Colter looked up at her and frowned. “Are you okay?” he asked.
“Sure. Just fine,” she said, but she looked away out of the knowledge that if he looked at her face he would see just how bad she was at lying. She grabbed the first-aid kit out from under her arm. “Here,” she said, handing it to him.
He took the box but looked up at her like he wanted to ask her to help him.
She glanced over at Sarah.
Eloise took Sarah by the arm. “Why don’t we run along and finish up going over the menu? You were saying something about the shrimp?”
Sarah opened her mouth to protest being pulled away from the man she was clearly moving in on, but before she could speak Eloise was herding her toward the kitchen.
Whitney walked toward the front door, uncomfortable with being so close and alone with Colter. There were pictures on the wall of the staff over the years, and for a moment she stared up at them.
There was a man in one of the pictures from the early ’90s. His hair was slightly longer than everyone else’s and his eyes looked dark, almost brooding. As she stared at his features, something about him felt familiar—perhaps it was the look on his face, or the way that he seemed alone when he was surrounded by others, but she couldn’t quite put her finger on it.
Colter grumbled and cringed as he limped his way over to her side and looked up at the pictures. “This place has seen a lot of things.”
“And a lot of people come and go,” she said, instinctively glancing toward the office and then toward the kitchen, where she could hear the garbled sound of Eloise and Sarah talking.
He glanced toward the kitchen.
“What is going on between you two?” she asked, motioning toward the closed kitchen door.
His eyes widened and his mouth gaped like he was waiting for the right answers to simply start falling out.
“I saw you guys in the parking lot.” She turned away from him, unable to look him in the face as she talked. “I know it’s not any of my business. But I know...I know you date a lot. And I don’t want her to think...”
“She can think whatever she wants,” he said, finally finding his voice.
“So you’re not dating?”
He shifted his weight, but jerked as though the movement caused him pain. “I... She and I, we were a thing once. It wasn’t anything serious.”
“But she’s your ex.”
He looked over at her, catching her gaze. “I would hardly call what she and I had a relationship, so I wouldn’t really call her an ex.”
“I would,” she said, feeling the acidic tone of her words straight to her bones.
He stared at her for a moment before looking away, and her heart sank. She shouldn’t have come at him like that. They all had a past, and if he looked too deeply into hers, she had no doubt that he would find things that he didn’t like, as well. Her thoughts moved to the fire and the man who had caused it.
Colter turned to walk away, but she stopped him as she grabbed his wrist.
“I’m sorry,” she said as he turned to look at her. “I’m just upset. You didn’t do anything wrong. And I have no reason to be jealous. You can date whoever you want.”
It wasn’t as if Colter liked her anyway. If he got to know her, everything would fall apart and whatever crush he had on her would rapidly diminish.
“I don’t want to date just anyone. The only one I’d love to take out is you,” he said, pulling her hand off his wrist and wrapping her fingers between his. “From the moment you came here, it’s all I wanted.”
She wanted to give in to the joy of hearing those words, but her reality wouldn’t allow it. She was so close to losing her job, her place here, and that was to say nothing about the odd things that were starting to happen around the place.
She pulled her hand from his. “I don’t know who you think I am, but I’m telling you that I’m not perfect. I’m not the kind of woman who most men want to date. If you just got to know me a little more, you would see that you wouldn’t want a woman like me.”
“I know you, whether you want to admit it or not.”
She gave a sardonic chuckle. “Just because we’ve been passing each other on the ranch since I got here, that doesn’t mean you know me. You have merely seen me. There are things in my past that a man like you would never accept. We have fundamental differences. Number one—that you have more dates than a fruitcake. I don’t want a man whose attention I have to struggle to keep.”
“Unless we go out, how do you know if we have fundamental differences?” He leaned against the chair closest to him. “And wait... Does fruitcake even have dates in it?”
She groaned as she tried not to smile. He might have been right, she didn’t know if there were dates in fruitcake, but she was never going to admit it. He never ceased to irritate her. He couldn’t take anything seriously—but then again, it was one of the things she couldn’t help being attracted to.
“Just sit down,” she said, pointing to the chair he leaned on. “I will fix your leg. As long as you promise not to ask me out again.”
“Today or ever?” he said, giving her a cheeky grin.
She sighed, not wanting to give him the answer she should have. She equally loved and hated the feelings he created within her. It was so much easier to not give in to her attraction, to keep out of the reach of any man’s attentions. As soon as men entered her life, only bad things seemed to follow in their wake—drama, intrigue and danger.
Love was just too risky—especially with a man like Colter, the most eligible bachelor in the county.
He plopped down into the chair and she went to get the first-aid kit. He pulled up his shredded pants leg, unveiling his bloodied and badly cut leg. Slivers of wood were embedded in his skin.
“Maybe you should go into the emergency room?” she asked, sitting down on the floor at his feet.
He waved her off. “It’s fine as long as we get it cleaned out.”
It struck her how strong he was. He had to be hurting, yet he still fought through it to make jokes with her. She didn’t want to admit it, but he really was an incredible man. Not that she was in the market for a man—no matter how incredible.
“You didn’t give me an answer about asking you out again,” he said as she set about cleaning the wound on his leg.
She patted at the cut with the gauze soaked in hydrogen peroxide as she tried to come up with the right answer. “It’s not you... You’re great. It’s just that right now...” She glanced toward the office.
His face dropped and she watched as the hope faded from his eyes. It was almost as if part of his soul had seeped from him, and she hated herself for making something like that happen. Yet she couldn’t change her mind. She had to stick to her guns.
“Besides,” she continued, “you need to focus on where you’re walking. If you think about me all the time—I mean, look at what happened this time.” She motioned to his leg. “You fell through a floor. I’m a risk to your health.” As the words escaped her, she couldn’t help thinking about how many times that had been true for the people she had gotten close to, throughout her life.
No matter where she went, or what she did, she only brought danger, sadness and loss to the ones she loved. To protect him, and the people of the ranch, she could never love again.
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