Daniel smiled, and looked up and around the train again. Was she there? Was she watching him, like he had watched her? He couldn’t see her from where he always stood, by the doors. He was grinning like an idiot and couldn’t stop. He opened the paper again and reread what she had written. He liked that she’d called him out for being a bit creepy, because intellectually he knew it was borderline bizarre that he was being so dramatic, and making a joke out of it felt … intimate. Like, that was cool, that she could poke fun at him. You had to be comfortable with yourself to poke fun. And to say the thing about the biting and the third date – that was flirty, and cheeky. She’d complimented him, too, which was kind of key. He’d put himself out there, and she was telling him it was okay. It was good – it was an encouraging and funny and kind response. Just the right level of provocative. If he could see her, he’d march right up to her and tell her: drinks, tonight, 6.30.
But she wasn’t around. The train pulled into London Bridge and Daniel stuffed the paper into his bag. He searched the crowds for her face. He kept his eyes and mind alert as he walked through the station, all the way to his own office.
‘Daniel! My man! How’s it going today, brother?’
Daniel fished the paper out from his bag, and said to Romeo, ‘Dude. Check this out! Check it out!’ He opened the paper on the Missed Connections page and pointed at the response. ‘She wrote back, man! Can you believe it?!’
Romeo took the paper from Daniel and read the small section meant for him in silence, his eyes growing bigger and bigger in admiration.
‘Well, she’s a feisty one. Congratulations!’
Romeo held out a hand for Daniel to shake, and Daniel beamed at both the advert and his mate in front of him who knew this was a massive thing for him. He felt a funny sense of accomplishment. Accomplishment, and also slight dread because: what now?
‘You gotta figure out a way to get this newspaper connection off the page and into real life,’ Romeo said. ‘She’s asking you to!’
‘Yes, I do,’ said Daniel, nodding. ‘I mean. Surely I wait for her to be on the train and then just … go up to her and say hello, right?’
‘Sure,’ said Romeo. ‘Sure.’
‘Sure?’
‘Well. Or, you could amp it up a little, you know. Sounds like she’s a gutsy one. Maybe you could build the tension a little bit.’
‘Uh huh. Yeah. Totally.’ Daniel nodded. And then he shook his head because he actually didn’t know what Romeo meant. ‘I mean – like how?’
Romeo folded the paper and handed it back to him. ‘Write her back, man. Make this a thing. If you build up the anticipation, the climax will feel all the better – for both of you. Girls love that shit!’
Daniel nodded. ‘I’m not a girl, and I love that shit too! Romance is nice, right? The thrill of the chase and all that?’
‘You got this, man,’ said Romeo.
Daniel nodded, understanding. ‘So if I write back, it needs to be flirty, like she has been, but also – well, you know on the dating apps when people say “I don’t want a pen pal”? I don’t want it to seem like I’m playing a game where it’s more about the letters than actually getting to meet.’
‘That’s smart thinking, man,’ Romeo said. ‘You’re absolutely right. So maybe what you want is some kind of like, riddle, yeah? A clue that she has to solve. You said she’s clever, so I bet she’ll love that.’
‘A clue she has to solve, but nothing that makes her think she has to impress me.’ Daniel’s face darkened with a memory. ‘My mate Joel always did this thing at uni that he’d read about – do they call it negging? Where you like, make a woman want to impress you by making out that she hasn’t already?’
‘Negging, yeah,’ said Romeo, disapprovingly.
‘That’s some weird psychological crap,’ Daniel said. ‘I like her, and now I know she likes me …’ Then it occurred to him. ‘Oh. Well. Actually that’s not quite true. She likes the idea of me – we don’t know that she’s identified who I am. She hasn’t even been on the train since Monday, so …’
Romeo held up his hands. ‘Do NOT tell me that you’re doubting if she’ll fancy you,’ he said. ‘She will, man. I like girls and all, but I’m confident enough in my sexuality to tell you that you’re a handsome bastard.’
Daniel smiled, chuffed, already standing taller for Romeo’s compassionate words. ‘Cheers.’ His dad’s face flashed into his mind. His dad had always made him stand taller, always believed in him before he believed in himself.
Romeo held out a hand, and as Daniel met it he pulled him in for one of his half-hugs, half-shoulder-bump things.
‘You’re inspiring me to get a bit romantic myself, truth be told,’ he said. ‘I’ve had two dates with a woman I like, you know? Maybe I’ll text her and wish her a good morning, just because she’s on my mind. Nothing wrong with that, is there? If you feel it, say it, and all that.’
Daniel nodded. ‘That’s a nice thing to do for people we like,’ he agreed.
Romeo held out his fist so that Daniel could knock against it with his own, as a goodbye gesture.
‘We’re a right sort, aren’t we?’ Romeo said, and Daniel couldn’t help but agree. Love was in the air, and he was thrilled about it.
Nadia
‘I am going to fucking kill you,’ Nadia said in a voice note to her best friend. ‘I can’t believe you sent that! You total …’ Words failed her. She could not believe that Emma had sent in an email to Missed Connections on her behalf. ‘This hangover cannot process this. You’ve made me sound … cheap! And like I’m some sort of sexy temptress! What the fuck is the thing about the biting? Nobody has made that joke since the nineties, and even then it was always someone’s pervy uncle. I said it ironically, but you’ve not bloody used it ironically. Oh god. If I get approached by some weirdo seventy-year-old who looks like Piers Morgan and has his hands down his pants, I will actually kill you. I just threatened to kill you, but I need you to know I will actually slaughter you.’
Nadia was an hour late for work, and in a foul mood. She’d been on time for work once this week, on Monday, but had forgotten to set her alarm twice after that. Last night she’d had a cocktail after work with her team, and then met her old colleague Naomi for dinner and they had talked so late that she was basically asleep by the time she fell into bed at midnight – again forgetting to set an alarm. That meant she’d woken up this Thursday morning with a start, had to rush to shower, and hadn’t had time to fully assess if her outfit actually looked like an outfit or was mismatched in a way she couldn’t pass off as cool. She’d have to start The New Routine to Change My Life again tomorrow. Or maybe on Monday.
‘Don’t act like you’re mad!’ said Emma, when she eventually called back in response to the scathing voice note. ‘It’s a cute advert. I did you a favour! And I promise I didn’t do it when we were drunk. I saved it in drafts and only sent it yesterday, when I was sure it was a good one.’
‘It’s not a good one! It’s awful!’ said Nadia, determined to give her a hard time for doing it without her permission. I don’t bite?! What was Emma thinking?
‘No! It is a good one! I 200 per cent know in my bones