It was hard not to stare at her. Alaina captivated his attention, his thoughts.
Seeing her in this house he wondered if surprising her with the beach house after finding out they would need fertility treatments a few years ago had been the right call. Should he have had her pick out a house with him instead? He’d cut her out of the decisions sometimes, telling himself he was surprising her. Yet then she was stuck pretending to be pleased.
He needed to set his mind on ways to fix that in the future, when he was considering major changes like remodeling or even relocation. Big changes he couldn’t tackle right this second. But he could—and wanted—to do something special for her now, something she would like.
After they were back in the car, Porter started to drive toward a place they hadn’t been to in ages. Fishin’ Franks—her favorite restaurant. He wanted today to be special.
* * *
Lunch was absolutely delicious. Cajun fish tacos. Fresh avocados. Live music.
All things considered, Alaina was having a decent time being out of the beach house today. Porter was as charming as ever, completely sensitive to her every whim and desire. And to Thomas. Seeing them together made her heart surge. Porter was dedicated to the boy. Completely devoted to becoming a family.
For a moment, she considered what it would be like if her memories never came back.
Maybe this was all they needed. A completely fresh start. A new house for a new family. A house like the one at the job site. One that fed into her eclectic sensibilities and symbolized their new life together.
She could practically picture Thomas taking his first steps on the driftwood-colored hardwood floors. And art hanging all over the living room.
As they walked into the Baby Supplies Galore store, she scanned the faces of the other shoppers. In true Florida Christmas fashion, babies were dressed in shorts and tanks that sported flamingos in Santa hats.
The aisles were packed with late-December holiday shoppers. Christmas music mingled with the rush of families debating gifts.
Porter kept stride next to her as she pushed the cart down the least crowded aisle. His hand went almost instinctively to the small of her back. The warmth of his touch begged her to recall their past again. It clouded her sense of the present. Even knowing that they could be a family with a fresh start, she yearned to remember what they’d shared.
“What was the best present you ever received from me for Christmas?” she asked, looking at the blanket sets.
Glancing at the prices, Alaina quickly realized this was a high-end baby store. Just one item probably cost as much as five of her childhood Christmases altogether. This was a completely different level of shopping.
“Hmm. There was one year that you did a painting based on the blueprint of the building project that launched my career. I loved that. It’s hanging above my desk in my office.”
“I’d like to look at that more closely. Get an idea of the direction of my art. And what was my favorite Christmas present from you?”
“I think the best gift I ever gave you may have been the surprise trip to Paris. We spent a week in art galleries eating brie and bread.”
“Ah, bread and cheese. Such a solid combination.” She laughed to cover her regret that she couldn’t remember what sounded like a beautiful trip. “What about your Christmases as a child?”
She slowed down beside a tower of holiday-themed baby rattles—penguins with red-and-green scarves, polar bears with fuzzy hats and deer with jingle bells.
“My mom went all out. Good God, she went all out. Mom’s a lawyer. Did I tell you that?” He plucked a snowy owl out of a bin and waggled it in front of the baby, who rewarded him with a gummy grin.
“I don’t believe anyone thought to tell me that detail, actually.” She’d taken in so much information in such a short time it was hard to keep the facts straight. “I assumed she was independently wealthy. She took time off to be here? That’s really sweet.”
He waggled his hand. “Taking time off work is a way to put it, I guess. My mother sneaks off to work just like I do. Neither of us has ever been big on sleep.”
“That’s funny, given the impression she relays, snoozing in, preferring the baby be asleep.”
“That’s my mom. Contrary.”
Alaina hugged a stuffed bear against the ache in her chest. “I wish my mother could be here to meet Thomas. She would love him.”
His forehead furrowed with deep creases of concern. “I wish she could be here for you.”
She set the bear back on the shelf, arranging him precisely. “Your mother’s been surprisingly easy to get along with. This fresh start has been helpful perhaps. We don’t feel threatened.”
“You have no reason to feel threatened by my mother.”
“She’s certainly got it all together.”
And what about her own life? Nothing about it felt together. A whole degree and career she couldn’t remember participating in. What kind of exhibits had she been a part of?
There was no sense dwelling on it, though. Instead, she would put all of her energy into the present moment. Focusing on the past wasn’t doing anyone any good. For now, she would worry about making Thomas’s first Christmas something special.
Porter picked a reindeer and snowman ornament that read Baby’s first Christmas. He flipped it over in his hand before handing it to Alaina. “What do you think of this one?”
She traced the ceramic ornament. “It’s perfect. And speaking of firsts, since I haven’t remembered anything, let’s choose some new traditions to start today.”
The fresh start she’d been daydreaming about could begin now.
“Such as?” he asked.
So many traditions to pick from. She opted for the simplest, one that connected so many families at the holidays. “Let’s start with meals. What do we usually eat for Christmas?”
“Traditional turkey and a duck with all the trimmings. You like oyster stuffing so we have that. I like cranberry pie.”
“While that sounds delicious, let’s do away with it or eat it all on another day. For Christmas let’s serve something totally different this year. A standing rib roast...” She snapped her fingers. “Or I know—how about we have a shrimp boil?”
“A shrimp boil? For Christmas?”
“Yes,” she said, warming to the idea, feeling in control of the holiday and her new life for the first time. “In the Carolinas we call it frogmore stew, but down here it would be a shrimp boil. Shrimp, corn, new potatoes, maybe crawfish or crab or sausage in it, as well. We could have corn-bread stuffing, or crab and corn bread stuffing. What do you think?”
He held up a Santa hat and plopped it on her head. “I think you’re so excited I’ll eat anything if it makes you smile like that.” His hand slid down to cup her face. “I’ve missed your smile.”
Again, she thought about how he must feel in this situation. He’d lost his wife, for all intents and purposes. First to the coma and now to her inability to remember what they’d been to each other. And this certainly couldn’t have been how he’d envisioned their first Christmas with their child. “I’m sorry for all the pain this is causing you.”
“I’m not in pain right now. I’m happy. Really happy.”
His eyes shone with sincerity that sent tingles into her stomach.
“Let’s shop. This is one time I won’t complain about all that money you have. Let’s be Santa.”