‘Right. Thanks for calling back.’ Holly took a moment to relax into the pillows and she deliberately lightened her tone. ‘So, what do you think? Can you wangle a leave pass for this weekend?’
She crossed her fingers as she waited for his answer. Please come, Brand. I need you.
Brandon’s family owned a dairy farm in Vermont and his dad’s health wasn’t the best, so the responsibility of running the enterprise had fallen squarely on Brandon’s shoulders.
So, yes—it was asking a lot to expect him to get away to New York again so soon. Last month, after Holly’s cousin Chelsea’s sudden and tragic death, he’d taken almost a whole week off to be with her and to help with the children.
That was pretty amazing, actually. Holly had been touched and surprised. Since she’d moved away from Vermont to study in New York, she’d come to accept that if she wanted to see her boyfriend it was up to her to make the effort. She’d grown up on a dairy farm, too, so she understood the demands and she’d been prepared to be the one who did all the travelling. Even so, she’d only been able to see Brandon a handful of times in this past year.
If he came this weekend, she would make sure they had time alone together. She and Brandon had been an item since high school, almost six years. Very soon now, she would be finished with her studies, Anna and Josh would be settled in Australia with their father, and she was looking forward to going home to Vermont to settle down with Brand.
She could so easily picture their lives together—Brandon with his dairy herd, while she worked in the local school, the two of them balancing their day jobs with their life at home, and eventually, with a family of their own—copper-haired children like their dad.
Holly was very happy with that picture, and thinking about her boyfriend always made her feel cosy and safe.
Admittedly, most girls might not place cosiness and safety high on their wish list when it came to boyfriends, but Holly wasn’t looking for a guy who spelled excitement and passion. Her cousin Chelsea, the twins’ mother, had taken that risk and the result had been divorce and heartbreak.
‘I don’t know if I can get away this weekend,’ Brandon said suddenly.
Holly suppressed a sigh. ‘I do understand, honey, but—’
‘Do you?’ His voice bristled with unexpected impatience. ‘Because I don’t understand why you’re complicating this, Holly. The children’s father is on his way at last, so why do you need me? Why do you need my help if he’s going to be there, too?’
‘It would just be good to have your support. I’ve looked after the twins for a month and now I have to say goodbye.’
Holly suppressed a sigh. She needed to be calm and composed when she talked with Gray about his children, and she would have liked a little backup from Brandon. She needed to explain to Gray about Anna and Josh’s schooling needs, their eating habits, their fears…
The twins had been at home on the day Chelsea had collapsed, and it was six-year-old Josh who’d courageously dialled 911. They hadn’t only lost their mommy; they’d suffered a terrible trauma. Anna’s nightmares were truly terrifying.
Holly needed to explain all this to their estranged father, but it would be so much easier if her steady and reliable boyfriend was there as well. As a buffer. An anchor. A safety net.
‘Actually, Holly, I can’t come this weekend.’
The sudden nervousness in Brandon’s voice penetrated the whirl of Holly’s thoughts.
Why was he nervous? Brandon was never nervous. Was something wrong?
‘There’s…um…there’s something I should tell you,’ he said.
‘What is it?’
‘It’s really hard to explain. I…I don’t know how to say this, but…’
Holly’s insides froze and she was gripped by a terrible deer-in-the-headlights fear.
Brandon cleared his throat.
She forced herself to ask, ‘Brandon, what’s the matter?’
‘I didn’t want to tell you before—because of Chelsea and everything…’
‘Tell me what?’ she almost screamed. He was scaring her.
Brandon cleared his throat again.
Holly gripped the phone tighter, squeezing her eyes to hold back threatening tears.
Was Brandon trying to break-up with her?
No. No. Surely not.
Like someone drowning, her mind flashed back through precious memories. The school dance when they’d first met. Brandon helping her with algebra homework at the big scrubbed table in her mother’s cosy kitchen. The familiar, comfortable texture of his lips. The ruby heart locket he’d given her on Valentine’s Day three years ago. The way she liked to bury her nose against the warm freckles on his neck when he held her. The cosy sense of safety that she’d always felt with him…
Now, suffocating panic filled her throat.
She couldn’t bear to think about losing him, especially not when she’d just lost Chelsea. Fear pulled tight knots in her stomach.
Brandon said, ‘You have to agree it’s not really working for us.’
‘What do you mean?’ she bleated.
‘We only see each other a few times a year.’
‘But I’ve almost finished my studies.’ Her voice was shrill now. Pleading. ‘I’ll soon be home for good and we can—’
‘I’m so sorry, Holly. You see, the thing is…I…I’ve met someone else.’
AS THE taxi pulled into the kerb on West 69th Street Gray Kidman was thinking about the first time he’d arrived at this red-brick apartment block. He’d been a bridegroom then, fired with love and certainty and hope, with no premonition of the heartache that lay ahead of him.
This time he knew what he was in for, knew the challenges and the very real chances for failure. Right now, as he stepped onto the pavement and looked up to the level where his children were waiting, his stomach felt like a jar full of jumping grasshoppers.
His hand was actually shaking as he pressed the security buzzer.
The children answered immediately.
‘Daddy!’
‘Hi, Dad.’
Gray closed his eyes, momentarily stunned by the emotion his children’s voices aroused. For three long months he’d been waiting for this. First, the wet season floods had held him up, then a broken ankle after a desperate attempt to cross a raging creek. Now, at last, he dipped his head to the speaker phone. ‘G’day, scallywags.’
Anna squealed, ‘I’ll press the button to let you in.’
‘I’ve already pressed it,’ shouted Josh, full of self-importance and equally excited.
A wry smile tilted Gray’s mouth and the glass doors slid open, allowing him access to the apartment block’s foyer. He hefted his duffel bag over one shoulder and strode with only the slightest hint of a limp across the blue-tiled floor. As he pressed the lift button, he reminded himself that he must remember to call this an elevator now. His kids would be quick to correct him.
His kids…
His stomach jumped like crazy.
Taking sole charge of Anna and Josh was a huge task, probably the toughest challenge he’d ever faced. He wanted the very best for them. If it was