Or the heady rush of adrenaline from being so close to Lina when she forgot herself and transformed into this magnificent, proud, indomitable, desirable woman.
Suddenly all the leashes, the checks and stays Sayid had placed on his baser impulses snapped. There was a roaring in his ears, a feeling of release as he leaned across the desk so his words feathered her lips.
‘If you’re so determined to pay back your debt to me, Lina, there’s a much better way.’
He saw her eyes widen, a flare of brilliant violet alive with...trepidation or excitement?
There was one way to find out.
‘Come to my bed. Be my lover for a week and the debt is cancelled.’
SILENCE THUNDERED BETWEEN THEM. A bold, heavy silence that throbbed with the beat of his blood and the sound of her indrawn breath.
Sayid waited for shame to engulf him at his outrageous, inexcusable suggestion. But it didn’t come. Instead there was relief at finally conceding his need for her, despite the dictates of honour and obligation.
Of course, she’d be horribly embarrassed by his proposition.
Yet Lina didn’t look away. Nor did she move back, though he’d thrust his head so close to hers he was just about in kissing distance. All he had to do was wrap his hand around the nape of her neck and tug.
Would she resist? Would she curse and spit and claw at his face?
Not this woman, he realised.
Not when her eyes blazed with surprise. And could it be? A hint of curiosity?
Not a smidgen of outrage in sight. No embarrassment or shyness.
Lina stared back at him, lips slightly parted as if she couldn’t pull in enough oxygen, breasts rising and falling with each rapid breath, with her face still upturned to his.
Not like a supplicant or a charity case.
Why had he ever thought her shy? Because in the past she’d ducked her head and called him by his title, deferring to him? But of course she’d do that. He was her ruler. Her whole future depended on him. Hadn’t he been fascinated by the flashes he’d seen of her spirit, like when she’d refused to accept his charity unless she could repay him?
Then there was the way she told you she wanted you to kiss her.
She looked at him with the bright, steady gaze of a woman considering his words, assessing him as an equal.
He liked it, he realised with a blast of exhilaration.
Her tongue slipped out to moisten her lower lip and Sayid’s belly clenched. Yet he’d swear the action wasn’t intentional flirtation, not now her forehead puckered in confusion.
‘Why only a week?’
Of all the things she might have said, Lina chose merely to query his time limit?
What a woman! Sayid admired her forthrightness, her lack of coyness. And, of course, the fact she hadn’t instantly dismissed his proposal.
He’d thrown out the proposition because he’d reached the end of his patience. And he admitted darkly, just possibly to frighten her into submission. But it seemed she was actually considering it.
Savagely he repressed a smile, knowing it would surely reveal his rapaciousness. Lina had sorely tested him and now, with the echo of his proposition hanging in the air between them, it was hard to claw back even a fraction of the self-denial he’d worked hard to maintain.
‘I only take lovers for a week. That’s all the time I can spare.’ Having a self-imposed deadline ensured he’d return his focus to his official responsibilities and not be tempted into a life of sybaritic luxury like his uncle.
To his amazement, Lina’s lips twitched. Was that a hint of amusement dancing in her eyes? What had happened to the virago who taunted and obstructed him?
‘Because you’re in such demand?’
Sayid felt a smile tug at the corners of his mouth, until she lifted her hands from the desk and straightened. Instantly he missed her nearness, but he resisted the impulse to stalk around the desk and crowd her.
He was too proud to try to coerce her. Wasn’t he?
‘Because I believe in setting limits. Pleasure can become a weakness if it’s uncontrolled.’
Slowly she nodded. ‘I see. Plus of course you wouldn’t want any woman getting ideas of permanency.’
It was true, but that had never been a problem. Once he’d had his week with a woman she was sent off with a fond farewell and enough lavish gifts to sweeten the parting.
Sayid didn’t bother to mention that his women were usually foreigners, more ready to accept a week of luxury and erotic pleasure for what it was—mutual enjoyment with no strings attached. It struck him that Lina’s attitude reflected the years she’d lived away from Halarq. Most Halarqi women would expect marriage before sex. But she took this proposition in her stride. It seemed her mores were more western than Halarqi now. No doubt she’d sampled those western freedoms. That probably explained too her unwillingness to marry.
He was torn between pleasure that she’d been more amenable to his suggestion and a stirring of vague discontent at the idea of her with other men. Even the notion of her leaving the palace and settling down some time in the future with a worthy husband was strangely disquieting.
Sayid yanked his straying thoughts back in line.
‘You’re not saying anything.’ The lengthening silence goaded him. He was used to women falling over themselves to please him. Firmly he repressed the voice of his conscience protesting that what he asked was scandalous and indecent—taking advantage of a woman under his protection.
Yet the situation wasn’t so simple. It was clear Sayid had to re-evaluate Lina. Yes, she was under his protection, but she wasn’t afraid to stand up to him and speak her mind.
‘I’m surprised.’ For a second she looked away and he wondered if, after all, he was wrong. Was she distressed? Then she slanted her gaze in his direction and he felt that bone-deep sizzle of sensual connection. ‘I didn’t think you wanted me like that.’
‘Even after last night?’ It seemed impossible.
She shrugged, yet he had the impression she wasn’t as composed as before. ‘Men respond to certain stimuli. We were almost naked and I told you I wanted you to kiss me.’ She paused and made a production of pushing her hair back over her shoulders. ‘I assumed it was more to do with the moment than me.’
Sayid crossed his arms over his chest and felt the pound of his heart, heavy and quick. Thinking about that embrace had occupied most of the night, in between devising a scheme to get Lina out of the palace.
Now he decided the palace was exactly the place for her. Specifically in his bed.
‘You assumed wrong.’ His voice dropped to a rough note that made her start. Had he frightened her? She might be experienced but Sayid was a man of strong passions and right now they simmered close to the surface.
Lina tilted her head as if to read him better, but he had no intention of saying more, lest he find himself trying to persuade her to accept. He’d never begged for a woman in his life and he wasn’t about to begin.
‘I...see.’ She fiddled with the scarf knotted around her waist. So she was nervous after all. He told himself to back off, but he couldn’t.
‘And your answer?’ The words were abrupt, not at all lover-like.
‘I’ll have to think about it.’
*