“Maddy, this is just lovely, dear.” Pauline Rowe stopped and patted her arm. “Thank you for setting it up. Now that Thanksgiving is over, we’re really going to get into the nitty-gritty of the planning. Lots of coffee required.”
Maddy smiled at Pauline, who owned the town’s only dry cleaning and alterations shop. “Thanks, Pauline. Let me know if you need anything else, okay?”
An ear-splitting scream punctuated the relative quiet and Maddy winced. “Sorry. I’ll be right back.”
She rushed to the meeting room and found Liam and Lucas in the playpen. Liam was hanging on to the edge for dear life and crying, while Lucas whimpered softly in the corner, big crocodile tears on his cheeks.
Her boys. Best friends one moment, fighting like cats the next, and at a year old, with no verbal skills to tell her what was wrong. She hadn’t been prepared for motherhood, let alone times two. And going it alone? Since Gavin died, she’d really had to fight against despair at times. Like tonight, when she was bone weary.
“Hey, sweetie. Mama’s here.” She picked up Liam and settled him on her arm. He burrowed into her neck and stuck his thumb in his mouth, his wet face sticking to her skin. Her heart melted just a little bit. He was such a snuggle bug.
“You had to bring the twins?” Pauline asked gently. Without missing a beat, she went to the playpen and lifted out Lucas, who stared at her with owlish blue eyes and sucked in his lower lip as he fought against crying.
“Mom’s down with the stomach flu as of this morning. It was...short notice to find a replacement.”
Short notice was her excuse. The truth was, she didn’t have the money to pay someone for child care today. It had come down to food and lights as far as priorities went. Filled tummies and running water were pretty important, and the holidays were coming.
She gave Liam a bounce and smiled, and he placed a chubby, if damp, hand on her cheek. Despite the troubles and challenges, she wouldn’t trade her babies for anything. Things would work out the way they were supposed to. When times got rough, she found it difficult to remember that, but it was what she truly believed. Something good was around the corner for her. It was going to be okay. How could it not be?
“Hello, is the meeting in here?”
Maddy looked up and went dumb for a few seconds.
Cole Hudson, all six feet of him, stood in the doorway. He’d taken off his hat and held it in his hand...of course he had, because he had impeccable manners. His dark hair was cut short, just long enough for his fingers to leave trails as he ran his hand through it, in what Maddy assumed was a gesture of tidying it but really gave it a mussed look. And blue eyes. Blue with little crinkles at the corners. Like the Texas bluebells she’d seen once on a trip she’d taken with her parents.
A girl had to be blind not to get a little tongue-tied around Cole Hudson.
“Sorry,” she said as she found her wits again. “The meeting’s across the hall.”
In her rush to get to the boys, the door to the meeting room had closed and locked, so she dug in her jeans pocket for the keys on one of those stretchy wrist things all the librarians used. She fumbled and Cole reached around, took the key from her hand and put it in the lock. He was standing awfully close to her, and she suddenly found it difficult to take a full breath.
“Allow me. You have your hands full,” he said kindly, swinging open the door.
She adjusted Liam on her shoulder. “Let me get a door stopper so you don’t get locked out again,” she said, looking around, feeling unusually flustered. Pauline still held Lucas in her arms and he was starting to squirm, wanting to get down. Both boys were walking now, but unsteadily, which meant they were an accident waiting to happen when let loose.
She put the stopper in the door, committee members started filing in—still chatting—and she took Lucas from Pauline, so she held a child in each arm.
“Is there anything more you need?” she asked the group at large, holding tight as Lucas twisted and fussed.
“We’re fine, Maddy. Truly.” Lacey Duggan came forward, a smile on her face. “This is wonderful. And you have your hands very full. We’ll come find you if we need something, but really, don’t worry about a thing.”
“Thanks, Lacey.” Lacey was new to Gibson, Montana, and new wife to Quinn Solomon up at Crooked Valley Ranch. Maddy let out a small sigh. “I was kind of hoping to be involved, but...” She let the sentence trail off and gave a small shrug with her aching shoulders.
“Your boys are adorable,” Lacey added, ruffling Liam’s hair.
“Thanks. I’m not usually this discombobulated.” She boosted Lucas on her hip, getting him in a better position. “Work and babies don’t go together very well.”
“Everyone understands,” Lacey offered sympathetically.
Yes, they did. And it burned Maddy’s biscuits that she was reminded of it so very often. As if she could forget what had gotten her in this position in the first place.
Gavin had been a cheater. And a liar.
“Well, I’d better get back to the desk. Holler, okay?”
She pasted on a smile and went back to the room where she’d set up the boys. She dug in her bag and pulled out a sleeve of arrowroot cookies and two sippy cups of milk that had been sitting against an ice pack. “Okay, boys, please be good for Mommy. Please. I have to check the front desk and then I’ll be back.”
For the moment, the promise of a cookie and milk pacified the children and Maddy zipped out to the front desk. The library was quiet; other than the meeting there were no other special activities tonight, thank goodness. Two or three people browsed the stacks, and Maddy quietly went to them and told them to ring the bell at the circulation desk when they were ready to check their books out.
A quick breath and back to check on the boys.
And so went the next hour and a half. A quick check, back to the front. Change a diaper, back to the cart to put books back on the shelves. Slipping the twins into their pajamas, and then back to the drop box to scan the returned books into the system. She could hear the committee laughing behind the door and her shoulders slumped. She should be in there. She wanted to help. Last Christmas the boys had only been a month old. This year they were old enough to be excited at the bright lights and the sound of ripping paper, eating a real Christmas dinner even if half of it had to be mashed.
Maybe she could make next week’s meeting. As long as her mom could babysit...
At five minutes to eight, the conference room door opened and the noise got louder, just as Liam had nodded off and Lucas was finally starting to settle, curled up with a blanket and rubbing his eyes. The sudden change in volume startled them both, and Maddy closed her eyes for a second, let out a breath. It was nearly done. She could close up the library and take the boys home and maybe, finally, get some sleep.
And for right now she was going to let the boys fuss and whimper for two minutes while she saw everyone out and locked the damn doors.
The place was nearly empty when she turned from the circulation desk and saw Cole come around the corner, a very grouchy Lucas on his arm. She felt a definite pang in her chest, seeing her fussy boy being held by a strong man, like a father would. Only Lucas didn’t have a father. He was going to miss out on all of that.
Then