“And that will continue for a while,” Gemma said. “But things will settle down. You’ll get used to the idea, and soon you’ll be excited about being a mother.”
“I can’t be a mother,” Lisa said desperately. “I had a terrible mother. I’ve still got a terrible mother. And my grandmother tried, at least when I was little, but she wasn’t much of a model mother, either.”
“You’ll figure it out, Lisa. You’re the smartest and most driven person I know.” Carly gave her a hug.
The warmth of her friend’s arms couldn’t stop the shaking that had suddenly begun.
“I swore I’d never do this,” she said fiercely. “I swore I’d never be careless and get pregnant, and leave my baby—”
“You would never leave your baby,” Gemma objected.
“Lisa, you’re twice as old as Maureen was when she had you and left you with her mom and dad. You’ve got a successful career, a home of your own, a support system. Friends,” Carly said, emphasizing the last word as she gave her another squeeze and stepped back to look at her with an anxious expression.
Lisa took deep breaths and tried to still the quaking that came in waves from her core and moved outward. After a few moments she looked up and tried for a wan smile.
“Right now the question is how are you going to tell Ben?” Carly asked.
“I don’t know, but I’d better do it soon,” Lisa said. “I don’t like putting off unpleasant tasks and this isn’t something that can be hidden indefinitely.”
“No,” Gemma agreed. “And if I know you, you’ll want to have every detail planned well ahead of time.”
Lisa nodded even as she gave her friends a pitiful look. “I can barely form a sentence right now, much less a plan.”
Gemma gripped her hand in sympathy, but Carly looked at her considerately.
“And I had plans,” she went on. She knew she was rambling, but couldn’t seem to stop. “The group of investors from Oklahoma City who are interested in developing a resort on Reston Lake are really making progress on the plans. Can you imagine how many jobs that would bring to this area?”
“So you keep saying.”
“It will be a boost to your business, too, Carly. The resort will need fresh vegetables for their restaurants. If you get the contract, you’ll have to expand your gardens, which means you and Luke will have to hire more employees. As for the rest of the county—between the construction and the running of the resort, it could bring in so much prosperity. I was going to broker the deal if I could convince the current owners to at least consider it.”
Carly frowned. “You can still do all that. You’re having a baby, not giving up your career.”
Lisa barely heard her. “And I didn’t tell you two this, but I’m thinking about running for mayor this year.”
Her friends stared at her. “You’re kidding,” they said in unison.
“It’s true. I would never try to push Harley Morton out of office, but—” she lowered her voice and nodded toward the reception area where Harley’s wife worked “—Brenda wants him to retire and...well, I know I could do the job.”
“Wow,” Gemma said. “Just wow. I had no idea that was even on your mind. Brenda never said a thing to me.”
“We were keeping it quiet.” Lisa put her hands over her belly. “But now...”
“Everything’s changed,” Carly finished for her.
The three of them fell silent for several seconds until Carly cleared her throat. “So you got pregnant two months ago,” she said slowly.
Lisa could see that her friend wasn’t ready to let this go. “Obviously.”
“Ben’s been out of town for months. So how and where? If it was two months ago, it must have been—”
“When I was in Chicago.” Lisa sighed. “At Christmastime. Right after my great-aunt Violet’s funeral.”
“You said you were stuck at the airport during a blizzard,” Gemma added.
“I was, along with a million other people who were trying to get home. By the wildest chance, I ran into Ben. I’d last seen him in September, when he bought Riverbend Ranch and I brokered the deal. He was in Chicago for a Christmas charity event that a bunch of big-name sports figures support. It benefits cancer research. Anyway, he had a room, one of the last ones at a hotel near the airport. He invited me to share the room, and we ended up sharing one of the beds.”
“Oh, honey,” Carly said.
“I never do things like that.” Lisa could feel the tears sliding down her face. “I always think about consequences, about how my actions will affect my future.”
“Whereas Ben McAdams has never needed to. He’s always just taken chances on everything, followed the most fun path to whatever he wanted next,” Gemma said.
“And that night, you were what he wanted,” Carly added.
“It wasn’t really like that,” Lisa told them, resting her head in her palm as exhaustion swamped her. She should have known something was wrong. Besides working too much, she’d thought maybe she’d had a low-grade virus. But it wasn’t. It was a baby. A baby!
Out of the corner of her eye she saw her two best friends exchange a look.
“We wondered why you were so...unlike yourself when you got back from Chicago,” Carly said.
“It seemed to be more than simply your great-aunt’s death,” Gemma added, her face full of compassion. “You didn’t say much about it, but your mother was there, wasn’t she?”
“Yes.” Lisa looked down at her hands, which were now clasping the water bottle. “I tried to talk to her, but she—Maureen—turned away. She seemed very shaken up over Aunt Violet, but I don’t really know how she was feeling. I’ve only seen her half a dozen times in my life, so I don’t know how she would react to anything. She barely talked to me at Grandma’s and Grandpa’s funerals, so—” Her voice choked off and her head dropped forward.
“Oh, that’s rough,” Carly said.
“Maureen didn’t talk much to anyone, except the minister, and then she practically ran from the funeral home. I don’t know where she went. I don’t even know where she lives. What kind of family is this?” she asked fiercely. “I see my own mother only half a dozen times in my life and we don’t have anything to say to each other? How is that even possible?”
“Oh, honey,” Gemma said. “That’s something that started before you were even born and you can’t fix it with one conversation.”
Lisa took another deep breath. Somehow she couldn’t seem to get enough air to blow away the storm of emotions. “You’re right.” She paused, then said, “A little while later, I saw that the weather was closing in, so even though my flight wasn’t until late that night, I said goodbye to my cousins and headed for the airport and got stuck there...or, actually, nearby.”
“With Ben.” Gemma reached for her hand again as Carly gathered her into another hug.
Lisa rested her head on her friend’s arm and glanced up with a rueful look. “You know how he is.”
“Yeah,” Carly said. She and Gemma both sighed wistfully. “Charm in size twelve cowboy boots.”
Lisa nodded miserably. “He was warm, sympathetic and understanding. I was happy to see someone from home, you know? I was so distraught I hardly knew which way to turn, and the thought of spending the night at the airport was more than I could handle. I know I could have called my cousins for help, but the roads were already closed