‘What clothes will I need?’ she asked, trying to be practical in the face of her mounting concern.
‘Something black for the funeral, I guess. It’s cool in New York so make sure you have a jacket. Other than that, just trousers and tops and a dress for going out at night. I can buy you anything else you might need.’
Jess conceded that he could certainly afford to buy her anything she needed, now that he was a billionaire. But she didn’t want him to do that. She didn’t like him thinking he could buy her as well if he wanted to.
Just what was she supposed to be by his side? Girlfriend or mistress?
She doubted he had fiancée in mind. But who knew? Love did make one hope.
‘How long will you want me to stay?’ she asked, doing her best to sound nonchalant.
For ever, Ben thought. But he knew it was too soon to say that. Too soon to tell her that he loved her. He wished now he hadn’t said as much to Amber. She was sure to be at the wake and she might say something.
Well, too bad if she did. It was the truth.
‘As long as you like,’ he answered. ‘It’s up to you.’
THEY BOTH MANAGED to sleep on the very long flight to New York, which was just as well, because as soon as they landed and were allowed to use their mobile phones again it was all systems go. Ben didn’t stop making phone calls during the rather long, slow drive from the airport to wherever his apartment was located. Jess did send her mother a text saying they had arrived safely but her attention was more on her surrounds. She had never seen so many tall buildings, so many people or such thick traffic. Sydney was small compared to New York. She stopped herself just in time from gushing when she spotted the Empire State Building. She wasn’t there as a goggle-eyed tourist but as Ben’s support system during this very difficult time for him.
Jess remained discreetly silent in the taxi. Though, they weren’t called taxis here, were they? They were called cabs. When they finally pulled up outside a swish looking apartment building, she did her best not to do or say anything gauche which would embarrass Ben. But she was seriously impressed, both by the uniformed porter who took care of their luggage, and the doorman who said hello to Ben in a very deferential manner. Inside, the lobby was just as impressive, with marble floors and a huge, fresh flower arrangement sitting on a circular table underneath a massive chandelier. The security guard behind the desk in the corner nodded to Ben as he steered Jess over to the bank of lifts against a side wall.
‘Everything’s arranged,’ Ben said briskly once the lifts doors closed and they were alone. ‘The funeral will be at two tomorrow afternoon with the wake afterwards at Dad’s apartment. My apartment’s not large enough to cater for so many people.’
Not large enough? Jess thought in amazement when she walked into his apartment. The main living room was ginormous with ten-foot ceilings and tall French doors which opened out onto a very large balcony. All the walls were white, which only added to the feeling of space. On them hung some of the loveliest paintings Jess had ever seen. She hardly knew which one to look at first. Or where to look at all. The furniture was obviously very expensive, an eclectic mix of modern and antique.
‘Goodness, Ben,’ she said. ‘How many people are you expecting at the wake if this place isn’t big enough to house them?’
‘Two hundred, at least,’ he replied. ‘Dad had a lot of business colleagues.’
‘What about friends and relatives?’
‘Not too many of those. Dad was an only child and his parents are long gone. So are his aunts and uncles. He possibly has a few cousins somewhere but he never kept in touch with them.’ Ben gave a crooked smile. ‘There might be the odd mistress or two attending, wondering if he’s left them anything. But I fear they’ll be disappointed. Dad told me not long ago that he left everything to me.’
Ben watched Jess’s eyes when he said this, wondering if his being a billionaire would make any difference to her. Quite frankly, he didn’t care if it did. He loved her and he had every intention of marrying her. He understood now how his father had felt when he’d proposed to his mother. Love did have a blinding effect on one.
But Jess was nothing like his mother. Ben felt sure of that.
‘Amber might be there,’ he said, feeling that he should warn Jess in advance. ‘Her father was a close business associate.’
‘That’s okay,’ she said. Though it wasn’t. Not really. Jess supposed there was a small part of her which was curious to meet this Amber. But she could have managed well without the experience.
The doorbell rang. It was the porter delivering their luggage.
‘Leave it just inside,’ Ben directed, getting out his wallet and handing the man a note.
‘I’d forgotten you have to tip everyone here,’ Jess said after the porter had left. What a different country America was from Australia.
‘You’d better believe it,’ Ben said. ‘No tip, no service.’
She didn’t much like that, but didn’t say anything.
‘Will you be staying with me in the master bedroom?’ he asked her. ‘Or do you want one of the guest rooms?’
‘Where do you want me to stay?’ she returned, suddenly feeling nervous. Realising that she loved him seemed temporarily to have banished any desire for the exciting love-making they’d shared. Now, she just wanted him to hold her in his arms and make love to her like they were normal people.
‘With me, of course.’
‘Okay. As long as you don’t…you know…’
His eyes clouded over. ‘You needn’t worry. I’m not in the mood for fun and games at the moment, Jess.’
‘No, no, of course not. I just…’ She stopped, then let out a long sigh. ‘I’m sorry. That was insensitive of me. Of course you don’t want to do things like that at the moment. I know exactly how you must be feeling. When my grandmother died last year, it felt like someone had taken a huge jagged spoon and scraped a great big hole out of my heart. I’m sure that’s how you’re feeling at this moment. Maybe even worse. He was your father.’
He looked at her with such sad eyes. ‘I think he knew something was wrong with him. They say sometimes people have a premonition of their death from a heart attack, even when there are no actual symptoms.’
‘Yes, I’ve heard that’s true,’ Jess said.
‘He rang me, you know. On the night before we drove out to Mudgee. It wasn’t like him to ring unless it was to discuss business. But he just chatted away. And then, right before he hung up, he said, “give my regards to your mother”. I thought that was a bit odd at the time. Now I think it was because he knew he was going to die and he wanted to put all that old bitterness behind him.’
Ben gave an unhappy sigh. ‘I did send Mum a text in the taxi about Dad dying and she answered me; said how sad it was for me but not to expect her to fly over for the funeral. I knew she wouldn’t come, that’s why I went ahead with the arrangements for tomorrow. She believed Dad hated her. But she’s wrong about that. I think he actually loved her.’
‘Yes. Of course he did,’ was all Jess could think of to say.
Just when Ben looked as though he was going to burst into tears, he dragged in another deep breath, then straightened his spine.
‘Dad would expect me to be strong,’ he said.
Jess wanted to tell him that tears didn’t make a man weak but she knew it would have been a waste of time. Her father had never cried in front of her, neither had her brothers. It was just the way lots of