Jim knew firsthand how hard it was to meet that particular challenge and the expectations that went along with treading out onto that shaky limb. Sometimes the fear of failure was the scariest part of all.
He thought about his wife and baby girl. There wasn’t a day that passed that Jim didn’t consider whether or not he could be the man, the husband and father, those two needed him to be.
Was starting his own venture part of that whole I-don’t-want-to-fail scenario? With his own business he would set the rules, answering only to himself. No one else would be holding a preconceived measurement or standard of success against his every endeavor.
The thought had crossed his mind, more than once if he admitted the truth.
Just a little baggage of his own he had to carry around until he got past it.
Jim drove to the South Loop and took the exit that led to his new suite of offices. The old brownstone needed some renovation but nothing he couldn’t handle in time.
After parking in the back alley, he unlocked the rear entrance and flipped on the lights. He should have gone home. Tasha would be wondering if he planned to make every night a late night. But he’d wanted to check the answering machine before going home. He’d made a few calls this afternoon, and he hoped to get some timely responses.
He made his way to the front room that was now a lobby, turning on lights as he went. When he was halfway up the stairs to the second floor the doorbell buzzed; someone was at the door.
His first thought was that Tasha had come to drag him home, but bringing Jamie out in the blustery February weather wasn’t his wife’s technique. She’d call and order him to get home.
Could be his first customer. He had hung up a shingle of sorts today.
Or, if he was lucky, it would be Anders to come to say he’d thought about Jim’s offer and wanted the job.
A grin slid across Jim’s face as he opened the door and identified his visitor. None of the above.
“Mom.” He leaned against the door frame and crossed his arms over his chest. “Come to see what I’ve done with the place?”
Victoria Colby-Camp returned his smile. “I’m sure you haven’t had time to do that much. But you’ll get it done.”
That she believed in him so completely no matter how many times he missed the mark or fell down as he tried to turn his life around still surprised him. She was a hell of a mom for a guy who’d gone as low as it was humanly possible to go.
He glanced past her. “Where’s your other half?” Victoria rarely went anywhere without Lucas unless he was out of town and she had no other choice. The two were inseparable.
“He’s keeping your lovely wife and our granddaughter company while dinner gets cold.”
Dinner. Oh, man. He’d forgotten. Dammit.
“Just let me check my voice mail and lock up and I’m on my way.”
“I’ll ride along with you,” she offered. “Lucas can bring me by to pick up my car later.”
Jim let the smile nudging at his lips do what it would. He’d never been big on smiles, but these days the women in his life knew how to draw them out of him. His mother knew him all too well. If she didn’t ensure he got going he would get distracted and end up hanging around another hour.
“Sure. Gimme a sec.”
He bounded up the stairs and into his office. The second floor would serve as his private office and a conference room. The lobby, other offices, and a small kitchen-turned-employee-lounge would take up the downstairs space. Assuming he ever had any employees. Monday morning he would interview receptionist candidates. He had three applicants so far.
The blinking red light on his answering machine signaled that he had at least one message.
Anticipation roiled through him as he pressed the button. He waited through the announcement that he had two new messages. The first was from Renee Vaughn, a former assistant district attorney from Atlanta. They had spoken by phone yesterday. She was interested in a position at his firm. He was definitely interested in her.
“Mr. Colby,” her voice rang out with the strength only a real fighter possessed, “this is Renee Vaughn. I’ve decided to fly in for a face-to-face before I make a final decision. I’m hoping two-thirty on Monday will work for you. Call my cell if anything comes up.” She rattled off the number and the call ended.
“One down and two to go,” Jim murmured. His goal was to start out with three associates. He hesitated to call them investigators. The work they would do here wouldn’t always involve investigating, at least not in the usual sense.
“Mr. Colby, this is Spencer Anders,” floated from the answering machine next. The noise in the background told him Spencer had still been at the bar when he called. At least he’d called.
Jim resisted the urge to shout “yes!”
“I’ve been thinking about your offer and I’d like to talk to you again. I’ll come by your office Monday morning about nine…if you’re still interested…. We’ll go from there and see what happens.”
His trepidation was crystal-clear, but Jim had no doubts. Anders was exactly the kind of associate he wanted on his team. He’d have to thank Lucas for tipping him off to the guy’s availability. That Anders had reacted so quickly, if not decisively, indicated an underlying desire to get his life back on track.
A big load off his shoulders, Jim headed down to rendezvous with Victoria. This news gave him something to celebrate at the family dinner tonight.
“Ready?” Victoria asked as he joined her in the soon-to-be lobby.
“I am now.” He followed his mother out the front door and locked up.
“I see you’ve officially hung your shingle.”
This was a kind of running joke between them now that he’d actually started classes at the University of Chicago last semester. Taking only one or two classes at a time, completion of the program would require years and years. He was prepared to accept the wait. No matter how long it took he wanted to obtain his law degree. The goal meant a lot to him and even though his mother would never say so, he knew that accomplishment would mean a lot to her as well. She insisted that he was perfect just as he was, but then, she was his mother. His wife was extremely pleased as well.
Jim glanced up at the brand-new sign he’d hung next to the front entrance. Pride welled in his chest. He had made this happen, with a lot of support from the people he loved. “Yep, it’s official now.”
The Equalizers were about to open for business.
Chapter Two
Monday, February 21
Spencer Anders remained in his car for an additional twenty minutes. He’d made up his mind. The hesitation was unnecessary, but here he sat. Nine-fifteen. He’d told Colby he’d be in around nine.
Why the hell had he done that? The impulse had hit him less than half an hour after Colby had walked out of the joint that had been Spencer’s second home since he’d arrived in the Windy City. He used the pay phone at the end of the bar and made the call.
What the hell had he been thinking?
That he had to get his life back? That somehow, things had to start making sense again before he lost himself completely?
Yes to both of the above.
Spencer moistened his lips and fought back the craving for a drink. One didn’t go with the other. If he was going to make this work he had to keep his head together.
He could do it.
He banished the nagging voice that tried to tell him otherwise.
“No going backward,”