to be honest.”
“It suggests you’re only with her because of the baby and it says you think I’d take you back after you cheated on me if there weren’t a baby to consider. You had an affair, Bill. I’m not sure I could have forgiven that.”
“Maybe not right away, but we might have fought harder to get back on track, to keep our family intact.”
“Okay,” she agreed reluctantly. “Maybe we would have, but that ship has pretty much sailed.”
“Can you at least promise me you’ll do what you can to help me fix things with the kids? I miss them, Maddie. I thought after all these months things would be better, but they’re not. I’m running out of ideas.”
“What you’re running out of is patience,” she retorted. “You wanted everything to fall neatly into place the instant you said goodbye to me, but unfortunately kids’ emotions can’t turn on a dime. They’re hurt and angry and confused. You’re going to have to work to change that. I can’t just wave a magic wand and make it okay. I agreed to let you have as much time with them as you want. What more do you expect?”
“An advocate,” he suggested.
“It’s one thing for me not to say anything negative about you to the children,” she told him. “But I’m not going to be a cheerleader for dear old dad.”
“Did you know that Tyler has flatly refused to set foot in my new place as long as Noreen is there? What am I supposed to do, ask her to leave? It’s her apartment.”
“Ty didn’t say anything to me about that,” she said, just a little pleased that her son had taken such a stand. She knew, though, that he and his father needed to mend fences. Bill had always been an important part of their oldest son’s life. Despite his busy schedule, Bill had never missed a ball game, a school conference or any other activity that meant something to Tyler. Sixteen was the worst possible age to have that kind of supportive relationship disrupted.
“I’ll talk to him,” she offered, backing off her refusal to become Bill’s advocate. She would do it for Ty’s sake. “But,” she reminded Bill, “he’s sixteen and has a mind of his own. I can’t force him to do anything. You may have to give it some time, work a little harder to win him back.”
“I’d appreciate anything you can do.” He stood up. “Well, that’s all I really wanted.”
“Okay, fine.”
“And to say one more time how sorry I am.”
She felt the sting of tears in her eyes and blinked hard to keep them from falling. Just in case one escaped, she turned away. “Me, too,” she said.
She kept waiting for him to leave, but she wasn’t prepared for the quick brush of his lips on her cheek before he strode out of the family room and out of the house.
Now the tears fell unchecked. “Well, damn you all to hell, Bill Townsend,” she muttered, hating that the quick, careless kiss had meant anything at all.
“Mom?”
Swiping