Though I wish I could.
“You’re saying teaching isn’t like parenting. Okay, I get that.” But Rick still didn’t look convinced.
“If I asked, I suspect you’d say building is your passion. Well, kids are mine.” Penny held his gaze as she made her point. “As a teacher, I want the kids I work with to learn strength and self-reliance. I want them to grow into positive adults with the skills that will help them learn how to manage their world.”
“Admirable,” he agreed with a nod. “But it seems like that’s a lot to ask of a teacher in a public school situation.”
“Believe me, in these hard economic times with all the strife in our country, that is something I struggle with every day I teach—to make time for the important stuff.” Penny smiled. “But this is about you, Rick. And the twins. So tell me a little more about your lives.”
“Okay. Gillian and her husband were missionaries in Mali, West Africa. A little over a year ago he died there in an uprising. She was bereft and moved home with the twins. And then Gillian died—” He stopped. Gulped and started again. “The twins have had it very rough. I’m trying to make up for their loss.”
“You can’t, Rick.” It was hard to say but this man needed to hear the truth so in spite of his pinched lips Penny kept going. “It doesn’t matter what you say or how much you do. You will never be able to replace Katie and Kyle’s parents.”
“But—” The poor man looked so devastated that Penny wanted to hug him. Instead she rushed to reassure him.
“What you can do is be the very best uncle you’re able. That’s what they most need right now,” she added.
Just then Katie walked over and snuggled under his arm. Rick smiled at her, brushed a kiss against the top of her shorn head and hugged her close. Thus reassured, Katie skipped back to where her brother played.
“See? You were just there for Katie. That’s what they need.” Penny couldn’t stifle her curiosity about this man and his family. “Do they have grandparents?”
“Two sets. Their dad’s parents live in New Hampshire. They’re still devastated by their son’s death, and ill health makes it tough for them to visit Tucson so I set it up for the kids to Skype with them once a week.” Rick gazed at her as if to ask if he was doing the right thing.
“That’s very smart of you. Keeping family close to us helps lessen a loss.” Or so the books said. Penny didn’t have any family so she had no firsthand experience, but it seemed logical. She waited but when he didn’t say anything more, she asked, “And your parents?”
“They live near Sonoita, which isn’t that far from Tucson, but they’re kept really busy during summer with the lake, their motel and a restaurant so they don’t come here often. I try to run the twins down as often as I can.” Rick stared at the pair with stark grief on his face. “I think it helps ease Mom and Dad’s loss over Gillian when they’re with the twins.”
“I’m sure. Who helps ease your loss?” The moment the question left her lips, Penny regretted asking it. She sounded nosy.
“You’re asking about a wife or a girlfriend?” He shook his dark head. “I was engaged but Gina called it off after the accident. Turns out she didn’t want a marriage with two kids in the mix, which was a good thing to learn then because there was no way I would ever abandon my sister’s children. Not after I—”
I what? she wanted to demand, frustrated that he left the words hanging.
Penny waited for Rick to pull himself out of the introspection he’d fallen in. She truly admired his sturdy love and commitment for the two orphaned children. Liked his tough determination to do the best for them. He was kind, generous and sincere. Best of all, he was one of those men who paid attention to the most important things in life—like family.
Penny knew that if she took on the twins she’d enjoy friendship with Rick, too, but she’d have to get rid of that flutter of appreciation that winked inside her when he looked at her. He was extremely good-looking despite the scar and he had a warm, engaging personality.
But Penny had allowed herself to fall in love twice and both times it had backfired, leaving her decimated and filled with crippling self-worth. She was better now, more in control. Enough so that she had vowed she would never again depend on any man to fulfill her dreams or to create her happily-ever-after. Instead she was going to focus on making her dreams come true on her own.
Well, with God’s help.
Romance? Well, if it came along sometime in the future, she’d consider it. But she wasn’t going to look for love. Love was something for the future. Maybe. Not now. Not even if Rick Granger made her heart pitter-patter and her stomach beat in time to a Sousa march.
Penny had survived the worst. Now she was looking for the best God had to offer. Getting dumped when her world was falling apart had taught her self-reliance.
Despite this hunky uncle and his adorable twins, she wasn’t going to risk heartache again.
* * *
“Does teaching help you know so much about kids?” Rick asked, glancing at Penny’s bare ring finger. “Because you said you don’t have your own kids.”
“I guess.” She pinched her lips together but when he raised an eyebrow she explained in a tight, strained voice. “I’m neither married nor a mom.”
“Seems like a mistake on some man’s part.” He shrugged at her surprised look. “You’re beautiful and smart and educated.”
“Well, thank you. I think.” The perky smile Penny usually wore disappeared, leaving her looking like a wounded bird, ducking her head against her chest as if she was uncomfortable.
Funny. Rick barely knew her and yet he couldn’t imagine Penny without children around her. She’d been so good with Katie that night at the store.
“You don’t want a family?”
“It’s impossible.” Clearly she did not want to talk about it. “To get back to babysitting the twins. As you know, I’m helping Sophie organize Wranglers Ranch Day Care. That means that when it’s up and running you’ll be able to bring Katie and Kyle here while you’re working on-site building the cabins, right?”
“That’s what she said. But what about until then? And when I finish the job here, what do I do? The twins will still need someone to care for them on the days they don’t attend school.” Stymied and eager for her advice, Rick was pretty sure getting to know this lady would be very interesting.
“I can help you out occasionally,” Penny offered. “And I might know an older lady who could alternate with me, if needed.” Her eyes were once more that desert-sky blue, rich and fathomless. Penny Stern might look frail and delicate with those silvery-blond wisps framing her gamine face, but Rick had a hunch that this woman had the courageous heart of a lioness. “Would that work?”
“Yes, but what about you?” Rick studied her. “Summer is your vacation. Don’t you have plans?”
“Not really. I was going to go water-skiing with my friend and her husband. That’s my most favorite thing to do. But they’re using their summer break to tour Australia.” Penny shrugged as if it didn’t matter. “I’ll probably head to the beach for a weekend here and there, do some painting at my house, volunteer for Vacation Bible School at church in August. Stuff like that.” She grinned. “And watch Katie and Kyle.”
It sounded boring and the very last thing Rick would have thought about Penny Stern was that she lived a boring life.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” When she nodded, he told her as much as he could about his schedule, emphasizing that he often had to change the times when he picked up