She rubbed the back of her neck. The feel of the man’s breath on her skin and the prick of the tip of the knife remained. Even after a hot shower and neck massage the ache between her shoulders blades remained. Would it ever go away? Could she forget that feeling of helplessness? Fear for the others?
It had been that same feeling she’d had when she’d been trapped in the car with her mother. They had been making a simple trip to buy Ellen a dress. It had been a pretty day but the traffic had been heavy. Her mother had sped up to go through a traffic light that had turned yellow. The next thing Ellen had known they’d been upside down and her mother’s blood had been everywhere.
Her mother had said, “Your father always says I take too many chances.” Then the life had left her.
Slinging the covers away, Ellen slid out and grabbed the thin blanket off the end of the bed, wrapping it around her shoulders. She headed out the front door. Maybe if she watched the rain for a few minutes she could sleep.
She walked to the porch rail. The shower had eased and a full moon was making an appearance every now and then behind the clouds. When it did the soft glow made the raindrops on the ferns surrounding the hut glisten. She stood there, absorbing the peace.
“Can’t sleep?”
She yelped and spun toward Chance’s hut. He climbed out of the hammock wearing nothing but tan cargo shorts that rode low on his hips. She couldn’t help but stare. “Have you been there since I came out?”
“Yep.”
“Why didn’t you say something?” she snapped.
“I thought you needed a few moments to yourself. What happened today can be hard to process.”
He wiped all the times he’d been less than warm away with one compassionate comment. “Yeah, it got to me more than I wanted to admit at dinner.”
He came down the steps and started toward her hut. “You wouldn’t be human if it hadn’t affected you. And you are very human.”
She looked down at him. Her heart fluttered as she watched his half-naked body coming toward her. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
He started up her steps. “That you’re one of the most empathetic and naturally caring doctors I’ve ever worked with. You feel things more strongly than most. There’s no way you wouldn’t be upset about being held at knifepoint.”
“Wouldn’t anyone be?” How did he know so much about her when they’d only known each other such a short time?
He came to stand an arm’s length. “Sure they would, but I have a feeling you were not only worried about yourself but the rest of us. Or what would happen to the local boy if you gave up the drugs. Your heart is too tender for this type of work.”
“I thought caring was what it took to work here.” She continued to watch a small stream of water flow over a large leaf and to the ground.
“Yeah, but it also makes for a great victim.”
Ellen turned to face him, propping a hip against the rail. She was no victim. When her mother had died she’d proved that. “You know, there was a moment there that I thought you might be trying to cheer me up. I should have known better.”
“Look, you did good today. Held it together. I don’t know if anyone could have done better. How was that?”
The corner of her mouth lifted. “Better. But it lacked a ring of sincerity. By the way, I really do appreciate you saving me.”
“That’s what I do, save people.”
Was he embarrassed by the praise? “You make it sound like it’s no big deal but to them it is. And to me it was.”
He bowed. “Then you’re welcome. Let’s just hope I don’t have to do it again.”
This time she had the idea that his words were to cover up his awkwardness at being thought a hero. “It would suit me just fine for it not to happen again as well.”
Chance moved toward the steps. “We have another early morning so you best get to bed.”
“I’m sorry if I woke you.”
He looked up at her from the walk. “Not a problem. The view was well worth it.”
“Uh…”
“A woman in the moonlight dressed in a sexy see-through gown is always worth being woken up for. Get some sleep. You’ll need it tomorrow.”
Yeah, as if she was going to sleep after that statement.
Two days later Ellen scanned the clinic area. Since the incident with the vandals, she looked over her shoulder any time she was alone. Being held at knifepoint had rattled her more than she wanted to show. She had been paralyzed by fear. No way was she going to let on how much what had happened in the van stayed with her. If she showed weakness around Chance, he would see to it that she was sent home. She was determined to stay and continue her work. Ellen was surprised to find that she’d drifted off to sleep after their conversation on her porch. He’d managed to make her think of something else besides what had happened. She wouldn’t have thought that was possible. Had his last remark been to get the incident off her mind or had he meant what he’d said?
She glanced at him working at the next exam table. He was great with the patients and got along with the others in the group. Was even known to laugh on occasion. It was a wonderful full sound. He didn’t treat her differently in an obvious way but she sensed something…perhaps that he was weary of her for some reason. Her assignments were almost always with Michael. That suited her. At least she didn’t have to deal with Chance’s moods or with her uncontrollable thirst to understand him better.
Chance never sat beside her if there was a choice of another open chair at dinner. They were never alone even if they were going to their huts at the same time. Apparently for him to approach her porch had been completely out of character. It was as if she had the plague and he was highly susceptible. Sometimes she thought about just forcing the issue and asking him what his problem was, but why should it matter? She had come to Honduras to work, not to get caught up in the great Dr. Chance Freeman’s life.
And she was working. Hard. It was invigorating. The days were long but satisfying. It was as if she had been liberated from a cage. She belonged here. Her father may not like it but she wouldn’t be returning to New York to work ever again.
Minutes later Karen was called to assist Michael with a patient while Ellen was still doing a wound cleaning. When she finished Karen and Michael were still involved with the patient so she was left with no choice but to help Chance.
“Ellen, would you mind calling the next patient?”
She did as he asked. A highly deformed man entered the tent with the help of a woman who Ellen guessed was his mother. The man had elephantiasis. His arms and legs were enlarged, as were areas of his head and neck. She couldn’t prevent her intake of breath. The only case she’d ever seen had been in a medical textbook.
“We mustn’t make him feel unwelcome,” Chance said from close enough behind her that she felt the warmth of his body.
He spoke to the man in Spanish and he returned a lopsided smile that appeared sincere.
“Ricardo is one of my regular patients.”
“Hello, Ricardo,” Ellen said, giving him her most genuine smile. “Nice to meet you.”
Ricardo gave her the same smile he’d given Chance.
“We’re going to need to get some blood work today, Ricardo.” Chance said, pulling on gloves.
The man nodded and spoke but it came out as gibberish.
Ellen