Matthias sighed. He enjoyed this time of the day, so peaceful. So tranquil. It gave him a chance to breathe, to thin—
“Oof,” he wheezed as a little body launched at his back. Jax held on with his legs, his hands covering Matthias’s eyes from behind.
“Gotcha,” the boy chortled.
Matthias twisted, pulling the boy up over his shoulders and flipping him over, making sure he landed on his feet. For a few moments they wrestled, and Matthias enjoyed hearing the boy’s giggles. The memories they brought forth were bittersweet, but today, they were bearable.
He smelled her before he heard her, turning around as Trinity burst through the reeds that lined the river. Her panicked gaze subsided into relief when she saw Jax was safe and sound and doing his best to trip Matthias over. Zane crashed through the undergrowth behind her, his gaze fierce until he saw his guardian prime. Matthias set the boy back a little, and adopted a stern expression. Jax grinned back as he turned to face his teacher, breathless.
“Good morning,” Matthias said smoothly, folding his arms.
“Hey, Trin,” Jax said, giving her a little wave.
“Jax, I was worried about you,” she said, and Matthias could hear the edge in her voice. He arched his brow.
“He was with me,” he told her. That should have soothed her fears. She glanced away, toward the river, as though trying to hide her reaction.
“I needed to pee,” Jax told her.
She nodded, holding up her hand. “Fine. Just—just don’t go anywhere without telling me, okay, Jax?” He nodded, running over to hug her. She sighed as she bent down to enfold her arms around him, and smiled at the lad. “You are giving me gray hairs, boy,” she said, and ruffled his sandy-blond hair.
“Jax, go back to camp with Zane. He’ll get you something to eat,” Matthias said, and Zane nodded, then reached out to take the boy’s hand. Trinity turned to follow, but Matthias shook his head. “No, you can stay.”
She halted, gazing after the boy for a moment. Jax started asking Zane questions, and Matthias had to fight the smile as he heard them chattering back to camp. Well, Jax was chattering, and Zane was responding with monosyllabic grunts. When Trinity turned to face him, he quickly masked his smile beneath a determined frown.
“We need to talk.”
* * *
Trinity gazed back out over the river, for once not really noticing the beauty of the unfolding sunrise. She scanned the opposite side of the river. The ground rose sharply into a craggy bluff. On the other side lay Nightwing, and just beyond that, the rising rain forest that gave way to the Alpine territory. The ridge dipped and rose, a natural border between werewolves and vampires. And yet, their enemy had still managed to camp in Woodland.
She hugged herself tightly before turning to face Matthias. “What?” she asked, impatient. She didn’t care how rude she sounded. She wanted to go back to Jax. She’d been so worried for him when she’d awoken alone in the tent. To find him playing with the guardian prime—well, she was still trying to process that one. He stared at her with that green, enigmatic gaze, the one that seemed to elevate her heart rate, curl her toes and reach in and stir the ashes of arousal. He was so intense, so unashamed by his curiosity of her. He didn’t try to hide his keen interest at all, as he tilted his head, surveying her.
“You really were worried for him,” he said slowly, his eyes narrowed.
She frowned. “Of course I was. I had no idea where he was, where you were.”
“Your concern is like that of a parent, yet you’re not his mother,” he observed. The muscles in her shoulders tightened.
“Jax has had a rough time lately.”
Matthias nodded. “He told me. How did his father die?”
Sadness fluttered around her. Jax’s father’s death was unnecessary and avoidable, and marked one of those times when her pack didn’t behave nicely. “He was killed by the dentist,” she admitted quietly. The man wrongly accused of killing his alpha, the one Rafe had used to hide his own involvement in the crime.
Matthias dipped his head, and the sun peeked over the edge of the ridge, bathing him in a golden light tinged with rose. He was silent for a moment, then grimaced. “His mother isn’t coping?”
Trinity shook her head, surprised at his interest. “She’s pining.” She leaned down and picked a flat stone off the sandy bank, hefting it in her hand. “She’s got an adoring son, and she’s locking herself up in her room.” Trinity hurled the stone and it landed in the river with a distinct plunk. She’d seen it before. Some lycans never recovered from the loss of their mate, gradually fading into the shadows until they finally passed, joining their loved one on the Other Side.
“She’s mourning,” Matthias said, and picked up a stone.
“Well, she should get over it,” Trinity muttered as she located another rock to hurl. She knew she sounded harsh, but she didn’t care. The old anger and frustration rose swiftly, and her fingers tightened around the unforgiving stone in her hand.
Matthias frowned at her. “Sometimes it’s not that easy, especially if they were mates.” He threw the stone, and it skipped a few times across the river before falling below the surface.
Trinity cursed softly as she turned on her side and flung the stone. “The amount of times I’ve heard that as an excuse for giving up.” Tears itched below her eyelids, and she blinked. Damn it, she was over it now. That was all water under the bridge. “Losing a mate shouldn’t have to mean losing yourself, especially if a child is depending on you.”
He laughed, but she couldn’t hear any humor in the sound. “Says someone who has never had a mate, obviously.”
“Why would you want one?” she exclaimed softly, and her shoulders sagged. “Jax has lost his father, and his mother doesn’t see him.” She shook her head. No pup should feel invisible.
“Maybe you should cut her some slack,” Matthias suggested, his tone dark. “You can’t know what she’s going through. Give her some time.”
Anger seared through her. She’d heard that before, too. And all her teenage years hadn’t been enough time for healing. Trinity frowned as she faced him. “Why are you defending her? Why do you care? She’s the enemy, remember. You’re Alpine.”
Matthias placed his hands on his hips as he faced her, his frown harsh. “And yet I’m not the one who sounds heartless right now.”
Shock at his words snapped at her heart. Heartless? He had no idea what he was talking about. She cared. She cared deeply; she cared so much it damn well hurt. She’d seen loss, she’d felt so much stupid, cruel loss, and she’d seen senseless loss. Pining was senseless to her. It was a slow, painful form of suicide. The ring against his chest glinted as he turned to face the river, the muscles in his jaw flickering as he bit down. He was angry?
She shook her head. “Is this what you wanted to talk about? Jax’s parents?” Surely the big, ruthless guardian prime had more important issues to involve himself with than a pup from the enemy pack.
He tightened his lips as though biting off a retort, then took a calming breath before he turned his head to look at her. Even now she could see the anger blazing in those green depths.
“How many day’s trek is it from here to the den?”
She sucked in a breath. Great. Now they were back to that. She almost preferred talking about that old chestnut, parents giving up on their children.
She gazed about the peaceful scene, so at odds with the turmoil inside her. Hell, what to tell him? She didn’t want to take him to the den—she couldn’t take him to the den. Not