A still-shaky—and, Kevin was guessing, somewhat sheepish—Julianne extricated herself from her father’s arms. “Are you all right?” Victor murmured, worried, one hand on her shoulder. She nodded, shoving tears off her cheeks, and nausea walloped Kevin all over again.
“It’s Pippa’s bedtime,” she said, fixing Kevin with watery eyes, her expression a weird mix of sympathy, resignation and an anguish so deep Kevin’s heart squeezed in response. “Besides, the tension’s not good for her.”
Since the baby had begun to cry for real, even Kevin had to concede that point. Especially since he figured things were only going to get more intense. Julianne wiped her palms down her dress, then held out her arms. “You can check on her before you leave. Promise.”
Kevin handed Pip over, then watched them leave. “Do you even love her?” Victor asked behind him.
Startled, Kevin turned. “What?”
“Pippa. Is this about loving her, or just staking your claim?”
“Any reason it can’t be both?”
“Julianne said you looked scared to death when you first saw her.”
“Hell, I felt like I’d been knocked into next week with a wrecking ball. That doesn’t mean I don’t love her. Or don’t you believe in love at first sight?”
“You’re not going to rack up any points by being a smart-ass, Mr. Vaccaro.”
“And if it’d been up to you, I would’ve never even found out about my daughter. Believe me, winning points with you is the last thing on my mind.”
“I ran a background check on you, young man,” Victor said, his gaze never leaving Kevin’s. “Long before you showed up. So I know that in the past ten years, you haven’t held down any job for longer than six months. That you haven’t stayed in one place longer than six months. That you’ve had your license suspended twice for DUI and were busted once for possession.”
“Then you knew exactly where to find me all along, didn’t you?” When the older man didn’t answer, Kevin let out a dry laugh. “Well. Look on the bright side—at least I never applied for the job of son-in-law.”
Victor’s mouth pulled even tighter. If that was possible. “I was only thinking of Pippa’s welfare—”
“Because you think I’m scum. Got it. And to be fair, I can see where you’re coming from. Sort of. But unless you hired a really crappy P.I., you also know I successfully completed a three-month rehab program and that my record’s been spotless since. And the DUIs were years ago. Or doesn’t any of that count?”
“I’ve already lost Pippa’s mother,” Victor said. “Damned if I’m going to lose Pippa, as well.”
A splotch-faced Julianne inched back into the room, still hugging herself, clinging to her composure with everything she had. Kevin wished like hell there was some way to keep her from being part of the collateral damage.
“You don’t have to stay, Julie-bird. Kevin and I can handle this—”
“I’m fine. And anyway, this concerns me, too.” Her eyes touched Kevin’s. “Right?”
“Absolutely,” Kevin said before her father could protest. Then he pushed out a breath. “Okay, maybe on paper I don’t come across so good. And I know I’ve got this problem with shootin’ off at the mouth and sounding like I don’t take things as seriously as maybe I should. But I would think if anybody would recognize a defense mechanism, Mr. Booth, it would you be you.”
Victor’s brows lifted, and Kevin thought, Gotcha. “Yeah, I’ve read a couple of your books. My counselor in rehab was a big fan. Surprise, right? But it’s like I told Julianne earlier—I’m not that idiot kid anymore. Haven’t been for some time. Which means I know my present situation isn’t exactly ideal. In fact, since I found out about Pip this morning? I’ve been pretty much a mess, trying to figure out how to make this work. But the only thing I knew, the only thing I still know, is that I’m not about to duck my responsibility.” He hesitated. “Not like Robyn’s mother did to her. To both of you,” he directed to Julianne, who looked like she’d been clobbered over the head with a large stick.
A deathly quiet fell over the room. “Is that what Robyn told you?” Victor finally said. “That her mother killed herself to duck her responsibility?”
“I’m guessing that’s how Robyn saw it,” he said, realizing his mistake as it finally registered how much this family had been through. “Whatever the reasons, that had to be rough on a twelve-year-old. No wonder she was so messed up.”
Of course, her father’s obsessive determination to make up for what Robyn had seen as her mother’s betrayal had a lot to do with Robyn’s behavior, too. Even Kevin could figure out that the harder Victor had tried to compensate, the more stubbornly she’d withdrawn. But that was a road probably best left unexplored, at least for now. “Look, all you know about me is what you see in those reports—”
“And what my daughter said about you.”
“No offense, sir, but Robyn probably wasn’t entirely objective when it came to me. We didn’t exactly have an amicable breakup.”
“He’s right, Dad,” Julianne said, and Kevin’s eyes cut to her profile. “You know yourself Robyn’s talent at shaping whatever she said to fit the moment.” Then, to Kevin, “It’s true, she never really did get over our mother’s suicide—”
“Julie, this is none of his business—”
“Of course it is,” she said with surprising strength. “Like it or not, Pippa’s existence makes Kevin part of the family. And he deserves to know as much about Robyn as we can tell him. Especially if…if he’s going to take her to the other side of the country.”
Was the chick wack or what? It had to be killing her, to back him up like this. So why the hell was she doing it?
“Even on her good days,” Julianne said, “Robyn wasn’t known for her objectivity. After Mom died…” She sighed. “She was still a kid. And no matter how many times we told her that Mom had been sick, that her death had nothing to do with anything we did, it was obvious she never quite believed us. Of course, I don’t suppose it helped that Mom had promised to take her out for a rare just-the-two-of-them shopping and lunch spree the next day.”
Kevin groaned, even as he caught the sag of failure in Victor’s shoulders. “Yeah,” Julianne said, “it was pretty bad. How do you convince a child not to take something like that personally?”
And how did you take it? Kevin wondered, watching her. “From then on,” Julianne continued, “every slight, real or perceived, got blown completely out of proportion. And she hated being the one broken up with.”
Gus nosed her hand. Smiling slightly, she gave him a pat, then looked back at Kevin, her brow pinched. “However valid your reasons for leaving her may have been, no matter how she really felt about you, all Robyn saw was that you’d screwed her over. That sent you straight to the top of her S-list,” she said with a slight smile. “So you’re absolutely right—she definitely wasn’t a reliable source. Especially about you.”
Not exactly a wholehearted endorsement, but better than a kick in the ’nads. “Mr. Booth,” Kevin said after a moment, “it’s not like I don’t understand how this is hard for you. Especially since you don’t know me worth squat. You also don’t know my family, who were every bit as hurt by what I did as you were with Robyn. Believe me, if I go back there? If they thought I was even thinking about slipping back into old habits, they’d take the baby away from me. They’re good people, Mr. Booth. They don’t live in fancy houses or drive expensive cars, and all the kids go to public schools, but dammit…”
His