Lewis’s shooting had brought it all back, the grief, the fear, the anger. So far she’d managed to keep her feelings firmly under wraps, shocked by the sudden eruption of violence outside the cinema and panicked by her loss of control on the sidewalk. Maybe that had been a mistake. She should have allowed herself to cry, taken the sleeping pills the doctor had prescribed so she could at least have gotten some sleep. McCabe wouldn’t appreciate having a weeping female on his hands.
Offering her a shoulder to cry on was probably right up there with shopping and cross-dressing.
Chapter 5
Ben loaded Roma’s suitcase into the back of his truck. The case was another detail about Roma Lombard that didn’t fit. It was leather and expensive, but it was battered. He had expected her to have a full set of Louis Vuitton, at the very least.
She didn’t wait for him to open her door or to assist her into the passenger seat, for which he was thankful. He didn’t want to lay one finger on his client’s soft, sleek hide if he could help it. Occasionally, in the line of duty, he would have to, but he would keep those instances to a minimum. Bodyguarding required a certain distance, a sharp awareness of surroundings and clear tactical thinking, and he couldn’t guarantee any of those things if he let himself get too close to Roma Lombard.
He was good at what he did; that was why he’d chosen security and VIP protection as a career option after leaving the SAS. But he also knew his own nature. He had a healthy libido and an appreciation of beautiful women. If they became intimate—and given his awareness of her as a woman, he had to anticipate that problem—he would instantly replace himself, because he would have compromised his effectiveness.
He tossed the envelope Gray had given him on the back seat of the extended cab truck, removed the Glock from the small of his back and stowed it, then swung behind the wheel and slid dark glasses onto the bridge of his nose. He opened his window to dissipate some of the heat that had built up inside. Despite the early hour, the temperature was climbing steadily. Already his T-shirt was sticking to his back, and a fine sheen of sweat dampened his skin. He was still aroused, which made sitting uncomfortable, but he kept his expression neutral. There was no point in getting wound up when he couldn’t do a thing about it.
Roma was silent as he negotiated the crammed car park, her head turned away from him as she looked out the passenger window.
Ben frowned as he nosed into traffic. He’d been hard on her. He hadn’t bothered to hide his dislike of a situation that had been sprung on him at the last minute. Normally he was scrupulously fair with clients, no matter what the circumstances were or who they were. Normally he was friendly.
But nothing about this situation even approached normal. The second he’d laid eyes on Roma Lombard, he’d been knocked off balance.
A welcome breeze began circulating through the overheated cab, and he caught the faint drift of a light, feminine perfume. The throb in his groin deepened into a persistent ache that told him he hadn’t had sex in too long and that it was past time he took care of that particular need. He’d been too busy caring for his daughter, Bunny, and setting up his new business to look after that part of his life, but that was going to have to change. He knew from experience that ignoring his sex drive only made his state of arousal more intense. Sometimes, when he’d been on a military assignment for a prolonged period, he’d become almost savage with lust. He’d never lost control, but when he found a willing bed partner he would stay on her the entire night, keeping her beneath him and having her until the hungry ache finally left him.
A bed partner was what he needed now, a woman who could provide him with regular, hard-driving sex when he needed it and who didn’t ask for anything more. Maybe it was a cold way to approach obtaining something as intimate as making love, but Ben had long since replaced romanticism with practicality. For him it was a simple physical equation, minus the hearts and flowers. When he was younger, he’d been wild, his judgement lousy. He’d let sex cloud his thinking, and the mistake had changed his life permanently. He couldn’t afford to make another mistake now; he had Bunny’s needs to consider. If he took a woman to bed, he was careful to lay down the ground rules first.
If, and when, he wanted a relationship of a permanent kind, it would be of his choosing. And this time he would choose his future wife with the contents of his head and not his pants.
He stopped for a set of lights. With the cessation of movement, the cooling breeze died and the cab instantly warmed. Roma leaned forward, the movement drawing his eye so that he watched as she reached into her holdall, extracted a bottle of water and took a swallow, before recapping and replacing the bottle. Her hands were slim, the nails short but nicely shaped, her movements graceful and completely feminine. Despite the heat and the heavier clothes she’d worn for the early-morning flight, she looked as cool as a cucumber and so composed it was hard to believe she’d saved a man’s life on a bloodied sidewalk two nights ago.
The lights changed. Ben shifted gear, accelerating smoothly.
If he decided he wanted Roma Lombard, he thought calmly, then he would have her, but it was either strictly business, or bed. He couldn’t protect her if he couldn’t keep his mind out of her pants.
Roma avoided looking at McCabe as he drove. Instead, she rested her head against the seat and watched the industrial areas and the housing estates flash by, letting the hum of the engine and the monotony of the view dull the throbbing in her head. Her lids drooped, the drag of sleep almost taking her under. Her eyes popped wide. She lifted her head off the headrest and forced herself to sit straighter and take an interest in the view. The thought of falling asleep in the presence of McCabe was subtly alarming; she was already vulnerable enough.
After a few minutes she noticed they were headed south into suburbia, rather than into the centre of town. Curiously she noted the signs. Gradually the houses thinned out into expensive rural lifestyle blocks, interspersed by tracts of pasture. The country was getting wilder by the second, and she wondered with a flicker of amusement if McCabe had consigned the whole idea of guarding her to the too-hard basket and was planning to knock her off and dump her body.
Eventually they turned down a gravel drive flanked by leafy jacaranda trees. There was open country on either side, where horses grazed contentedly, and in the distance, Roma caught tantalising glimpses of what must be the Waitemata Harbour.
They pulled up at a large cedar-and-brick home, which was comfortably nestled into mature gardens. A broad sweep of lawn was dominated by a large, gnarled oak. A simple rope swing hung from the oak, and a bright pink bike lay nearby, abandoned at a drunken angle next to a sandpit.
‘‘Won’t be a minute,’’ McCabe said, placing his sunglasses on the dash and climbing out of the truck.
The front door was flung open as he walked across the lawn. A small tornado of a girl erupted from the house, yelling, ‘‘Daddy, Daddy!’’
She ran full-tilt at McCabe and wrapped herself around his legs.
McCabe’s back muscles flexed and bunched, shifting smoothly beneath the damp cling of his T-shirt as he swung his daughter up into his arms. He twirled her around in a circle before wrapping her close. The little girl planted a kiss on his nose, and he grinned, white teeth flashing against his stubbled jaw as he returned the favour. She giggled and tugged at his hair.
Roma watched, still punchy with tiredness, but transfixed by the change in McCabe. She’d had him pegged as tough and rude and objectionable, but right now he looked like the poster boy for fatherhood.
The little girl demanded to be let down, commandeered his hand and tugged him over to the bike, then stood, hands on hips, as McCabe went down on his haunches to put the chain back on, his movements fluid and unhurried. He looked relaxed and content, completely at home in his role as a parent. A sharp little ache started in her chest as she watched McCabe and his child together.